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Don’t Waste Your Twenties

artofmanliness.com

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Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#81

Post by nQuo »

henryaj wrote: post #70
Nursie wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I guess in my case I guess had a hook, I was part of a scene (the goth scene, in case you want a laugh, though in the UK it isn't/wasn't synonymous with angry teenagers or Marilyn Manson). Once you're on the inside of something like that then the barriers to meeting new people within the scene are significantly reduced, though obviously you're perceived to have put up barriers to everyone else to a greater or lesser…

'Just do stuff' (or, more specifically, 'take more risks') is my one resolution for 2013. I'm meeting new people through online meetups, CouchSurfing, Twitter, and just randomly chatting up strangers (a skill I'm trying to actively develop). It's a fun ride. Thanks for the advice! If you're ever in London, let me buy you a beer.

I'm in London too. 24, with a similar resolution to get out of my comfort zone. Let's grab a pint or two.

iMessage or email: nquo at iCloud dot com

Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#82

Post by AutoCorrect »

There is no such thing as 'wasting your life'. You live every second of your life, how you live it is up to you, and to a smaller (but not always small) extent up to the circumstances around you. Every decision you make (or don't) pushes you in a direction, sort of a life vector. You can change the direction and the size of the vector, but it's yours, no matter what, and it's not a waste. Even if you live your entire life and leave not a ripple behind you, your life still has worth. Don't read articles like this and let them make you feel bad about what you think you haven't accomplished.

Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#83

Post by jasonkester »

rohansingh wrote: post #71
jasonkester wrote: post #21

Here are three of my decades thus far. I'm trying to decide which of these was "wasted" according to the article: Phase I, 21-30: "Work hard/Play hard" mode, socking away retirement savings, building skills & reputation to prepare for Phase II, nights & weekends packed with climbing trips and going out. "I think I can get a full night sleep the weekend after next". Phase II, 30-40: "Semi-retired nomad" mode, working…

Well, I'm only 24, but my life seems to be taking a pretty similar route already :) Mind if I ask where this beautiful bouldering near Paris is? Are you referring to Fontainebleau? I've really been meaning to take advantage of being in Europe and heading down there but haven't had the chance to yet. Perhaps this summer.

Yep, Fontainebleau. Ten minutes on foot to Franchard Carriers, or five minutes in the car to most of the better known areas. Close enough that I can bill a full day and still get out on the rock for a full session if conditions are good.

Property in France is amazingly cheap if your only other point of reference is Southern California.

Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#84

Post by spennino »

acabal wrote: post #5

I hate these kinds of articles because they can put tremendous pressure on people. There isn't a "right" way to spend your twenties (or thirties, or any decade) and comparing yourself to Einstein and Newton and Kepler like this article does is worse than counterproductive. The only way you should concern yourself with living is to try to be happy every day, whatever that means to you. Listening to pundits showing you…

This article isn't trying to promote the "right way" to spend your twenties. It ends with asking the question, "But what kinds of things should you channel [20s brain power] towards?" It's just trying to highlight many of the advantages young brains have that are often overlooked. Especially in traditional careers where the 20s are consumed by degrees and climbing corporate/professional ladders.

Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#85

Post by theorique »

jessriedel wrote: post #61
theorique wrote: post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Fair point. Chasing happiness (esp. short term pleasure) as an end in itself, rather than as a side effect of doing valuable things, is unlikely to result in happiness. But I think a strategic view of "what big choices in life will contribute to long term happiness?" is a still good thing to consider.

Isn't that the opposite of the original sentence I quoted?

It could be.

I think if a person's "happiness every day" is "smoke crack and gamble in search of a short-lived rush", he needs to reevaluate, because that won't serve long term happiness.

OTOH, if a person's "happiness every day" is "do yoga, spend time with family, and work reasonable hours at a job he enjoys", then that's a good idea.

Ideally, the short term and the long term are reasonably aligned, otherwise you get problems.

Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#86

Post by coldpie »

henryaj wrote: post #48
Nursie wrote: post #4

At Age 20: I was partying like a madman, it was awesome At Age 21: Graduated, seeing a great girl, making a little money, enjoying city life At Age 22: Still having fun, meeting and sleeping with new people At Age 23: Yup. Same. At Age 24: New girl, same awesome life At Age 25: Lots of international travel this year. More great friends made Fun! At Age 26: More of the same. And I'm still doing financially fine (thoug…

Awesome. It sounds like you had a great decade! Do you have any pointers for us early-twentysomethings? I've just turned 23 and while I'm having fun in the city, enjoying the world of work, it doesn't sound quite as interesting as the same part of your life. How did you meet new friends, expand your social network, sleep with new people, and enjoy the metropolis? I've found the transition from university to work has…

Find a hobby (preferably separate from what you do at your job, but whatever) and find people who participate in it. I chose auto racing, and I'm volunteering to do corner stations at one or two ChumpCar races this summer. Hoping to get a team together next year.

If you're not the social type, don't worry about having lots of friends. For me, there's probably around 10 people that I consider friends and that's plenty. Just find something you like and find some other people who like doing it.

Re: Don’t Waste Your Twenties

#90

Post by bad_user »

graeme wrote: post #77
acabal wrote: post #5

I hate these kinds of articles because they can put tremendous pressure on people. There isn't a "right" way to spend your twenties (or thirties, or any decade) and comparing yourself to Einstein and Newton and Kepler like this article does is worse than counterproductive. The only way you should concern yourself with living is to try to be happy every day, whatever that means to you. Listening to pundits showing you…

Some people do need to hear this though. I spent ages 15-23 playing video games for hours. I could have learned programming in that time. (Probably would have, if someone had told me that programming existed) It was fun at the time, but not really fun to reminisce on (unlike partying, which I don't regret). If I could say two things to my younger self, 'ditch video games and do something with more value' would be the…

When speaking about learning stuff, some people are more ready to learn than others.

Programming is tough. If you lack the patience and the passion and the resources, you aren't going to learn programming, no matter how many self-improvement articles you may read.

I tried hard to learn programming since I was 12 years old. This was in 95 and I didn't have an accessible Internet connection or books and Linux was awful back then so I was working with QBasic and a pirated Turbo Pascal and 1 or 2 shitty books. I was also not ready for it, as I was lacking the necessary knowledge or the patience for doing things bigger than bubble-sort and hello-world. Only in high-school I managed to get more serious about it, but even then I lacked the resources and good teachers and I also had lots of other problems on my mind, as any other teenager.

Of course, for you playing video games was probably a waist of time, but if you wouldn't have had played those games than you have no idea how you would have filled that surplus of time.

And really, where's the rush?

I admire 12 year-olds that hack on stuff, but they do so because that makes them happy and because we live in a different age. Not because they are rushing to get somewhere.

I fucking hate this trait of western culture.

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