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Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

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Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#91

Post by analog31 »

DuckFeathers wrote: post #33

I have not met anyone who has this attitude who also happens to be a person of good breadth or depth of understanding of ANYTHING. This doesn't mean they don't exist, it's just that I can't begin to imagine what they'd be like because for all I care, they don't seem to exist. They don't have the breadth or depth of understanding of things not for the lack of trying either. It's just that they shut down everything tha…

One possible reason is that good breadth / depth of understanding requires cooperation with other humans.

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#92

Post by akvadrako »

__MatrixMan__ wrote: post #24
lifeisstillgood wrote: post #6

Two things - 1. science is the search for being right. It has brought us untold riches and wealth (and weapons). But getting humans to accept the provable facts is really really hard and usually progress is made a funeral at a time. 2. Most people who think they are right are not using scientific rigour but their own instincts and are usually full of hot air - see any middle manager for examples So yes, you are right…

Science is the search for consensus about predictions. It says nothing of truth.

Science has nothing to do with consensus – it's the belief in the ignorance of experts.

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#93

Post by rafaelero »

Truth should be sufficient, but I agree we should also develop some tact whenever we are dealing with people who are not receptive to a more direct conversation. For me, as long as I don't feel that the person is trying to hurt me by "telling the truth", then I am pretty ok with that.

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#95

Post by [deleted] »

yarg wrote: post #76
32bitkid wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is the epitome of the sentiment: those interested in the pursuit of “hard truths” are only extrinsically motivated to find fault in others and gleefully “correct” another’s “faulty” self perception. Never intrinsically motivated to better themselves… Tell me more about how everyone else in the “modern world” is the problem…

[flagged]

[deleted]

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#96

Post by groby_b »

yarg wrote: post #22
geraneum wrote: post #4

This reminds me of: “People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty.” Richard J. Needham

I think that there's the need to a counterpoint to the world that says "you're beautiful, you're smart, you're perfect just the way you are.". A lot of the time the modern world tells us that feelings are more important than objective reality. It's bullshit.

Let's put it that way. I've had the privilege to work with world class experts in three domains. (And no, I wasn't one in any of those domains, I just got really really lucky)

The people who truly knew what they were doing? Usually extremely kind. They don't need to prove their worth by being rude. They were always considerate of feelings, even when they had to tell you that you were really really bad (ask me how i know :)

None of them had to resort to "objective reality" justifications.

So, just based on that experience, I think we can all afford some kindness. It's not going to make us worse off.

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#97

Post by web007 »

brhsagain wrote: post #43

I'd argue that telling someone the truth does absolve you of responsibility, because if the truth upsets someone, what they're actually upset about is the reality of the universe. Or if it's a truth about them, then the reality about themselves. The truth-teller is just the messenger. Each person is responsible for how they deal with reality, including the parts they don't like. I get what the article is saying. Give…

> When people claim that they are just telling the truth and can't be blamed, it is likewise nonsense. We are always responsible for the words we speak and the actions we take. We're not let off the hook just because it's true.

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#99

Post by lazyasciiart »

yarg wrote: post #76
32bitkid wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is the epitome of the sentiment: those interested in the pursuit of “hard truths” are only extrinsically motivated to find fault in others and gleefully “correct” another’s “faulty” self perception. Never intrinsically motivated to better themselves… Tell me more about how everyone else in the “modern world” is the problem…

[flagged]

Why would you bother giving input when you don't care if or how it is received? Stream of consciousness oversharing isn't required for honesty. You don't have to say everything that comes into your head. Practice giving less of a fuck about everyone else and not evaluating them and telling them how great you are (which is what you achieve when you criticize someone for no reason).

Re: Is it my fault if you can't handle the truth? (2019)

#100

Post by dinom »

pwinnski wrote: post #80
dinom wrote: post #67

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think the point is that no matter how kind you are to those people they'll find a reason to take offense anyway.

In which case there's no reason to be unkind, either! If you can communicate the truth with kindness and be heard, great. If not, move on. In my experience, unkindness isn't any more effective than kindness in effecting change; it usually prompts defensiveness.

Sure, I'd go one step further too. If you've been kind and the person took offense anyway... don't just move on, avoid self-flagellation as well.
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