Being deaf

Hi captdeaf, would you please email me at liamotootle@gmail.com? Several of my friends are RIT graduates and our circles of acquaintances may overlap. I'd also like to ask some questions about your deaf office and the CI, if you don't mind. Thanks!

Well, there are hearing women who have ASL fluency--or whom I imagine to have ASL fluency, rather.

Kind of late to the game, but David - or anyone else for that matter - I'm deaf too, and happy to talk with you about it.

In a nutshell: don't let deafness define you. It's hard, dispiriting work at times, but believe me, there's opportunity out there in all aspects of life if you approach things with the right can-do spirit (yes, this includes finding a partner - I'm exceptionally fortunate in that regard myself :-D ).

Maybe for normal people being deaf would be a huge disability, but as a nerd, I would rather be deaf than even just have really bad (uncorrectable) eyesight.

Professionally, you could absolutely live a full life as an individual contributor while deaf with minimal accomodation. It might be hard to be an entrepreneur or senior manager, just due to the large number of in-person meetings required, but even that could be worked around (missing out on the informal communications would be a problem in some places). I would have zero problem working with a deaf engineer where all communication had to be by IM/irc/email/commit, vs. verbal; it would be just like a remote worker, which we have huge experience with as a profession now. I mean, I IRC with people in the same room to avoid distracting other people, to be more clear, and to produce a record. A deaf coworker would basically mean I could wear my HD600 open headphones instead of my DT770 closed headphones, that we'd need a visual paging system and alarm, and not a whole lot more. I've worked with people who spoke such horrible English that it was far preferable to have them write vs. speak, too.

I agree the "growing up deaf" part might be a lot different (and probably worse), but as an adult, if you suddenly went deaf (as has happened to me on several occasions), not a huge problem.

Looking for a workplace with a lot of remote workers is probably the best way to be a first-class team member while deaf.

49-year-old deaf professional here. Used to work as a web dev in the 90's, until the dot.com crash in 2000. Last gig was working for the Washington Post.

I can relate to everything sanenji's described - I'm quite like him but older. Been married twice, once to a hard of hearing woman, now with a deaf woman. Raised two fantastic children, do freelance writing on the side (here: https://influentialprose.wordpress.com/ and more recently, here: http://unitedrepublic.org/author/kmcleod/

Web dev work was great starting out. I did all of my early work solo as a consultant, then joined a firm in Arlington, VA and continued to do projects solo there. Because I communicated chiefly by e-mail, I got on good terms with all my co-workers. I didn't join others for lunch for the same reasons Sarenji mentioned, but I didn't much mind since I love to read and used the time to do that. I had a robust social life in the deaf community, so after hours I got my people time.

Everything changed when the firm was bought out by a larger company. The new management implemented a team approach, which necessitated at least one team meeting each week. I asked for 'terps, but only got them for the once-monthly company rally meeting. The real work was coordinated during the weekly meetings, and I had no clue what was being discussed. That went downhill fast, and I moved to the Post and stayed there until they began cutbacks.

I've spent the last 10 years working at a residential mental hospital for deaf patients, which has been a real adventure.

I just want to say to Sarenji - love is where you find it. Whether it's a hearing or deaf person, run with it. Just remember this; no one person is an island. Your mate comes with a network of friends, family and work, and you'll become part of that network whether you enjoy it or not. Chose carefully.

Kids - most children of deaf parents are born hearing. Mine were. They'll definitely benefit from growing bilingual. Don't worry about it. If it happens you get deaf kids, you'll be the best kind of Daddy they can possibly have, cuz you've been there and done that.

I tutored English at Gallaudet University for a while, and once worked at a residential deaf school. I've got deaf friends who are at that (not mythological) 4th grade reading level and others who read and write probably better than most hearing folks.

The common denominator I've found among deaf adults with strong English skills is they were exposed early and often to English with their parents, through reading stories. Some used ASL to explain the English, some just read the story together in signed English, but either way, early and regular exposure makes all the difference.

I think it was Helen Keller who observed that being blind cuts you off from things, and being deaf cuts you off from people. Me, I balance my life by socializing in the deaf community and doing what I can professionally in different areas, so I don't feel isolated.

Make the most of your abilities, and keep learning, all the time - it's far better than being bored.

Given all the accommodations and opportunities available for deaf people in the U.S., we probably enjoy the best environment any deaf folks who have walked this earth have ever known. Which is not to say it's perfect, but it's good enough to grab with both hands and build a satisfying life.