Earlier quoted context omitted.
I was following you until your last sentence. I've never done concurrency in a FP language before, but I do know that writing it in Java makes it hard to get right.
What prevents you from implementing an actor/message passing system in Java? Erlang's core concept of concurrency seems like something that'd be better suited as a library and app server than a whole language and runtime. I've yet to hear of any Erlang-specific magic that cannot be implemented inside another language.
But what you can't (practically) implement yourself in other languages is all the professional care and maturity that have gone into the whole package over its long history. AFAICT, Erlang/OTP is much more than just a library.