71–80 of 224 posts
Thank you for sharing. I can relate. This is my first “real” full time job, and I’ve now been there 10 years with little to show for it, and not for lack of trying. Software engineer for a small company, report directly to the owners. Repeatedly, I pour my heart and soul into a project that I believe in, only for ownership to trash the project for superficial reasons. I’ll do small things and get overly patronizing p…
Thanks for sharing. > Just doing nothing sounds awesome. It's not. It's crap. Yeah, this is something people don't realize until they're it in. It's not fun. Humans long to be needed. > but I didn't have the courage to jump This is one of those things I personally have trouble wrapping my head around, but I know it happens. Kudos for getting it done.
Sorry for sidetracking, but is "... until they're it in" idiomatic? Because I love the phrase, but I'm not a native speaker, and unable to coax google into clearing this up. Would you use this in written form only or when speaking too? (third opinions are also very welcome!)
After months of battle I finally was able to prove my case, the person got fired but at that point I had no motivation or energy to stay. I left for a different company and I don't miss that hellhole AT ALL.
I was really worried about compensation, optics etc... but life is too short to go through stuff like that for a job.
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True.
But also consider there are a class of people who suffer through things thinking "This is not that bad, right? Is this a normal experience"?. And especially an issue if they're isolated (which commonly causes depression), they lack normalcy around them reinforcing "Yes its that bad! That is not normal and you need help!"
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That is textbook constructive discharge, a type of wrongful termination. It consists in creating a hostile environment so that you are forced to quit. It is illegal. You have to document everything, create a solid case, then sue the company.
Just to put some details around this. You hire a lawyer, which will cost $2K-$3K. The lawyer helps you document everything. Then when you're ready to leave, the lawyer sends a demand letter to the company - demanding severance pay. The severance is something like 3-6 months of pay to bridge you to find another job. If you're making $100K and get 3 months severance, that's $25K - well worth it financially and for your…
You use it as fuck you money for your next job.
Yes: It is that easy to end up frog-in-a-pot. I've seen it, and I've done it. I've seen it nearly kill people and cause them to give up on careers. And this underlines what stress is all about: Not working hard, but spinning your wheels and going nowhere. It will make a mess out of you. And yeah, for whatever reasons the tech startup world can be ultra-nasty compared to everywhere else. The level of vindictive, nasty…
I know what I'm capable of, and when I compare it to what I've done lately, it just crushes my spirit.
Thank you for sharing. I can relate. This is my first “real” full time job, and I’ve now been there 10 years with little to show for it, and not for lack of trying. Software engineer for a small company, report directly to the owners. Repeatedly, I pour my heart and soul into a project that I believe in, only for ownership to trash the project for superficial reasons. I’ll do small things and get overly patronizing p…
I'm curious—do these business owners you work for have any software or management experience in tech? I've sometimes seen managers do this when they don't know what to do with an employee or don't know what career progression for an employee looks like.
This doesn't at all justify shitty behavior, but I've found it useful to identify motivations behind bad interactions as a way to avoid things that could lead to them in the future.