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Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

economist.com

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Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#81

Post by mythrwy »

hux_ wrote: post #42
timthelion wrote: post #19

I believe that social media is a symptom, not the cause, of the great loneliness that our modern aloneness has caused. We are alone much of the time, especially in American suburbia. Even when we are in the city filled with people, these people are just blank faces whom we do not know. We are seeking any form of connection that we can get. And when the only connection to others that we have is through the computer, w…

The cause is 30-40 years of a mindless consumption culture. It has given us growth but at a price. The good news is we it seems to be hitting it limits. And that's when things change. For the better.

No that's not it. The _real_ cause for this angst is so many people disparaging the mindless consumption culture. (Perhaps teenagers are afraid there won't be opportunity to participate :).

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#82

Post by dazc »

timthelion wrote: post #55
johndoe489 wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> and I'd be confused, why people were laughing and interacting without words. It was a while till I realized that they were chatting on IRC. Call me oldschool.. I'm just 43 and I still have that split second confusion every time I see someone speak aloud in the metro or tram here with their glassy stare, looking in front of them, while speaking to apparently no one. Every god damn time I'm like "(0.3 seconds) OH..."…

That's a bit of a culture shock for me. Because talking on a cell phone is taboo in the Prague mass transport system. People will occasionally have a short and apologetically whispered phone call, but if you talk out loud old people will stare at you angrily and may even psht.

Sounds ideal to me.

In the UK we have 'silent carriages' on trains but after a while the 'loud and impolite' people started to realise there was little or no enforcement so, although we still have them, they are pretty much redundant.

In Spain (where I'm living now) there seems to be a class divide (much more in the UK) regarding etiquette for loud talking and phone conversations. Local busses and trains can be sheer hell yet longer distance services and flights tend to be quite civilised.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#84

Post by brndnmtthws »

throwaway413 wrote: post #16
PuffinBlue wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Can you expand on this? I don't really understand how x lead to y as i don't have much idea about social media addiction at all or its effects.

We moved to a new city. I work full time (from home) as a SWE. She is a stay at home mom. She met new people on IG in our new city, made friends. I thought it was great. My wife has a hole deep inside her from years of childhood abuse. She has no career, is early 20s like myself, and has yet to figure herself out. As the months went by, she filled that hole more and more with her connections on IG and less with our f…

Sounds like you dodged one. Probably the best thing you could do for her at this point is to stop funding her lifestyle. It's hard, but that's the reality check she needs. She'll figure out quickly that she can't exchange her IG likes for fiat currency, and will therefore face the tough and necessary--but inevitable--lesson.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#85

Post by brndnmtthws »

If you take a train or a bus, or are in any other public space, you may notice that a bunch of people (young and old) spend their time staring into their phones. And most of the time, if you glance at their phone, you'll see they're on Instagram. They're staring into this machine fantasizing about some image of how great life is, meanwhile their real life is passing them by. And they wonder why they're not getting all the likes.

As the current president would say, SAD.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#86

Post by k4ch0w »

0xBA5ED wrote: post #13
hacker_9 wrote: post #8

I'd say this is more a problem with human nature, that social media is just exposing at a whole new level. It's basic biology to want to be the best, in order to attract the best mate etc. Social media has blown open a world where not only is there always someone better, more attractive, more fun, more social-able etc than you but also that the levels these people reach will always be unobtainable for you.

This is how I feel about all the people on HN who are vastly smarter than me.

I like being around the guys here on HN. I don't mind that they are smarter than I. You always learn something new and are surrounded by the latest in Tech. I'd say just surrounding yourself with the people here will in turn make you smarter/knowledgeable.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#87

Post by k4ch0w »

throwaway413 wrote: post #16
PuffinBlue wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Can you expand on this? I don't really understand how x lead to y as i don't have much idea about social media addiction at all or its effects.

We moved to a new city. I work full time (from home) as a SWE. She is a stay at home mom. She met new people on IG in our new city, made friends. I thought it was great. My wife has a hole deep inside her from years of childhood abuse. She has no career, is early 20s like myself, and has yet to figure herself out. As the months went by, she filled that hole more and more with her connections on IG and less with our f…

Hey man, I hope shit gets better for you. That sounds awful and I don't think it's that uncommon today.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#88

Post by hiram112 »

dudul wrote: post #66
stijnh wrote: post #58

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Meanwhile I’m paying about ~$4k a month in just rent and car bills for her. Not including anything else. You are contributing to her horrific lifestyle. You need to cut everything off. There is no other way to save her and yourself.

How is he supposed to do so? If they were indeed married and went through a divorce there is likely a court order forcing him to pay for her lifestyle.

Yep. In California or New York, it's typically a year of alimony for each 2 years of marriage. At 10 years, it's lifetime. So he definitely dodged a bullet.

But for a few years, he's probably on the hook for half his income since she was stay-at-home with no career.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#89

Post by tuxxy »

throwaway413 wrote: post #45
Al-Khwarizmi wrote: post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wow. This is a really sad story. I'm really sorry for you and hope you can get over this and find a better partner. Are you forced by the courts to pay her that $4K+/month? Because it would probably be better (not only for you, which is obvious, but for her) if you didn't.

No, we haven’t gone to court, no alimony or payments - luckily she wants to avoid it because her parents had a very messy divorce in her childhood. I pay for her because honestly I’m scared of the lifestyle my child will live. She doesn’t work. She makes no money. She would be on the streets honestly. Doesn’t speak to either of her parents. I recently emptied our joint bank account save $100. She flipped. Every time…

A person who is close to me has went through something similar.

I would admonish that you get a lawyer ASAP and talk out your options. This needs to be handled legally before someone does something they regret.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#90

Post by 0xBA5ED »

k4ch0w wrote: post #86
0xBA5ED wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is how I feel about all the people on HN who are vastly smarter than me.

I like being around the guys here on HN. I don't mind that they are smarter than I. You always learn something new and are surrounded by the latest in Tech. I'd say just surrounding yourself with the people here will in turn make you smarter/knowledgeable.

Oh, I agree. I learn a lot here. It's the best corner of the web.
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