Funnily, "interesting" is one of those characteristics that follow the "there's nothing less X than someone who wants to seem X". Along with "cool", "manly" and probably dozen others.
How to stop being boring
61–70 of 116 posts
Re: How to stop being boring
#62Sick personal site
Re: How to stop being boring
#63> They're saying what they actually think and wearing what they actually like, pursuing hobbies that genuinely fascinate them, regardless of whether those hobbies are cool. Joke's on you, OP - even being like that you'll still find people who think you're boring because it's subjective. Truth is, once youth passes, over time people become increasingly disinterested in others. This effect was exacerbated by the recent…
"... over time people become increasingly disinterested in others." The average person perhaps. I find as I get older that people become more fascinating to me. Maybe I've just gotten better at listening and identifying interesting things about them.
Would agree wholeheartedly with this. Once you drill down into a person, you will eventually find an aspect of them that approaches life in a way you do not, and in a way which increases your appreciation for the depth of human experience if you listen closely enough. The signals the author are clued in on here are superficial to me. Idiosyncratic consumptions, a controversial political take or two? Sure, those can tickle one's curiosity, but they are only entrances to possible points of uniqueness and can be easily faked. Obviously you can't know everyone, nor should you want to, so these are just proxies the author uses to find people they want to spend their limited time with rather than in my opinion actual "not-boring" people.
Re: How to stop being boring
#64I'd lump this in with so much other inspirational advice (e.g. "Dance like nobody is watching! Love like you've never been hurt!") that is well-intended but hugely impractical. I think there are finely-tuned social algorithms that we innately follow. For example when meeting somebody we often perform the progressive self-disclosure algorithm in an attempt to find mutual talking points, so maybe yeah you say that you'…
My wife and I live above a bar frequented by tourists and the bartender is a friend of mine. When it isn’t busy, I’ll usually go down there order a soda and just talk to whoever shows up. The easy opener once the conversation starts is “what keeps you busy?” and keep the conversation going. This lets them talk about work, family, hobbies or whatever else they like to talk about I read a book that said you should try…
> I read a book that said you should try something new to you at least every quarter if not more often. It gives you something to talk about.
Any chance you remember the name?
Re: How to stop being boring
#65I'd lump this in with so much other inspirational advice (e.g. "Dance like nobody is watching! Love like you've never been hurt!") that is well-intended but hugely impractical. I think there are finely-tuned social algorithms that we innately follow. For example when meeting somebody we often perform the progressive self-disclosure algorithm in an attempt to find mutual talking points, so maybe yeah you say that you'…
People say things like this but I remember a time when there was a lot more "acceptable" eccentricity. I'm only in my late 40s so it wasn't too long ago.
The article misses the other half of being interesting: being interested. If you're not able to find your counterpart interesting, they'll find you boring.
Re: How to stop being boring
#66I hide my hobbies because I think they're pretty cringe (mushroom picking, making kombucha, among others) but when people find out they're always interested and want to learn more, or at least they act that way.
How is any of those hobby even remotely cringe? I honestly don't understand.
Tiktokking for attention as a job is cringe but making stuff like we did for eons cannot possibly be.
Re: How to stop being boring
#67I was in a group conversation last week where everyone was discussing what sophisticated new TV shows they were watching. When it got to me I said, “My family is really into Sabrina the Teenage Witch right now. It holds up really well and Salem the cat is absolutely hysterical.” The look I got was hilarious.
Re: How to stop being boring
#68Earlier quoted context omitted.
When you put it that way; I guess after some reflection, I realize my algorithm is optimized for efficiency and I immediately try to hone in on strong agreements or disagreements in taste/politics/etc. so that I don't waste my time getting to know a shitty person, or miss out on a potential best friend. These means engaging in a level of provocative speech/behavior that sometimes makes people uncomfortable (not my pr…
If I meet somebody that immediately skips the progressive self-disclosure small talk and jumps right in to a big discussion… I’m going to withdraw. Even if I agree with everything you’re saying, it comes off as aggressive. like youre trying to speed run forming a relationship by skipping the small talk
No, I'm just not going to progressively disclose my nature. I'm just going to be myself, regardless of how others in my environment might react.
I can field the small talk, several of my friends have commented on my ability to break the ice quickly with strangers. But after a minute or two, the conversation is either over or we're moving onto more interesting discussions.
Come to one of the conservative towns I grew up in and you'll understand the need for such a mentality. Progressive disclosure can lead to things like accepting racism, sexism and other injustices.
It's a good mentality to carry forth into other environments as well, because at the end of the day, the less masks I have to carry, the better.
Re: How to stop being boring
#69The "polarizing" bit has some truth to it but unfortunately this year I think people will see it in this frame
https://jacobin.com/2026/02/hyperpolitics-jager-institutions...
Lately I've been "going out-as-a-fox" to get smiles from people when I do street photography. As-a-fox I never push on a string but somehow I wind up being approached by several people a day who I had out "tokens" to that link to my photography. It started out when I realized I could get away with wearing an animal ear hood in public rather than an animal ear headband and at first I looked at it from the frame of character acting -- I started doing photography as-a-fox because I do photography all the time, but when I was forced to explain what I was doing I developed "foxographer" as a cover story but getting the role made it all real, even when I do a shabby job of my adjustments I am finding that people in my environment believe in my character and I'm developing a number of self-working routines that make the whole thing easy.
I've been interested in developing charisma and related subjects for a long time and this character breaks the assumptions I've made all this time (this is the first one who doesn't try to stand taller than I do!) but it puts a zero on the right side of all my KPIs.
Re: How to stop being boring
#70I hide my hobbies because I think they're pretty cringe (mushroom picking, making kombucha, among others) but when people find out they're always interested and want to learn more, or at least they act that way.
How is any of those hobby even remotely cringe? I honestly don't understand. Tiktokking for attention as a job is cringe but making stuff like we did for eons cannot possibly be.
Well both of them require near-autistic levels of attention to detail and knowledge. I used to be a scientist and so having a lab book to track different kombucha experiments satisfies that need, and detailed knowledge is obviously required for mushroom picking (and subsequent eating)