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What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

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Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#71

Post by zero_intp »

A good friend and co-worker died recently, worked together for 10 years. Hard worker, lived in Cali and flew out every quarter. We shared being assholes who get shit done by working hard, long, and speaking truth to power.

He died by driving fast, impatiently, killing his wife and unborn child. We shared a love of fast cars and recklessness.

His death has helped me re-evaluate. Selling (trying) my fast car, going part time to travel. Working hard for a company and dieing suddenly seems so ultimately unfulfilled.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#72

Post by Spooky23 »

My uncle worked for a financial services firm in the 80s. A consultant was in a computer room working on something very early in the morning and had a heart attack.

Someone discovered the guy, called 911, and went about their business. Due to some combination of bureaucratic bungling and security nonsense, the ambulance folks didn't know someone had died, and were either turned away from the building or taken to the wrong location in the building.

Long story short, the body wasn't removed until early evening. People thought he was taking a nap. I always found that so sad. The poor guy probably had a family and people who gave a shit about him, but the people around him couldn't be bothered to treat him with respect.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#73

Post by gcb0 »

teraflop wrote: post #63
steven2012 wrote: post #52

One of my coworkers, my mentor and someone who taught me what it meant to be a good programmer, was murdered by his wife, who also murdered their two children and then killed herself. It took place over a holiday, and I noticed he hadn't shown up afterwards. After a couple of days, I asked my boss if he was on vacation, and he said no, so I emailed him. His body and his family were found the next day by his neighbors…

FYI, bluekitten, you've been hellbanned since December 13.

OT, i still use my hellbanned accounts (have one for each device/place). and i always browse with showdead on.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#74

Post by walkon »

I don't think this article is just about how people react to a coworker dying. It's an observation that regular presence of someone, particularly in the workplace, doesn't automatically lead the relationship past an acquaintance level. Obligatory social routine and superficial small talk might make us feel comfortable with each other, but beyond that, there might be nothing deeper there. Some of us our surrounded by familiar faces and conversations each day, while entirely disconnected and alone.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#75

Post by cema »

AznHisoka wrote: post #54
MartinCron wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Just yesterday I was nearly run over by a taxi (in Seattle, what?) running a red light. As I realized he wasn't stopping I thought to myself, "at least all my code is checked in and pushed". True story.

God, I hate taxis.. always beeping at you when you take 1 second to cross the street or make a turn (if you're riding in front of it)

We are all just 1 second away from a tragedy.

When I was learning how to drive a car my instructor told me: see the light turned green, hold on, wait for an idiot, then wait for a taxi cab, then go slowly.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#76

Post by dnqthao »

walkon wrote: post #74

I don't think this article is just about how people react to a coworker dying. It's an observation that regular presence of someone, particularly in the workplace, doesn't automatically lead the relationship past an acquaintance level. Obligatory social routine and superficial small talk might make us feel comfortable with each other, but beyond that, there might be nothing deeper there. Some of us our surrounded by…

it reminds me of the Narrator in Fight Club, after he got bruised eyes, nobody cared to ask him about that.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#77

Post by spacecowboy »

When I first started working as a manager for a group of folks, my own manager insisted that if one day someone in my group didn't show up for work and there wasn't a phone call or email or a note, he said to always try to get in touch with the individual to see if everything was ok. My manager was so insistent on following this practice so I asked him why he felt so strongly about this. He said he had an experience in which he had one of his folks not show up for work - no phone call, no email, no note so he tried to reach the individual by phone. After no response given multiple attempts to reach him, by late afternoon, my boss decided to drive out to the individual's house. When he got to his house, he found the gentleman passed out in front of his house. Thankfully, this story ended up with a happy ending.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#78

Post by grecy »

RougeFemme wrote: post #29
jboggan wrote: post #8

This has happened in my experience before, and it is one of the strongest reasons for good source control that is infrequently considered. It was a tragedy when a very wonderful and dear researcher in our group died suddenly, especially to his three children and wife that he left behind. It was also a great loss as well that we could never recover some key bits of source code from his computer, and that a very promis…

When I've worked at places that had poor source control and/or poor documentation, I've resorted to trying to push for it by walking around saying, "Suppose I (or fill-in-the-blank) get hit by a bus? You'll all be up a creek."

During University, my professors routinely called this "The bus scenario", are harped it on us every project.

Luckily, nobody got hit by a bus, but we all wound up very diligent at source control.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#79

Post by grecy »

Refefer wrote: post #5

Reminds me a little too much of the regrets of the dying[1]. Ingrained deep within our mammalian brains is the instinctual desire for community and personal intimacy. We'd do well to remember ourselves and what makes us happy before we're reflecting from our own death bed. [1] http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html

A while back I found a website (or article?) that interviewed elderly people who where essentially on their deathbeds. What do you regret, what would you do differently, etc. etc.

Without fail, every single person said they wish they went to work less, and spent more time with their loved ones.

I personally, am not good at learning lessons from other people, usually I have to learn "the hard way". I hope I can learn this one from others.

Re: What Happens When One of Your Coworkers Dies

#80

Post by thesteamboat »

atgm wrote: post #47
theorique wrote: post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In Japan it happens so often they have their own word for it: karoshi . Sararimen fall over dead at their desks, and others simply avert their eyes and focus on their work while a manager urgently calls for white-gloved personnel to spirit the corpse away to the undertaker. Nobody even misses a beat. The work must go on.

This makes no sense. 過労死 is just a compound word basically consisting of "too much work death." Using your "they have a word for it so it's common and blithely ignored" logic, you could say that "infanticide" happens all the time and is ignored in English-speaking countries simply because there's a word for it.

Or the word "decimation". How often do we round up a group of people and kill every tenth?
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