Getting Out of a Rut • Hacker News Board

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#61

Post by mfashby » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:11 PM UTC

> Losing the ability to relax and the feeling of self-control, over-indulging in endless feeds of videos, games and services that further drain the energy that I so crave to return. To a point where it feels more like an addiction, with my body now responding with physical discomforts and a relapse of anxiety that I have not felt for years.

This is the core problem in Stolen Focus by Johann Hari, probably a bunch of other books too. It's an unfair fight: you vs the behemoth companies that produce the addictive feeds. Worth a read IMO

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#62

Post by robg » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:12 PM UTC

dQw4w9WgXcQ wrote: post #39

As someone in a "rut" recently, one of the things I realized was I needed to stop telling myself the story that I'm in a rut, because describing it as a "rut" focuses on a lot of externals I can't control. When you get a flat tire you can catastrophically repeat over and over to yourself that "I've got a flat!" and point at it and run circles around the car and wonder what you're going to do and "omg I've got a flat…

This. Right. Here.

Struggling with anxiety and depression for 20+ years, I find little activities help show my brain I’m not in a rut, I’m finding progress every day. Start with good sleep to refresh yourself, better nutrition to power your body, daily exercise to burn off stress and being mindful of the little moments. Having those four wheels spinning is needed for daily traction.

And now as a Dad, those little activities involve making pancakes or pushing a swing. Hard to see the rut when your kid is smiling back. Prioritize that time with them, it goes fast!

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#63

Post by _3u10 » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:12 PM UTC

Pay someone to clean your apartment. Fix your relationship or end it.

Decide you’re just never doing whatever you are procrastinating about. Let them know you’re not doing it.

Take a vacation. Do nothing.

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#64

Post by stevofolife » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:14 PM UTC

It’s just an excuse that you’ve created or found for yourself. One is able to do something right now regardless of what happened in the past. Drop the excuse and you will see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Edit: And once you see the light, don’t look back. Just keep going. It’s an adventure.

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#65

Post by profstasiak » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:16 PM UTC

stop eating processed food especially ultra processed food. It cleared my brain fog

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#66

Post by PKop » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:26 PM UTC

Lift weights and get sunlight and vitamin D, which will boost energy and testosterone, and thus motivation. If you're not doing the physical/health necessities as a baseline foundation, nothing else will work. Start there.

Good books to motivate drive for masculine purpose, including prioritizing the body instead of modern tendency to a sedentary isolation of the mind apart from the body:

Bronze Age Mindset by Bronze Age Pervert https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/40388177-bronze-age-m...

Sun and Steel by Yukio Mishima https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/62804.Sun_Steel

Goodluck

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#67

Post by aronowb14 » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:27 PM UTC

Therapy worked wonders for me.

Therapists are trained to help and give you custom things to do based on what you need. I found one that gave me a lot of structured “assignments” and questions to ask myself and I’ve never felt better than I do now.

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#68

Post by boruto » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:27 PM UTC

cyberdata wrote: post #43

Get physically active. You would need a LOT of energy to be around your son. I wish I was fitter when I became a father. That would have really helped. Once you get more energy, things will fall into place. So keep that as your first priority.

It gets progressively more physically demanding, Much more if the baby has health or other issues.

I used to get heavy migraine attacks, I could just shut myself in a room go to sleep and recuperate. Now I pop couple or even three ibuprofen to get by.

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#69

Post by swader999 » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:57 PM UTC

ctyc wrote: post #45

swader999 wrote: post #2

Start lifting

Strong second on this. It will feel like the last thing you want to do, but start lifting heavy stuff and be consistent. You will feel better, I promise.

It seems flippant in retrospect but I'm going through the very worst life experience imaginable right now and it's the only thing that helps me sleep.

Re: Getting Out of a Rut

#70

Post by soheil » Sat, Oct 22, 2022, 6:58 PM UTC

vidyesh wrote: post #57

Comevius wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's because it's complicated, your energy is the product of your physical, mental and social environment, including your body and mind. It's a resource that affected by your health as much as you perception and abilities, and in turn all of these affect each other, they are interconnected, and it's all a big jumble. Eat right, think right, move right is all you can do, but if you have an underlying condition, you we…

> simply just live in the 21st century with all of it's stresses All the listicles which talk about ways to replenish your energy talk about various healthy habits, and mostly psychological things which isn't possible in anyone who is struggling in this century or rich enough to delegate tasks and pass on the stressors. If we cannot effectively replenish energy or manage our energy, I wonder where does it leave us? A…

I think the key is delegation as you point out. Having to do things that are awful and have zero contribution should be avoided. For example calling a customer service line and jumping through 5 really stupid automated prompts to talk to a human being who you can barely understand is one of them.