Redbean is just 155Kb without the need for alpine or any other dependency. You just copy the Redbean binary and your static assets, no complicated build steps and hundred MB download necessary. Check it out: https://github.com/kissgyorgy/redbean-docker
Wow! This is the Redbean which is an "Actually Portable Executable", or a binary that can run on a range of OSes (Linux, Windows, MacOS, BSDs). http://justine.lol/ape.html
I believe the best chance we have of [building binaries "to stand the test of time with minimal toil"], is by gluing together the binary interfaces that've already achieved a decades-long consensus, and ignoring the APIs. . . . Platforms can't break them without breaking themselves.