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This is a teenager

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Re: This is a teenager

#631

Post by perfectritone »

maxerickson wrote: post #363
imacomputertoo wrote: post #209

The conclusion of this data presentation is that so of these people are our collective responsibility, and I just wasn't convinced. I wish they had shown percentages with the visualization. They choose not to. I was underwhelmed by some points that seemed like they should have been more shocking. Look at the huge number of people in the many adverse experiences category who made it to college, and make a high salary.…

And, critically, how much are we willing to collectively sacrifice to move that percentage of people in a positive direction? This begs the question, at least to some extent. A big lesson of modern economics is that lots of things are win-win. For example, if you could eliminate years spent in prison by spending more on K-12 education, that looks like a big sacrifice if you don't have the prison counterfactual to com…

Unfortunately it's not all economics. The prison system in the US exerts its power on the population using fear. The goal is to have a certain amount of people in prison, not to save money by getting them out. There are myriad ways to achieve reducing the prison population if that was the goal.

Re: This is a teenager

#632

Post by makeitdouble »

sabarn01 wrote: post #456
Red_Leaves_Flyy wrote: post #437

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The point is, likely intentionally, understated. I cannot speak for the author, but the gist I got is that our society thrusts wholly unprepared people into adulthood and we could get a lot of improvements from just making it harder for people to fail at adulting. IYKYK and if you don’t you will get fucked - repeatedly. Basic life skills are not taught so it’s up to the individual if their family fails. Importantly,…

The outcome of this has been to make it harder to fail as a kid. We don't hold kids back anymore and we don't suspend kids anymore. At some point in time the rubber meets the road and you will be held accountable and have to be. We could improve the social safety net but we never want to match other countries that have more supervision of their at risk population. When I worked temp jobs there wasn't a place I worked…

Answering:

> I’m talking about stuff like navigating health insurance, paying taxes, budgeting, managing credit, home maintenance, vehicle care.

With:

> We don't hold kids back anymore and we don't suspend kids anymore

is a truely weird logic to me. Is it related ? Or are you offering to let kids get credit lines and suspend them over their mismanagement ?

That could actually be a great idea TBH. And while we're at it, adults could also get suspended or have to attend additional courses, instead of getting thrown into debt spirals.

Re: This is a teenager

#633

Post by llm_trw »

Red_Leaves_Flyy wrote: post #606
batshit_beaver wrote: post #487

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The outcome of this has been to make it harder to fail as a kid. I'd like to go a little further and suggest that more recently there's been a trend of not holding the adults accountable either. Instead of trying to improve outcomes for all, we seem to have decided to choose the path of collective failure.

When do the greater communities need to pay their dues? Schools cost money to run but taxpayers balk and cry over every cent increase. There are crumbling schools with toxic air and water that lack adequate HVAC paying their teachers unlivable salaries. This is the result of neglect to preserve and invest which is a condemnation of those who allowed such neglect on their watch when they should have championed such pl…

Schools in the US cost more than schools in any other developed nation.

Every institution in the US has been taken over by careerists and credentialists who produce nothing of value and are a drain on the system.

For a simple example in our area look at twitter: we were told the servers would catch fire, the end times will be upon us and cats will live with dogs. Instead the servers kept chugging along just as well as they did before with a 20th the staff.

At this point everything is so bad I'd support sortition for every public managerial position. You can't do worse than what we have today.

Re: This is a teenager

#634

Post by kylehotchkiss »

the_af wrote: post #610
kylehotchkiss wrote: post #567

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Rather than looking at USA as Scandinavian county, imagine living in some of the counties in the global south. The competition for good jobs is so intense that you’ll work 10 hours a day, 6 days a week. You won’t miss work if you’re sick or have a family event because then somebody else gets your job. Culturally second chances don’t exist, and you’re the only chance your children have to get through school (because y…

Which countries in the "global south" are you talking about? I live in South America and life is not like this. Like, nothing at all like this; you might as well be describing Narnia or Middle Earth and it would sound just as fantastical. Just as some examples: Doctors are quite good here, none of that untrained nonsense you mentioned. You have safety nets. If you work formally employed (which granted is not a minor…

I am referring to the "global south" as in the UN definition, which is probably a little dated and could use a revisit (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Global_North_and_Global_South) Much of these observations from spending a few years living in Southeast Asia. I've been to the untrained doctors. Watched them practice with unclean tools (did not accept care...). The vast majority of people will never achieve formal employment.

Re: This is a teenager

#635

Post by stkdump »

l0c0b0x wrote: post #519

I was Alex (my name is not Alex). Graduated high school in 97, but with a 2.1 GPA (yeah, pretty bad). Went to community college while working part time, living in a 'separated' household (mom/dad did the splits), supported both my parents both emotionally and financially (as much as I could) through their transition and new living arrangements. We were all immigrants, and still learning the ropes in this wonderful co…

That is great to read and I genuinely believe everyone with such adverse experiences will be better off if they lived their life with this attitude. It is also a healthy attitude to focus on what one can control, which is how they choose to think of their situation and act in it.

We should not forget though that at the same time the system in place will also produce people that face live with the same attitude and do all the same things, but with much less success.

Now the big question is, if we can have a system that does a similar job in encouraging your type of attitude while at the same time helping those out better, for whom it doesn't work out as much. Or are these things mutually exclusive.

There is a guy who cofounded a successful company and sold it. When asked if he would retire, his answer is no. Not because he isn't ready for retirement. Not because he wants to continue working or be even more successful. Because he has kids to put through college. Even successful people are not free of financial worry.

I wonder if all this success if fueled by constant adrenaline, no matter if it helps the individual or not. And if yes, if there is a better way.

Re: This is a teenager

#636

Post by brailsafe »

noisy_boy wrote: post #581
brailsafe wrote: post #568

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Up front, I have no intention of trying to detract from any of those accomplishments, because you've obviously been grinding pretty hard for a while and admire the tenacity you must have had as a kid and the progression you've seemed to follow. I do however find it under-discussed how many subsequent dice rolls have to at least partially work out for that tenacity, and those little shifts, to be a compounding positiv…

> My last job title was Software Engineer II, but really I'm just a generalist that keeps failing upward, and I don't know whether if I were to double-down and specialize more, go deeper, or pivot out completely, I'd be able to do that well; it's a bit of a constant existential crisis. As a generalist that still has the title Software Engineer after over 25 years of experience, I think I am able to empathize. I think…

Well, I have and can do those things, and agree that those are very valuable skills to be proud of. I've just been kind of frontend only in team settings in a professional capacity lately, so it's something I'll be continuing to improve on.

Most of my work has been jumping into some crazy existing codebase and figuring out how to understand and contribute to it, so greenfield buildouts are just not something I've repped out, and think that's a bit of a weakness. As in, I can set up a database, build an API, wrangle a vps, and then build the front-end, but I don't really have much of a sense of how to do it quickly or by using decoupled cloud service providers, simply because I've never been in that position. Laying the pipes is sort of the essense of productive software engineering in my mind.

It is quite gratifying though to gradually be working my way to understanding how each layer of the hardware software stack work, and I'm starting to see those layers in real-world contexts, such as in getting a fault when compiling Swift, it'll show me the lower levels where the problem occured.

Re: This is a teenager

#637

Post by acjohnson55 »

The format is very creative and technically impressive. I don't want to launch into criticisms without acknowledging that.

However, I find myself underwhelmed, for a few reasons.

- It's hard to compare the different cohorts, because of the different widths.

- The definition of "adverse experiences" seems too limited in scope of what's counted, leading to small numbers and small differentiation between the cohorts.

- The biggest difference appears to be "no adverse experiences" vs everyone else, but I think the narrative describes other things.

- Somehow, the viceral differences in experience between folks who come from healthy, happy, wealthy families and those that don't feel kind of flattened.

I'm deeply concerned for social justice and equity of opportunities. I'm sure the underlying research of this longitudinal study is fascinating. I just think that the execution of this summary misses the mark a bit.

Re: This is a teenager

#638

Post by anotheruser13 »

kulahan wrote: post #421
subpixel wrote: post #6

Positive relationships with adults is shown to be means of counteracting adverse childhood experiences. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8237477/ I volunteer in a local school. It's not always fun, but something has to change.

How do you volunteer at the local school? My wife and I are both passionate about and interested in improving children’s lives, but not super sure how best to do it outside of donations and big brother big sister-type programs. As an aside, maybe it’s because I’m inexperienced, but I’m finding it surprisingly hard to get connected with a group to help people that isn’t a highly specific cause like religion, LGBTQ, ch…

I would like to volunteer as well, but it would have to be outside of home and school since I live in Texas. I would like to help young people learn to cope with being LGBTQ+, ADD, and other things, but I don't think parents would appreciate it.

Re: This is a teenager

#639

Post by matteoraso »

unobatbayar wrote: post #553

I'd like to share some of my experiences on this topic. Growing up, I faced several adversities. My parents divorced when I was young, and I lived with my mother until the age of 13. Unfortunately, my mother struggled with alcoholism, often bringing friends over, even during my early school years. However, in hindsight, I believe she deeply missed my father and coped with her pain through drinking. Despite her strugg…

>In conclusion, I might have been an unlikable and unlovable brat

Sounds like self-blame to me. No matter how you act, getting your bones broken isn't something that you deserve, ever.

Re: This is a teenager

#640

Post by usefulcat »

petesergeant wrote: post #570
Ozzie_osman wrote: post #556

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is a very, very big difference.

It is, although it disproportionately affects people who are poor but not broke. If you’re truly broke, there’s Medicaid, if you’re old there’s Medicare, 4% by some form of military healthcare, many people covered by their employers, and so on. 90% of Americans are insured. As a Britisher, obviously I’m in favour of universal healthcare, and I think the US system would benefit from it. But let’s not pretend it’s perf…

> 90% of Americans are insured

I'm one of those 90%. My health insurance (family of 4) costs more than my house payment, and the annual deductible is over $6000 (for one person). Either the premiums or my deductible goes up every year. In terms of total cost (monthly premiums plus annual deductible) it's also pretty much the least expensive plan that I can get.

It's not that health care here is bad, it's that it's ridiculously expensive compared to most other places in the world.

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