Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable? • Hacker News Board

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#941

Post by rixed » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 8:31 AM UTC

trod1234 wrote: post #921

ravenstine wrote: post #593

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm both glad and dismayed to hear that I'm not the only one who likens public school to prison. I went to school in California, and I would say my school experience became prison-like between grades 4 and 11. In fairness, I can now look back at my child self and realize that I was delayed in terms of emotional maturity, which contributed to my social problems, but the kind of environment I was in was the wrong one f…

School was and remains a prison, that is why they build the gates so high. Worse, its a prison with cult-like re-education towards elements of Marxism, without calling it that, in many cases. Its a spectrum so not all teachers are like that, but there are enough that it can be seen widely. Most of this comes from teacher's followed recommendations made during conferences held by the National Teachers union, which has…

What you say about the reality and mechanisms of torture may be true. But your insistence on assigning this behavior to some political side is, frankly, frightening.

It won't change the amount of political violence that's ahead of us, but I would recommend that you, at a personal level, question those associations.

No political side, no country, or race has the monopoly of evil, and if you believe otherwise you have some serious work to do.

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#942

Post by Meekro » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 9:08 AM UTC

cratermoon wrote: post #137

aurareturn wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You could literally live next to a school and there’s a chance your kids can’t go there. There are many kids from low income, broken families who are just really bad students. Bullies. Disruptive. Disrespectful to teachers. It was hell going through public schools in SF.

So it's "opt out of being around average people", then?

Average people are cool. We're trying to opt out of being around the bottom 10%.

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#943

Post by globalise83 » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 9:17 AM UTC

lordnacho wrote: post #588

rgblambda wrote: post #481

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There were problems with the grammar school system as well. They were created to provide a pathway to the middle class for bright children from working class families. But the entrance exam was heavily biased in favour of children from middle class backgrounds. Famously the first 11+ tests had questions like "Name the various types of servants in a household and what they do". In later years, getting out of school tu…

Can confirm. My kid got in, and it turns out everyone else used a tutor (I stupidly took the advice not to do so from his teacher, who thought he'd get in just fine). This is in fact why playdates seemed to die out in the year or two before the test, the kids were being tutored but for some reason nobody would admit it. When I went for the intro evening, the parents were simply the same kinds of people (often the sam…

I am guessing you live in an area with high average housing prices in the catchment area of your school? Over the past 60 years, several generations of parents moving to catchment areas of good schools creates a self-reinforcing loop where only middle class people can afford to live near good schools.

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#944

Post by nickd2001 » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 10:37 AM UTC

graemep wrote: post #772

dijit wrote: post #389

OK I guess I’m going to go against the deluge of comments here; And give an appreciable reason instead of denigrating those who might choose this. The context, though, I am British. I grew up in Britain. I went to British school. I can’t speak universally about my experience, (even within all of Britain), because it’s my experience which is in one small area of the country. However, school, for me, was by far the sin…

Also British, although i was living abroad when I started home educating (the correct term in UK law, and more accurate because the whole point is that its not HE). > It took becoming an adult to learn for myself that I enjoyed learning. My school was not learning This is why I stuck with home educating up to GCSEs. I wanted my kids to enjoy learning and they do. They have a very wide range of interests and good acad…

Interesting story and very good points :) I certainly have concerns, that much of the curriculum in school here in UK is basically pointless box-ticking (metrics as you refer to it), and a certain part of the day is just a waste of time and/or at a pace that doesn't suit brighter kids. OTOH there's some great stuff at school that'd otherwise be hard to replicate. I know people that do homeschool or private school with good reason, due to the limitations of state school. Sounds like you've done a lot to ensure your kids have friends and go to things where they meet other kids. So in your case, probably the lack of social side is less of an issue... however, isn't that quite an investment of your time? (and to some extent cost). you list a lot of things your kids go to, that must mean quite a lot of "ferrying" / "taxi-ing" around? Or are they very independent and using public transport? To me , it sound like you've done homeschooling right, but I kind of wonder whether a lot of people would be unable or not enlightened enough to do all the social side you've done.

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#945

Post by swiftcoder » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 10:37 AM UTC

graemep wrote: post #787

swiftcoder wrote: post #775

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well, normal, boring people tend to send their kids to school, so your chances of a normal, boring homeschooling experience are pretty slim. And even the most well-intentioned of counter cultural folks don't always excel at parenting, never mind educating. I've met a fair number of other homeschooled folks over the years who had a great childhood, but I've met more for whom the lack of community/government oversight…

> Well, normal, boring people tend to send their kids to school, so your chances of a normal, boring homeschooling experience are pretty slim. Depends what you mean by normal. My experience is kids get more freedom, meet a wide range of people, and generally get a much better education. Maybe it is different here in the UK. > And even the most well-intentioned of counter cultural folks don't always excel at parenting…

> Maybe it is different here in the UK.

Yes, I was originally homeschooled in the UK, and while a lot of the parents where pretty far out there, there was definitely a lower prevalence of weird religious cults and that sort of thing (than in the US).

> that is not what unschooling is

That's why I put "unschooling" in quotes. There are certainly folks doing ethical things under that banner, but the legitimacy of the term provides cover for a lot of folks who aren't doing the ethical thing.

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#946

Post by swiftcoder » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 10:42 AM UTC

IggleSniggle wrote: post #801

kajumix wrote: post #768

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why do you imply that the fun, constructive environment for homeschooling a long shot, but the weird religious or abusive environment is more of the norm?

I'm going to hazard a guess with zero grounding in data to attempt to answer that, caveat emptor. Please also note that even though these are my guesses, these assertions do not really reflect where I personally land on this. I'm not really sure what the breakdown is, but I think I can understand how someone gets to this point of view. -- In order for parents to choose homeschooling, some (but not all) must be presen…

> I guess there is a counter argument that people who choose to homeschool can "afford" to do so

I would say that the vast majority the quote-unquote "normal" homeschool parents I know are broke hippies/homesteaders/vanlife/wooden-sailboat types.

Definitely are rich folks who go down this path, but they tend to pay fancy private tutors and end up with something much more resembling a traditional education

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#947

Post by nickd2001 » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 11:08 AM UTC

scarmig wrote: post #665

dijit wrote: post #389

OK I guess I’m going to go against the deluge of comments here; And give an appreciable reason instead of denigrating those who might choose this. The context, though, I am British. I grew up in Britain. I went to British school. I can’t speak universally about my experience, (even within all of Britain), because it’s my experience which is in one small area of the country. However, school, for me, was by far the sin…

The people who say "it's to make you interact with normal people!" miss a key point. In the real world, you meet a person, and if they treat you like shit, you walk away. If they physically assault you in the workplace, you can report them to HR, and there's a good chance you'll never have to see them again. In school, you get told you need to have empathy for their propensity to beat you, get subtly or not-so-subtly…

Agreed but what about the person that doesn't exactly treat you like s** but they are difficult to work with, but in order for you to achieve the thing you need at work you have to work with them daily? Then walking away isn't an option - perhaps just going to work somewhere else is not feasible. So then, a certain amount of experience of dealing with idiots at school can be useful can't it? (within reason... ;) )

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#948

Post by nickd2001 » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 11:29 AM UTC

greenthrow wrote: post #883

DoubleGlazing wrote: post #760

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If it weren't for homeschooling my autistic daughter would be spending her day in the headteachers office shaking and crying due to her cripping anxiety.

I'm glad that you have a way to help your daughter. But there are many kids with similar issues and homeschooling can't be our solution for all of them. Instead we need to figure out how to accomodate them at schools.

Not sure about USA, but here in UK there are special schools for people whose autism really makes it unviable for them to be in mainstream school (whether that's a failure of the mainstream school, or just level of anxiety etc of the student). Such special schools are often wonderful, with the most amazing, dedicated staff. Usually staff have specialist training (albeit not always to as high level as one might like, due to underfunding) and much experience of working with autistic people. So, able to provide things that parents with no prior knowledge of autism, and jobs to go to and bills to pay, are less able to provide.

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#949

Post by nickd2001 » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 11:32 AM UTC

logicchains wrote: post #446

renegat0x0 wrote: post #436

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This does prepare you to life though. More likely than not you will go to office. You will find yourselves with bullies, and again you can become a victim. Rather than feeling sorry about yourself, school prepares you to fight with bullies, to find inmates, to find friends. I think you could have not understand the life lessons. You will also enter other communities, where again, you will find bullies. God how I hate…

>You will find yourselves with bullies, and again you can become a victim. I don't know what kind of places you've worked at, but everywhere I've worked if anyone behaved even 10% like the average high school bully they'd have been fired on the spot.

"everywhere I've worked if anyone behaved even 10% like the average high school bully they'd have been fired on the spot." unless...they're the CEO ? ;)

Re: Why is homeschooling becoming fashionable?

#950

Post by Mave83 » Thu, Jan 16, 2025, 11:45 AM UTC

As a German family, we opted out of the system to gain back freedom as a family. With regular school, you are bound to external schedules like vacation, when you have to get up,... We learned, that it's around 1 hour per day to achieve what kids learn during most of the day in regular schools. Doing homeschooling therefore is much more efficient time wise. in addition, we can train our kids to be self and critical thinking, something that does not exist in regular schools.

There are more reasons to consider, but these are our most important factors.