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Men In Tech

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Re: Men In Tech

#71

Post by yummyfajitas »

TheSOB88 wrote: post #57
tomp wrote: post #42

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> You'd be surprised the shit women deal with. I'm not sure, but I think you're being too general. I'd rather state this: You'd be surprised by the shit *attractive* women have to deal with. And I 'm pretty sure that attractive men have to deal with the same kind of "shit". They just react to it differently. Edit: I expected the downvotes, but please reply, do you disagree with the stated facts (i.e. does you experie…

Attractive men DON'T have to deal with the same kind of shit, in general, because they are not a minority. They are not in a minority with social precedents to keep them down, which is what this article is all about. Institutionalized sexualization of women through teasing and joking is pretty common. This piece is trying to get you to where you try to understand what it's like. Most of us have wondered if our bulge…

Women don't have their chests looked at in fields where they aren't a minority?

Or is minority status merely a red herring?

Re: Men In Tech

#72

Post by JanezStupar »

xyzzyz wrote: post #49
kateray wrote: post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wait, so what's the point in taking you into a realm that's utterly absurd? I'm not sure that it helps men relate to women's experiences if it feels absurd....

The point is that it's absurd, but women actually deal with this kind of shit. Ridiculous, huh?

And men get beaten up in the streets for no reason way more than women.

Pretty absurd, but we deal with it.

Re: Men In Tech

#74

Post by JanezStupar »

scotty79 wrote: post #67

OP could make his statement much stronger if he wrote the whole piece from perspective of bit asexual straight man working in environment dominated by gay men who would introduce in daily worklife all kinds of innuendos often forgetting that protagonist is not interested in them and also not very interested in sexual layer of human interaction. I think the innate homophoby of the readers could help them to better und…

There is no need to be a slightly asexual man in gay men environment.

It is quite enough that you are a man in a mostly female environment. When a woman approaches you and you turn her down then strange shit starts happening.

Re: Men In Tech

#75

Post by yummyfajitas »

scotty79 wrote: post #67

OP could make his statement much stronger if he wrote the whole piece from perspective of bit asexual straight man working in environment dominated by gay men who would introduce in daily worklife all kinds of innuendos often forgetting that protagonist is not interested in them and also not very interested in sexual layer of human interaction. I think the innate homophoby of the readers could help them to better und…

Yes, lets read an article by a straight man about how the gays kept him out of the fashion industry by finding him attractive and behaving effeminately.

Then lets try to take it even half as seriously as articles about how those geeks keep women out of tech by finding them attractive and behaving nerdily.

Re: Men In Tech

#76

Post by JanezStupar »

kejmen wrote: post #51
tomp wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> When you ask men the same question [...] the answer is just about nothing. From my personal experience, men are much more vulnerable than women. A lot of my friends got assaulted/beaten up (me included) (some multiple times), and it's always been in public , either in clubs or even in broad daylight on a busy street ! As you stated above, women can protect themselves in very simple ways: stay with other people, and…

You sound like a jerk, that's why you and your jerk friends got beaten up. Why couldn't man and women protect themselves the same way? And WTF does it mean "women can protect themselves in very simple ways: stay with other people, and watch what you're eating."

You obviously never got assaulted by strangers for just passing by?

Re: Men In Tech

#77

Post by JanezStupar »

JoachimSchipper wrote: post #66
wamatt wrote: post #58

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Ok but why should we care? I mean it's not like men are raging about the lack of male orientated pregnancy articles. I don't get it. Tech is male orientated because there are much more males in it. It make sense to then align the reporting towards the base.

Think "you'd feel bad if this happened to you. By empathy, you should figure out that women feel bad if this happens to them."

I've had most of the events mentioned in the article happen to me, by women.

I was also labeled as gay in milieu for turning down a woman.

I was hit on by gay men in an extremely uncomfortable fashion more than once.

I was also assaulted by complete strangers for no reason at all.

I was also isolated and bullied by my schoolmates in kindergarten and primary school (boys and girls).

And if I go and complain about it I will be labeled as less than a man. So why should I care?

p.s.: Disclaimer. Since I grew big and strong enough to do it I also disallow any kind of improper behavior in my presence.

Re: Men In Tech

#78

Post by tomjen3 »

adrianhoward wrote: post #33
tomjen3 wrote: post #27

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's not exactly mens fault though. It is the fault of whomever creates the one in four women will be raped statistic (which is clearly bullshit). For any females reading this, while plenty of males will want to get into your pants very few males can stomach the idea of rape, so if you feel threatened seek other males. It doesn't matter much if you know them or not.

That's not exactly mens fault though. It is the fault of whomever creates the one in four women will be raped statistic (which is clearly bullshit). The 1/4 number in the USA that's usually quoted is for rape and attempted rape. For an explanation of where the 1/4 number came from in the US - read http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_statistics#United_States . I'd be interested in which part of the methodologies of the…

Best debunk I have read (the statistics start about halfway into the article):

http://owningyourshit.blogspot.com/2011/06/how-feminism-hate...

Note that the author is female and has been sexually assaulted (read attempted rape in a park).

Re: Men In Tech

#79

Post by ericabiz »

sasha-dv wrote: post #47

Just what women need! Another middle-aged white man fighting for the women's rights. It's condescending. It's just a step away from "A Gay Girl in Damascus".

Hi,

I have no idea if you are a woman or a man, but as a woman in tech, I feel compelled to reply.

I appreciated this story. Not so much the comments attached to it on HN, but the story itself. If it got some guys thinking about how they would feel if this happened:

"You don't look like a programmer! When did you get into computers? That's kinda hot..."

Which has happened to me so many times I've lost count...usually followed closely by "Are you single?"

If it gets guys to stop saying THAT...then it was well worth the whole thing.

Re: Men In Tech

#80

Post by yummyfajitas »

ericabiz wrote: post #79
sasha-dv wrote: post #47

Just what women need! Another middle-aged white man fighting for the women's rights. It's condescending. It's just a step away from "A Gay Girl in Damascus".

Hi, I have no idea if you are a woman or a man, but as a woman in tech, I feel compelled to reply. I appreciated this story. Not so much the comments attached to it on HN, but the story itself. If it got some guys thinking about how they would feel if this happened: "You don't look like a programmer! When did you get into computers? That's kinda hot..." Which has happened to me so many times I've lost count...usually…

Many people tell me I don't seem like a programmer, and quite a few are surprised to discover I went to college or do non-manual labor. There is just something about my personality that suggests to people I'm not a knowledge worker, unless the topic comes up in conversation.

They have heuristics, priors and reasoning which lead them to correct results most of the time. Maybe they are even irrational and have a sucky predictor.

I know how I feel about this - meh.

Incidentally, why do you feel that being found attractive is a problem? And is this also a problem in fields with 50% women?

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