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Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

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Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#61

Post by tech_ken »

> He thought that every mischance in life was an opportunity to behave well, every mischance in life was an opportunity to learn something, and your duty was not to be submerged in self-pity but to utilize the terrible blow in a constructive fashion.

Feeling like a victim is not the same as wallowing in self-pity. Recognizing that you have been victimized in some way could easily be the first step towards taking ownership of your own circumstances and pushing for their improvement. Moreover, if you are being actively victimized it's probably not healthy in the long-term to pretend like it's "your fault", you're just going to make yourself crazy that way. Taking a clear view of the causes of your current circumstances is the only way you can act effectively, even if those causes are outside your locus of control. Playing these weird heuristic games to avoid "victim mentality" is just as deluded as drowning in "poor me".

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#63

Post by boeingUH60 »

bmitc wrote: post #20
megaman821 wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

He is sharing what worked for him. Sorry it does not conform to your world view.

It's not my world view. I prefer to listen to professionals.

How much do you pay them to tell you that?

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#64

Post by BirAdam »

jjoonathan wrote: post #34

This is true. It is also true that dispensing this particular advice is self-serving for people in power. In a revolution, things get worse before they get better if they get better. Revolutions come at huge negative expected value. However, appeasing powerful forces can also have hugely negative expected value. Sometimes the calculus makes sense, and when it does, you should hope that people are appropriately discou…

Eh, a revolution happens when people take responsibility and do something. Tyranny happens when people behave as and think like victims.

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#65

Post by dexwiz »

profsummergig wrote: post #23

Charlie Munger had great advice in general. And I've learned a lot of good from him. But I will never get over the hypocrisy of owning a quarter of Coca Cola and constantly criticizing Americans for being overweight (he used words like "sloth").

He sponsored what essentially was a prison style dorm. He might have great advice, but it will probably make you a worse human.

https://www.fastcompany.com/90740511/heres-what-its-like-liv...

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#66

Post by needadvicebadly »

oh_sigh wrote: post #43
profsummergig wrote: post #23

Charlie Munger had great advice in general. And I've learned a lot of good from him. But I will never get over the hypocrisy of owning a quarter of Coca Cola and constantly criticizing Americans for being overweight (he used words like "sloth").

Why? For the most part, people are overweight by choice, not by some unavoidable draw of Coke. Not to mention that they have a ton of zero or low calorie coke options that people could choose.

Many people are overweight by choice in the same way alcoholics or crack addicts are addicted to substances by choice. There are very powerful chemical and subconscious factors at play that make it incredibly difficult to exercise one's will. That semiglutides are proving to be remarkably effective at helping people both make better dietary decisions as well as reduce substance use, should tell you that the problem isn't as simplistic as you've made it out to be.

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#67

Post by kmeisthax »

lordnacho wrote: post #22

He passed away earlier today, which is I guess why this is here. He's got a point, too. To be a victim is to be helpless, and if you can choose to not see yourself that way, you can at least have some power back.

This only applies to a very small subset of victims who have the means to individually recover what has been taken from them. If you don't actually have the ability to do so, then pretending that you aren't a victim is just refusing to acknowledge reality. Awfully convenient for the person who put you in this situation.

The reason why people 'choose' to be victims is that it allows collective organization against the thing that has victimized them. This is not helplessness, this is taking power back.

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#69

Post by plufz »

oh_sigh wrote: post #43
profsummergig wrote: post #23

Charlie Munger had great advice in general. And I've learned a lot of good from him. But I will never get over the hypocrisy of owning a quarter of Coca Cola and constantly criticizing Americans for being overweight (he used words like "sloth").

Why? For the most part, people are overweight by choice, not by some unavoidable draw of Coke. Not to mention that they have a ton of zero or low calorie coke options that people could choose.

Making sugary caffeinated beverages supported by billions in ads sure seems like a method to try to affect peoples choice though.

Re: Charlie Munger – Feeling Like a Victim Is Perfectly Disastrous

#70

Post by jay-barronville »

I love it. Without even knowing about this particular quote, this has been my standard for myself for some years now. The “it’s always your fault” concept is scary to some folks—and I understand why—but it’s changed my life since I adopted it years ago.

Generally speaking, my framework is:

1. I’m NOT a victim.

2. I accept that everything that happens in my life is my fault.

3. I control the controllables; I can’t fix what I can’t control.

4. I must be a problem solver rather than a complainer.

5. Whatever happens in life, I give myself a cap of 48 hours to get over it—this includes being sad, grieving, being unproductive, etc.

I have a few more points in my framework, but these are the key ones.

Now, I want to be clear that you can, in fact, be a victim and things can happen in your life that isn’t your fault, which makes #3 seem a bit contradictory. But if you’re thinking like this, you’re missing the point.

The point is to have a framework that allows you to progress in life without allowing room for excuses.

When my wife first started dating me, she was skeptical of my framework—she said it seemed a bit too robotic. As we’ve gone through stuff life has thrown at us and she watches me fight through it all without ever curling up in a ball, she’s fully on board now.

I say all of this to say: Take control of your life. You can do it and it works.

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