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Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

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Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#91
post #43

Anecdotal but my office is ultra -woke. There are endless internal emails about whatever-week, or veterans-this, or LBGTQ+-that etc etc. People have been hounded out and either quit or been fired for fairly minor "infractions" of the groupthink (...and also some people have rightly been fired for actual inappropriate behaviour). And guess what all this talk about "toxic masculinity" and generally vilifying all men le…

Now you know how the other side felt all along :). Seriously, we are now asked to treat everyone with respect and that is a problem? Edit: No I don't mean eye for eye. I am merely pointing out, this is a male dominant industry where women didn't even have a chance for a long time. The moment we face little uneasiness, we are complaining and throwing temper tantrums.

The problem isn’t to treat people with respect. The problem is that some few people are absolutely hellbent on interpreting any interaction through a lens of sexism or racism, and a large silent majority allows them for fear of drawing unwanted attention and/or harm.

This is not to say that sexism or racism isn’t or hasn’t been a large problem, but the correction pendulum has really swung way too far for some people and that is actually not at all helpful since it only builds up resentment among people who actually are supporters of the cause of equality.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#92

Creating a throwaway for obvious reasons. I'm not an investor but someone who is in a position to make key decisions about peoples' careers and give advice, and I do have a bit of a trick I use for this. There was one black female mentee who I noticed was timid in taking credit for her work. I had recently attended a diversity panel where someone in a similar role as me said that in a similar situation, and her advic…

Thought experiment:

I do wonder if some boss in the future will only employ straight white males simply to avoid people "offending" others (it's hard to offend a straight white male in this new woke ideology). Of course this has the opposite effect to what the woke seem to want, but this is the world we have built ourselves.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#93
post #43

Anecdotal but my office is ultra -woke. There are endless internal emails about whatever-week, or veterans-this, or LBGTQ+-that etc etc. People have been hounded out and either quit or been fired for fairly minor "infractions" of the groupthink (...and also some people have rightly been fired for actual inappropriate behaviour). And guess what all this talk about "toxic masculinity" and generally vilifying all men le…

Now you know how the other side felt all along :). Seriously, we are now asked to treat everyone with respect and that is a problem? Edit: No I don't mean eye for eye. I am merely pointing out, this is a male dominant industry where women didn't even have a chance for a long time. The moment we face little uneasiness, we are complaining and throwing temper tantrums.

Yes, that’s what it’s about. Turnabout is fair play. You should think through the long term consequences of that.

I wish you weren’t getting downvoted because I think your comment reveals so much.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#94
It doesn't help that the benchmark for oppression gets lower every day. It used to be a concerted, systematic action that's targeted at a small group. Today, it's pretty much anything which hurts one's feelings.

Here's a hot take: This is what happens when kids don't get bullied at school. They don't learn to build the necessary emotional circuitry and calluses to deal with emotional damage.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#95

Anecdotal but my office is ultra -woke. There are endless internal emails about whatever-week, or veterans-this, or LBGTQ+-that etc etc. People have been hounded out and either quit or been fired for fairly minor "infractions" of the groupthink (...and also some people have rightly been fired for actual inappropriate behaviour). And guess what all this talk about "toxic masculinity" and generally vilifying all men le…

Care to define what those "fairly minor infractions of the groupthink" were? With respect, and I'm not saying this is you, but often I've heard that type of line - and then when you get into the detail, the firing was an obvious correct decision. Edit: lol @ the downvotes, you can k!ss my @ss. Glad to have you here as I guess you were rejected from Parler.

Firing is a straw man.

Obviously it’s usually justified because there are legal consequences otherwise.

The problem is all the other things that can happen that aren’t firing.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#96

Why would you talk to women at all professionally, unless there are reliable witnesses or video recordings? As we increasingly see, witch hunts are already possible by deliberately misinterpreting written statements like mails or bug tracker messages. I would not want to get into a he-said-she-said real life situation. Mike Pence understood this early.

Because I'm a professional, and strive to avoid treating people differently based on their gender/sex?

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#97

Anecdotal but my office is ultra -woke. There are endless internal emails about whatever-week, or veterans-this, or LBGTQ+-that etc etc. People have been hounded out and either quit or been fired for fairly minor "infractions" of the groupthink (...and also some people have rightly been fired for actual inappropriate behaviour). And guess what all this talk about "toxic masculinity" and generally vilifying all men le…

If I ever get fired for not being woke enough, I am going to breathe a sigh of relief. I'm 100% tired of all of it, to the point that I almost want someone to cancel me.

Maybe seek therapy? "I want to be publicly labelled as an abuser" seems like an unhealthy thought pattern. If this is causing you that much grief, you should seriously consider talking to someone. It might make you feel a lot better, and you won't even have to have your life ruined.

edit Please explain downvotes? Suggesting a person saying "I want someone to cancel me" seek help is downvote worthy now?

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#98
post #71

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not good. Some of us have felt like that for thirty years. Once apon a time there were a group of people who swaggered through life saying whatever popped into their brains whom ever it offended or belittled. They engaged in metaphorical, but brutal, wrestling matches not just with each other but with any body who crossed their paths. Now life is very hard for them. Should have happened thirty years ago. Has it gone…

My problem with "woke culture" is that it's constantly fighting an imaginary enemy, some abstract concept that's been conjured up. I hazard to say this post is a good example of the problem.

An enemy is not imaginary if you yourself did not experience it.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#99

Creating a throwaway for obvious reasons. I'm not an investor but someone who is in a position to make key decisions about peoples' careers and give advice, and I do have a bit of a trick I use for this. There was one black female mentee who I noticed was timid in taking credit for her work. I had recently attended a diversity panel where someone in a similar role as me said that in a similar situation, and her advic…

I am very glad you rethought that racist sexist approach. It was a learning experience for you. I am glad it did you no harm, even better.

People need to be tolerant of casual racism and sexism, up to a point. People have been raised like this, advised to to act like this, they need a chance to learn. It is tough on those on the receiving end, and unjust. But the world will not change over night and the prejudice is so ingrained at every level of our society.

This poster here shows that prejudice can be easily overcome if not combined with bigotry

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Men Clamming Up

#100

Creating a throwaway for obvious reasons. I'm not an investor but someone who is in a position to make key decisions about peoples' careers and give advice, and I do have a bit of a trick I use for this. There was one black female mentee who I noticed was timid in taking credit for her work. I had recently attended a diversity panel where someone in a similar role as me said that in a similar situation, and her advic…

This situation is extremely sad because the whole "have the confidence of a medicine white man" thing is a common slogan used by feminists to try to combat the general lower levels of self-confidence among women. I guess you yourself repeating the same woke quite took away the uniqueness of the idea as it would be articulated by a non privledged individual. https://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-08-15/carry-yourself-with-t…

I made a successful complaint to my HR department when someone used that very phrase. I very much agreed with the part of the person's intent to support and embolden the woman. But it's not OK to attack other people in the effort to support someone. Why not say something positive like "other people can do it, so can you"?
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