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Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

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Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#71
post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

Agreed. Just turned 22 this past October. I had a very similar experience in that I couldn't go somewhere unless my mother had met their parents (which rarely happened) and like yourself I was hooked to my tech. It has payed dividends career wise but I didn't get to be too social growing up.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#72

I wonder why the "young adult nightlife experience" feels so stagnant. I like going to the occasional upscale cocktail bar, but in general spending Friday or Saturday night in a crowded bar or club is not my idea of a fun thing to do. What is the alternative for more introverted people? Stay home? I went to Copenhagen recently and on a Friday night came across a big coffee/beer+wine place with lots of tables/sofas th…

i feel this. (in SF.) i think it's extra bad here in SF because most people have really small apts, so not great for getting a group together at a house. end up in kinda-shitty over-priced bars. meh.

(there's probably cooler places/things going on and i just haven't discovered them. maybe?)

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#73
post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time?

Asking as a parent with three young kids who's seeing practically no benefit to ubiquitous screens at this point, and lots of bad things about them, and trying to figure out how to navigate this brave new world while screwing these kids up as little as possible.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#74
post #13

I am a total introvert and some of my happiest high school memories involve friends pushing me to go to giant parties that pushed me out of my comfort zone. I would say that there are moments in there which are integral to who I am as a person. I really feel like they’re missing out on a developmental milestone. I almost feel like these kids are brainwashed but that’s probably just me looking in as an outsider. I am…

> I really feel like they’re missing out on a developmental milestone. Are they though? Those milestones can take many different forms, as evidenced by the fact that "giant parties" are a relatively recent phenomenon, historically speaking.

>as evidenced by the fact that "giant parties" are a relatively recent phenomenon, historically speaking.

That is nowhere near true.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#75

I wonder why the "young adult nightlife experience" feels so stagnant. I like going to the occasional upscale cocktail bar, but in general spending Friday or Saturday night in a crowded bar or club is not my idea of a fun thing to do. What is the alternative for more introverted people? Stay home? I went to Copenhagen recently and on a Friday night came across a big coffee/beer+wine place with lots of tables/sofas th…

18-21 seems alive and well in the UK but we do have a very odd night life drinking culture. I found once people get to their 3rd and 4th years of university they can see "Real life" on the horizon and the awful 3am kebab shop behavior largely stops. Like you've described pub culture is quite popular for the 25-40 bracket. Somewhere you can meet and socialise which is like being at home without pounding music and £8 d…

As an American who lived in London from age 34-37, I loved the pub culture because it allows one to get outside and have a couple drinks with colleagues at a reasonable hour and still be home for dinner with the family. Also, cask ale much easier on my stomach than super cold and carbonated lagers.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#76
post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

I’m reminded of the under-25-set reacting to the Stranger Things children just sort of running around unsupervised as “unrealistic.” Nope, that was how we rolled.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#77

I understand it to a degree. I've personally never liked partying; hated the music and the culture around alcohol and only did it in order to get girls. There are more efficient ways today.

I think you're on to something. That was the only point of going out for me too. Occasionally, I'd just want to get hammered and goof off with my friends, but we could do that at home. Most of the time, it was to chase girls.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#78
post #73
post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time? Asking as a parent with three young kid…

I can say this: you aren't alone! I'm in the exact same boat. Ironically, if we can coordinate those of us who "get it" on this issue, maybe we can organize at least some spaces and communities where kids can interact free of screens and have friends etc.

About the most important org any parent should know about and support: http://commercialfreechildhood.org/

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#79
post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

Also somewhat anecdotal, but in Japan kids are given freedom to the other extreme [1].

[1] https://www.citylab.com/transportation/2015/09/why-are-littl...

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#80
Frankly this is totally case by case. I’m 22 and have been partying hard since 15. Simultaneous to that my career hasn’t been a distraction or a replacement. It would make sense that the support on a developer driven channel like Hacker News would sway the kids who hang inside more. I promise you HN, kids are partying hard.
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