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My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

theatlantic.com

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Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#81

Post by lovich »

dpcan wrote: post #50
coderholic wrote: post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Me too! We're jugging 3 kids and working from home, and I thought the article was on point. My guess is that most of the dismissive comments are from people without kids!

I have 4 kids. I work from home. My wife works 11 hours a day away from the house. I feel like this world is full of "can't" people who aren't willing to do the extra work. We seem to have enough time to comment on Hacker News. To argue about masks on Facebook. To watch every TikTok, and spend hours on Twitter. But put in the necessary work to make learning at home productive. Nope, can't do that. We have put in the…

What exactly is your daily routine then. Raising 4 kids while working full time with your spouse working 11 hours outside of the house is a pretty large claim.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#82

Post by marta_morena_25 »

actfrench wrote: post #54

Here's a crazy idea: What if we raised our children to process their difficult emotions instead of suppress them and stay active and move freely while working and studying (instead of sitting in a chair at a desk)

Here is a crazy idea that needs to come before this: What if we taught our adult population to process their difficult emotions instead of suppressing them and stay active and move freely while working and studying.

Actually, this already falls flat in the first section. At least 90% of adult fail on that one. How are they supposed to teach something to their children that they themselves don't even understand? And teaching is usually much more difficult than understanding something yourself.

Which brings us to "school should teach that". But schools are not designed for that and teachers are not qualified for that. Hell, it's already an exception to meet a teacher who can properly convey the meaning of "1+1=2", not to mention a teacher who can teach children, who are not their own, how to process difficult emotions. Good luck with that

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#83

Post by dpcan »

rootusrootus wrote: post #75
dpcan wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And yet, with a little time, patience, and dedication from parents, all children can be taught to be respectful, focus, and learn the way we need them to learn during a strange and complicated time. This world is full of can't can't can't. Everywhere we turn, if there's an inconvenience involved. If we have to do something boring. If it won't be fun. If it's hard work..... we can't do it. It can't be done. I wish we…

> This world is full of can't can't can't. The world is filled with plenty of that, and it always has been. But plenty of people are absolutely tackling this mess with a can-do attitude. You're just not seeing it, for whatever reason. > But I'm out of hope. And that may be the reason ;-). Turning off the news is the best choice I've ever made. Can't be too depressed when I don't get bombarded constantly with BS, we'r…

Unfortunately the laziness is all around us where I live. We’ve struggled for the last 10 years to find more than 2 or 3 other families that think the way we do.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#84

Post by rolph »

there were these PBS programs called sesame street, the electric company and even one actually called zoom.

there was little problem with user engagement as the kiddies were glued to it, and assimilated/imitated the concepts quite readily into playtimes and IRL. perhaps there is a feature set that could be explored and employed in remote learning scenarios.

i think that current educators could learn a lot by looking back at the methods of engagement.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#85

Post by supergeek133 »

coderholic wrote: post #68
supergeek133 wrote: post #59

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I understand dealing with children, I'm not being dismissive (at least I don't think I am) of that. I'm confused why this was written or published. There is no "point". Yes, it's very hard to keep adults much less kids cooped up in a house all day. Especially for 6+ months. But, what else are we supposed to do? This is just a paid, public gripe that a lot of people can relate with, but what purpose does it serve? The…

> This is just a paid, public gripe that a lot of people can relate with It is > but what purpose does it serve? It lets the millions of other parents who find themselves suddenly in the same situation, feeling the same things, know they're not alone, and that the struggle is real!

That's fair enough, but that's not a fair indictment on virtual education (per the headline). The premise stinks.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#86

Post by james_s_tayler »

pyzon wrote: post #62

I can't help but feel that many of the dismissive comments here must be either from folks without kids, or from people that got lucky with a well-mannered child. You think those good manners were all your amazing parenting? You probably deserve some credit, but I think you also lucked out more than you realize. Haven't you seen parents with multiple kids and those kids have wildly different dispositions? I urge you t…

Ah... this. So much this.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#87

Post by somethoughts »

MisterBastahrd wrote: post #61
dj_mc_merlin wrote: post #40

All of these comments make me think HN has never interacted with a 5 year old. Adults are barely able to make it through a day of Zoom meetings without feeling drained, how do you expect an almost toddler to react when forced to sit in front of a screen? The only reasons adults can do it is years and years of learning impulse controls and suppression of bad emotions for everyone's good. A 5 year old does not have the…

I have two 7 year olds and a 9 year old. They are taught a remote curriculum, supplemented by homework in the form of online quizzes that reward correct answer with turns at a video game. They LOVE doing this homework, which is every bit as rigorous as the homework done via paper sheets, because it rewards them for getting their answers right in a way that a number at the top of a page never would. And they get their…

Just out of curiosity what is the online quiz app? Is it Prodigy (www.prodigygame.com)?

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#88

Post by bcrosby95 »

Waterluvian wrote: post #24
causality0 wrote: post #17

hit his parents, hit his brother, broke things, and spat a cup of juice all over my laptop. Barring some kind of psychiatric problem like ODD, that's a significant failure of discipline, the responsibility for which lies squarely on the shoulders of the parent. I would not trust any kind generalized behavioral prediction from someone who can't keep a five year old from striking their siblings and intentionally destro…

I thought I was failing as a parent because my 3 year old sometimes _still_ pushes my 1 year old. I feel terrible for the child and for the parent(s) who have created a _lot_ of work for themselves, the child, and maybe even society. But I also feel a wee bit of relief of, "okay so maybe I'm being too hard on myself."

The late 3's were tough with our oldest. When our twins turned 6 months she totally had it out for the boy twin and would near constantly try to hurt him. It really didn't matter what we did or threatened. 5 minutes after a timeout, or us taking away something she wanted, she would be back at it again. Oh yes, she didn't like timeouts - she would kick and scream and cry during those timeouts. But it didn't matter.

All we could really do was make sure they were physically separated as much as possible. That helped a lot. But the times they got close, she usually took advantage and did something to hurt him. E.g. if he was near her path to the bathroom, she would step on his hand while walking close to him.

Ultimately, she just grew out of it around 4 years old. But it was a really stressful and unfun time period.

She's 5 now, and the twins are 3. She loves playing with them. Until she doesn't of course, but even still - for the past 1.5 years she doesn't want to do anything without them.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#89

Post by sarakayakomzin »

dpcan wrote: post #65
mumblemumble wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If, by "a little time", you mean a few years, until they're psychologically developed enough that you can expect this of them. "The way we need them to learn" strikes me as a very telling choice of words. This is a moment where we need to be meeting their needs, not just molding them to our expectations.

My son had to miss pre-school when he was 4. I created a home-based program (week to week) where we learned everything I could find that would normally be in a regular pre-school curriculum. We worked for 3 hours every morning "studying", and he was 4. I made it fun. I made it productive. We took breaks. We had snacks. We had recess. It worked. By the end of the summer, he was reading and more prepared for Kindergart…

>I created a home-based program (week to week) where we learned everything I could find that would normally be in a regular pre-school curriculum.

>We worked for 3 hours every morning "studying", and he was 4.

>Yes. If parents stop complaining, and get down to work, and make this fun for their kids, and have a positive attitude, even the youngest students can learn from home.

this is so out of touch with reality that it doesn't even begin an argument in good faith.

Re: My kid can’t handle a virtual education, and neither can I

#90

Post by cameronfraser »

dpcan wrote: post #65
mumblemumble wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If, by "a little time", you mean a few years, until they're psychologically developed enough that you can expect this of them. "The way we need them to learn" strikes me as a very telling choice of words. This is a moment where we need to be meeting their needs, not just molding them to our expectations.

My son had to miss pre-school when he was 4. I created a home-based program (week to week) where we learned everything I could find that would normally be in a regular pre-school curriculum. We worked for 3 hours every morning "studying", and he was 4. I made it fun. I made it productive. We took breaks. We had snacks. We had recess. It worked. By the end of the summer, he was reading and more prepared for Kindergart…

What you did with your child is vastly different than sitting them down in front of a computer screen for hours. You interacted with your child and gave them a social experience and hands on activities. People have to work and can't just take off to be full time teachers for their children. Sure you would have loved Zoom, but I doubt your child would have.
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