Earlier quoted context omitted.
As a maintainer, it is his choice which patches to accept. If you're not happy with his decisions, choose another project, fork it, or pay someone to do it for you.
Sure, but once you’ve forked, now you have a fork only you use, but which you know is more secure than its upstream for reason X. That’s an unstable equilibrium—you want others to know of your fork, and to switch to it, so that other downstream projects can also be more secure. Adding to this, you might still transitively depend on the upstream through your other deps in ways you can’t change without either forking a…
Or you can pay the cost of bringing in changes from the upstream project. This happens a lot for commercial software. I remember having to maintain a “fork” of BEA’s WebLogic server for a year or two until they incorporated changes my employer needs.
It’s not so bad.