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Defending my own brain against enshittification

mrmarket.lol

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Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#71

Post by cactacea »

askonomm wrote: post #64
coldpie wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For me, I take the bus to work, so my commute time is spent on pleasant things like reading library books, or working through Chinese lessons on my phone, or just looking out the window, or occasionally chatting with other commuters. I actually enjoy my commute, it's some nice time set aside entirely for myself each day. If I had to be stuck in a car for my commute, I'd definitely resent it.

Being in a disease-ridden tuna can that is often filled to the brim so you don't even get a seat is not exactly something that I would call pleasant. My friends who commute to work via public transport get sick multiple times per year, I don't.

I was constantly sick when I worked in downtown Seattle and rode the bus. I've been sick exactly once since I started WFH full time in 2019.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#72

Post by leawi »

phoghed wrote: post #21
mapontosevenths wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

AI music makes my head feel like I'm wearing noise cancelling headphones. That sort of weird 'pressure' sensation. It's as if even the silent bits are still pushing on my eardrums. I can spot it instantly and I hate it. Gemini speculated that it might have to do with the AI not mimicking the audios phase properly.

You’re hearing the wave form of the load-bearing emdash A web app for blind testing this would be an interesting project

"The load-bearing emdash" made me chuckle, thank you.

Not sure why you got downvoted, but I too think it would be interesting. I vaguely remember a story about it posted here a while ago.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#73

Post by exe34 »

BigTTYGothGF wrote: post #67
exe34 wrote: post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's interesting that the only way your wife will let you have some time to yourself is if you're spending it commuting.

There's small children involved, you have to coordinate that kind of thing.

Yes, and somehow commuting week after week is so much better than having a conversation with your wife. It's not like the kids just stop existing when you're commuting. The solution is there, but it can't be used unless you're suffering.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#74

Post by coldpie »

askonomm wrote: post #64
coldpie wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For me, I take the bus to work, so my commute time is spent on pleasant things like reading library books, or working through Chinese lessons on my phone, or just looking out the window, or occasionally chatting with other commuters. I actually enjoy my commute, it's some nice time set aside entirely for myself each day. If I had to be stuck in a car for my commute, I'd definitely resent it.

Being in a disease-ridden tuna can that is often filled to the brim so you don't even get a seat is not exactly something that I would call pleasant. My friends who commute to work via public transport get sick multiple times per year, I don't.

And 40,000 Americans die due to cars every year. Everything's got tradeoffs, I choose the one that makes me happy.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#75

Post by kccqzy »

askonomm wrote: post #2

I couldn't get over the amount of time lost to commuting. Not saying that OP is living their life wrong or anything, to each their own of course, but I prefer working from home precisely because of how much more _life_ I get to live as a result. The time most people spend commuting, I spend going on hikes with my dog in a forest or working out. For those who lack social activities as a result of working from home I s…

It’s not time lost to commuting. For some people, without the structure of a workday imposed by commuting, they devolve into doing other time-wasting activities. In fact the author said without this commute they would “be on my phone/on Reddit/read HN comments all day/etc.” From this light, a commute doesn’t cause any more time to be lost, but rather it restricts the amount of time lost to be the commute itself, rather than the entire workday. This is something I’m seen very often in people who are dissatisfied with WFH. They lose focus, lose the sense of time, and waste the entire day without the commute.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#76

Post by IAmBroom »

xyzelement wrote: post #16
askonomm wrote: post #2

I couldn't get over the amount of time lost to commuting. Not saying that OP is living their life wrong or anything, to each their own of course, but I prefer working from home precisely because of how much more _life_ I get to live as a result. The time most people spend commuting, I spend going on hikes with my dog in a forest or working out. For those who lack social activities as a result of working from home I s…

I would have agreed with this a few years ago but it's more nuanced than that. Commute time is built-in decompression time that can be very valuable. For example we have small kids and it's just not going to happen that I am going to tell my wife on a given morning or evening "take care of them while I go on a hike" or whatever. So on days they I decide to go to the office - I get about 2 hours (one hour each way) of…

> I think many dads that are my fellow commuters see the commute as a sort of sacred solo space that's hard to maintain otherwise

You said the quiet part out loud: During your commute you force your female partner to do more of the work tending kids and doing household chores.

I agree that many dads enjoy this privileged escape of parenting duties.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#77

Post by ButlerianJihad »

IAmBroom wrote: post #76
xyzelement wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would have agreed with this a few years ago but it's more nuanced than that. Commute time is built-in decompression time that can be very valuable. For example we have small kids and it's just not going to happen that I am going to tell my wife on a given morning or evening "take care of them while I go on a hike" or whatever. So on days they I decide to go to the office - I get about 2 hours (one hour each way) of…

> I think many dads that are my fellow commuters see the commute as a sort of sacred solo space that's hard to maintain otherwise You said the quiet part out loud: During your commute you force your female partner to do more of the work tending kids and doing household chores. I agree that many dads enjoy this privileged escape of parenting duties.

Come on! Who is forcing whom here? Women traditionally bear many child-rearing duties and it's the "unemployed" spouse, whatever their sex, who stays at home to do household chores, and that's the way it is.

If anyone's forcing anyone, it's the employer and "the system" that conspire to force people into cars and onto the road for far too much of the workday. I didn't have children, but when I lived with family, friends, or significant other, I felt robbed. I felt robbed by my career because the commute was unpaid time, off-the-clock, where I was denied the time to be present, at home, with my loved ones, or doing chores, or hobbies. So, I was robbed; I wasn't forcing my girlfriend to cook or clean or be alone. I didn't have the agency to make that decision: it is made for me and all men like me.

When I drove a car, at least the commute was as fast as possible. When I ride public transit on a commute, the times become ungodly, and they truly eat away at your unpaid free time! At least public transit costs pennies compared to maintaining and driving a car!

Wives and mothers deserve some alone-time. It's incumbent on the husband to carve this out so that she doesn't burn out. It's incumbent on fathers to make time, quality time, for their children. But it's even more incumbent on these couples to earn money, do chores, and put in the work for raising their children. That's why we've got schools, because they step in and do the childcare, in loco parentis, and hopefully children have extended families that also participate in those duties.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#78

Post by anon84873628 »

jurgenburgen wrote: post #63
xyzelement wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would have agreed with this a few years ago but it's more nuanced than that. Commute time is built-in decompression time that can be very valuable. For example we have small kids and it's just not going to happen that I am going to tell my wife on a given morning or evening "take care of them while I go on a hike" or whatever. So on days they I decide to go to the office - I get about 2 hours (one hour each way) of…

Does your wife get 2 hours per day to decompress?

Of course she should (at least a couple days a week).

And culture already seems to acknowledge and expect that. We have the trope of mom taking a long bubble bath, for example.

"Man time" is usually portrayed as something we allow begrudgingly, like when he goes to the pub with the guys, or to watch sports, or to play video games. I rarely see quiet personal time portrayed as something men need or deserve.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#79

Post by kccqzy »

ghaff wrote: post #56
Semkas wrote: post #24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think the quality of a commute is very different depending on whether it's by car or by train, since you can actually read / write / program / draw on a train. Obviously I'm still pretty glad when I get to work from home and sleep in a little and make some good coffee though.

I commuted into the city a few days a week for about 18 months quite a while back. I'd normally take the train unless I were doing something in the evening at which point the commuter rail timetable didn't work very well. Yes, it was better than driving but still wasn't that great. I had to catch the train at about 6:30 AM. And it was still a good 3 hours on the train any given day. Wasn't really very relaxing and I…

The point of a train commute isn’t to get more work done (that would be working extra hours for your employer). Instead it’s time for yourself to relax, away from work, family responsibilities, and all that. Find a good book, listen to some new music while not multitasking, daydream a bit, or get your HN fix.

Re: Defending my own brain against enshittification

#80

Post by xyzelement »

jurgenburgen wrote: post #63
xyzelement wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would have agreed with this a few years ago but it's more nuanced than that. Commute time is built-in decompression time that can be very valuable. For example we have small kids and it's just not going to happen that I am going to tell my wife on a given morning or evening "take care of them while I go on a hike" or whatever. So on days they I decide to go to the office - I get about 2 hours (one hour each way) of…

Does your wife get 2 hours per day to decompress?

Yes especially since she's gone par time at work. Why not?
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