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Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

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Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#71

Post by the_only_law »

throwawayA666 wrote: post #28

I find women to be too shallow. But I don't feel anger towards women or feel upset about it, rather I devote my life to the things I enjoy doing.

I won’t paint with that broad of a brush, but I will say I find most people in general on dating apps to be boring and formulaic.

Not to say that they necessarily are, and to be fair, almost all dating app advice I’ve seen comes down to building a copy/paste format. I’ve seen a a few apps that seem entirely populated by people a certain “archetype” in my area.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#72

Post by jfengel »

mxschumacher wrote: post #32
staticman2 wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You have some odd ideas there. You might want to read The Moral Animal by Robert Wright for a more nuanced view of human nature by an evolutionary psychologist. (A field which is controversial at the best of times- but if you're going to believe something controversial but possibly true you can do a lot better than what you posted here) If I wasn't on my phone i'd type more, but in brief you have a weird idea of what…

The original statement isn't about women in general but the dynamics on dating apps for people under 30. I think we can agree that Tinder and others are more focused on physical attributes than the ability to finance and support the raising of children

Believe it or not, I don't agree.

There's a lot more to a Tinder photo than physical attributes. A picture, as they say, is worth a thousand words. A photo can convey a lot about your personality. What you're doing in the photo is a big clue. So is your emotional state. Just choosing a photo that's well composed and makes you look your best means a lot.

Tinder photos aren't mug shots for identification. You're not just comparing a person's physical features. Even the simple expedient of smiling will do you a lot of good. You'd be stunned at how many people (of both sexes) will choose a random grainy photo and slap it up there.

There's more to success on Tinder than a photo, but it's not the simple box-ticking of attractiveness that people make it out to be. A good photo gets you to the point where you can talk with somebody. Then your personality matters.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#73

Post by jfengel »

float4 wrote: post #39
throwawayA666 wrote: post #28

I find women to be too shallow. But I don't feel anger towards women or feel upset about it, rather I devote my life to the things I enjoy doing.

You should probably meet more/different women then. Or at the very least you should know that there are many women who are not shallow. The funny thing is that there are both: - communities of men who think women are shallow (they spend all their time on instagram, they only care about their looks and about how wealthy and good looking their partner is); - communities of women who think men are shallow (they only wan…

It's certainly not the case that women think all men are shallow, but any woman who has been on any dating app will tell you that she has met a lot of creeps. Men who open the conversation with "DTF?" are a daily occurrence.

There's a certain survivorship bias there: such men don't get removed from the market. Men genuinely seeking long term commitments, or even medium term ones, will often find them and leave.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#74

Post by themacguffinman »

tolbish wrote: post #70
themacguffinman wrote: post #69

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's just like your opinion, man. Not everyone values sexual relationships the same way you seem to. Aside from the example of the comment parent, Japan has an interesting cultural phenomenon of "herbivore men" characterized by a general indifference to marriage and committed relationships.

You're talking about something different then. The existence of tube sites should have no effect on people that already didn't care about sex and relationships. The point I responded to said that these sites are a main reason why certain men aren't pursuing sex.

No I'm talking about the same thing. Herbivore men don't care about marriage and committed relationships, that is different from not caring about their basic sexual needs which they do. As asexuality is not very common, they still need to satisfy basic biological impulses. Tube sites can replace sex as the primary way to satisfy sexual needs in the same way laptops replace desktops as the primary way to satisfy computing needs, or the way Soylent replaces cooked food as the primary way to satisfy hunger. Tube sites allow men who don't care about marriage and committed relationships to avoid pursuing sex through courtship & relationships the way their biology compels them to.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#75

Post by float4 »

jfengel wrote: post #73
float4 wrote: post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You should probably meet more/different women then. Or at the very least you should know that there are many women who are not shallow. The funny thing is that there are both: - communities of men who think women are shallow (they spend all their time on instagram, they only care about their looks and about how wealthy and good looking their partner is); - communities of women who think men are shallow (they only wan…

It's certainly not the case that women think all men are shallow, but any woman who has been on any dating app will tell you that she has met a lot of creeps. Men who open the conversation with "DTF?" are a daily occurrence. There's a certain survivorship bias there: such men don't get removed from the market. Men genuinely seeking long term commitments, or even medium term ones, will often find them and leave.

> It's certainly not the case that women think all men are shallow

Some women do do. That was the one and only point of my comment: to show that there are both men and women who fall prey to the exact same inductive fallacy.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#77

Post by SpelingBeeChamp »

aidenn0 wrote: post #19
adflux wrote: post #6

Fewer men are having sex with about an equal amount of women. So there are a few men who statistically have the most sex and then the rest barely gets any. Tinder and the like very heavily favor attractive men. Then there's a whole bunch (like in my compsci major) who don't even talk to women on a daily basis... https://m.imgur.com/L9Vu4Zo graphs like this dont inspire hope either and serve to support my previous poi…

Don't forget the other big chart OKCupid posted which was how few men are willing to have date even slightly older women. There are more women in their 20s having sex with men in their 30s, than men in their 20s having sex with women in their 30s. In most states it's not legal to have sex with women under 18, so (assuming serial monogamy) at any given time there just aren't enough women that are younger than a 20-som…

In most states the age of consent is 16, not 18.

(31 states vs. 13 states; the remaining six set their age of consent at 17.)

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