71–80 of 205 posts
We’re probably going to be doing the whole combined finances soon, but if you have any financial relationship with any person or group, Splitwise is great for keeping the score.
I don't understand couples that keep separate finances. When you get married its "we" and not "me". It seems like keeping one foot out the door. Note: I've been married for 23 years with everything tracked in joint accounts the entire time but we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box.
Because joint accounts have always seemed weird and controlling to me? I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something. She can spend her money on whatever she wants. We split the bills according to our income (more or less) and discuss saving more when we know larger expenses like a trip or home improvements are on the horizon. I don’t need access to her checking accounts or credit cards b…
One does not necessitate the other.
We’ve been married since 2012. Her check went into “her” account and my check went into “my” account. I paid “my” bills out of my account and she paid “her” bills out of her account. I made so much more than her while she was working, I ended up putting money in her account to make up her spending money short fall.
We both have a zero based budget. After we pay our bills and put aside savings, we could each just look at our own accounts to see what we could spend until the next pay period.
She was mostly working for “her” spending money and provide stable health insurance working part time in the school system for the family while I job hopped rebuilding my career.
Then in 2020, I fell into my current $BigTech job and I didn’t want her to be in the school system because of a little world wide pandemic and I “retired” her.
Before that, we talked about how much she would need to be comfortable. That amount gets deposited into “her” account when I get paid.
While we talk about all of our long term goals and neither one of us make big purchases without talking to the other, what we do with our allowances there are no questions asked.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Because joint accounts have always seemed weird and controlling to me? I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something. She can spend her money on whatever she wants. We split the bills according to our income (more or less) and discuss saving more when we know larger expenses like a trip or home improvements are on the horizon. I don’t need access to her checking accounts or credit cards b…
You're thinking all the money of both people has to go in the same join account, but that's not the case. You can have a "for the bills" join account, and then each person has their own separate account. Every month each person transfer a certain amount to the joint account to cover the bills (50/50, 70/30, whatever split works for them). Any other money is spent in the person's own account and has nothing to do with…
That’s quite literally what the study is suggesting. All money in one account results in the most satisfaction.
https://academic.oup.com/view-large/402916029?guestAccessKey...
I don't understand couples that keep separate finances. When you get married its "we" and not "me". It seems like keeping one foot out the door. Note: I've been married for 23 years with everything tracked in joint accounts the entire time but we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box.
Because joint accounts have always seemed weird and controlling to me? I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something. She can spend her money on whatever she wants. We split the bills according to our income (more or less) and discuss saving more when we know larger expenses like a trip or home improvements are on the horizon. I don’t need access to her checking accounts or credit cards b…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Because joint accounts have always seemed weird and controlling to me? I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something. She can spend her money on whatever she wants. We split the bills according to our income (more or less) and discuss saving more when we know larger expenses like a trip or home improvements are on the horizon. I don’t need access to her checking accounts or credit cards b…
> I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something One does not necessitate the other.
I think this strongly depends on the couple. My wife and I have had separate checking accounts for 20 years, and a shared savings account, and a second shared checking account we use strictly for transferring money back and forth (we can’t use savings for that due to stupid banking rules). We also have split the hills according to our relative incomes. I make a lot more so I have the mortgage and a few big ticket ite…
Worked for us for almost 15 years.
I don't understand couples that keep separate finances. When you get married its "we" and not "me". It seems like keeping one foot out the door. Note: I've been married for 23 years with everything tracked in joint accounts the entire time but we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box.
Because joint accounts have always seemed weird and controlling to me? I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something. She can spend her money on whatever she wants. We split the bills according to our income (more or less) and discuss saving more when we know larger expenses like a trip or home improvements are on the horizon. I don’t need access to her checking accounts or credit cards b…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
> I don’t want my wife to have to “check in” when she wants to buy something One does not necessitate the other.
In theory, sure. In practice literally every person I know with singular checking accounts has to check in when making any purchase more expensive than a tank of gas and expect the same from their significant other.
I don't understand couples that keep separate finances. When you get married its "we" and not "me". It seems like keeping one foot out the door. Note: I've been married for 23 years with everything tracked in joint accounts the entire time but we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box.
My wife and I have all joint accounts so there aren’t any secrets. But I know what is in “my” account only changes based on what I spend and the same for hers.
Of course all of our savings accounts that can be joint are.