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Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

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Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#61

Post by phobosanomaly »

staticman2 wrote: post #29
adflux wrote: post #6

Fewer men are having sex with about an equal amount of women. So there are a few men who statistically have the most sex and then the rest barely gets any. Tinder and the like very heavily favor attractive men. Then there's a whole bunch (like in my compsci major) who don't even talk to women on a daily basis... https://m.imgur.com/L9Vu4Zo graphs like this dont inspire hope either and serve to support my previous poi…

But women generally don't want to be part of harems. If they want something besides sex, they pretty much need to stop sharing a small group of attractive guys and start settling down with the less attractive guys. Perhaps tinder is not the place to find a guy for settling down.

They might not know that they're part of a harem if they're struck by the man's good looks and there's asymmetric information.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#62

Post by phobosanomaly »

osacial wrote: post #35
adflux wrote: post #6

Fewer men are having sex with about an equal amount of women. So there are a few men who statistically have the most sex and then the rest barely gets any. Tinder and the like very heavily favor attractive men. Then there's a whole bunch (like in my compsci major) who don't even talk to women on a daily basis... https://m.imgur.com/L9Vu4Zo graphs like this dont inspire hope either and serve to support my previous poi…

What's with this idea, that all women are constantly having sex with somebody? And that they all want to share their partner so easily...

The implication of the data used to generate the graph that the article is focused on is that young females are having more sex than young males.

"Americans overall are having less sex than they used to. Young people, in particular young men, appear to be driving this trend."

"As per the chart below, the percentage of young women who hadn't had sex in the previous year increased as well, though not nearly as much as it did for men."

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#64

Post by phobosanomaly »

theodric wrote: post #9

I was in my 20s 8-18 years ago and despite any sort of stability or decent employment I was still sexually active with female partners. I had a smartphone before most people knew that was a possibility, and essentially unlimited porn. I don't get it. Birth control and condoms have been widely available for one billion years at this point. Doesn't anybody want personal contact, a relationship, etc.? Are people really…

> Birth control and condoms have been widely available for one billion years at this point.

Many, many women prefer not to use birth control (for a variety of reasons), and many men find that the decreased sensation from condoms doesn't make the experience worth all of the effort.

As a result, after going through a few pregnancy scares, sex may just not be worth the trouble. Especially if you're not past a threshold of attractiveness and have to put in a ton of effort to be able to have that sex in the first place.

If sex is going to wind up being only a marginally-pleasurable activity that requires an enormous amount of effort to secure and is accompanied by regular pregnancy scares, then why bother?

Fuck the species. Why not just smoke some week, sip a beer, and play videogames with your buddies (guys or gals)? Sounds like a much better way to spend an evening to me!

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#65

Post by tolbish »

themacguffinman wrote: post #56
tolbish wrote: post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, but why would you want to replace a partner with a tube site?

Because it can be more convenient. You could ask this about a lot of things. Why replace a powerful desktop with a laptop? Why replace vinyls/CDs with MP3s? Why drink Soylent instead of eating a meal? It's a trade-off that some people choose.

You can certainly ask that about a lot of things, in the context of commodities. Human companionship is hardly one of them.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#67

Post by jimmygrapes »

phobosanomaly wrote: post #60
theodric wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm curious why a relationship with another person isn't something you'd want to prioritize. What fills your hours, and moreover, what fills your mental needs to such an extent that it can override biological imperatives?

I mostly just fill my time with work and hobbies. The rest of the time I spend alone with myself. Doesn't fill the mental needs, but you just get better at suppressing them over the years. Would be nice to meet someone who shared my interests and take on life, but the only ones I've found don't find me particularly attractive or already got snatched up. And what's the point of starting a relationship with someone who…

I feel you. Something to consider though, regarding shared interests: I have found it more pleasing to learn about somebody else's interests rather than simply affirming my own. Eventually it tends towards each side learning to like the others interests, or at least be familiar with them.

The problem I see is the lack of genuine interest in many. I don't really think that (in general) "video games" or "the office" or "anime" are interests, unless it becomes either uncomfortably obsessive (negative) or creation (positive). Same can go for things like hiking, board games, partying... these are activities, not really interests. People seem afraid to expose what truly interests them even long into a relationship.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#68

Post by phobosanomaly »

jimmygrapes wrote: post #67
phobosanomaly wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I mostly just fill my time with work and hobbies. The rest of the time I spend alone with myself. Doesn't fill the mental needs, but you just get better at suppressing them over the years. Would be nice to meet someone who shared my interests and take on life, but the only ones I've found don't find me particularly attractive or already got snatched up. And what's the point of starting a relationship with someone who…

I feel you. Something to consider though, regarding shared interests: I have found it more pleasing to learn about somebody else's interests rather than simply affirming my own. Eventually it tends towards each side learning to like the others interests, or at least be familiar with them. The problem I see is the lack of genuine interest in many. I don't really think that (in general) "video games" or "the office" or…

Your point about interests is interesting.

What would you consider an interest that would catch your attention?

If hiking is an activity, then would the interest be 'getting outdoors.'

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#69

Post by themacguffinman »

tolbish wrote: post #65
themacguffinman wrote: post #56

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because it can be more convenient. You could ask this about a lot of things. Why replace a powerful desktop with a laptop? Why replace vinyls/CDs with MP3s? Why drink Soylent instead of eating a meal? It's a trade-off that some people choose.

You can certainly ask that about a lot of things, in the context of commodities. Human companionship is hardly one of them.

That's just like your opinion, man. Not everyone values sexual relationships the same way you seem to. Aside from the example of the comment parent, Japan has an interesting cultural phenomenon of "herbivore men" characterized by a general indifference to marriage and committed relationships.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#70

Post by tolbish »

themacguffinman wrote: post #69
tolbish wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You can certainly ask that about a lot of things, in the context of commodities. Human companionship is hardly one of them.

That's just like your opinion, man. Not everyone values sexual relationships the same way you seem to. Aside from the example of the comment parent, Japan has an interesting cultural phenomenon of "herbivore men" characterized by a general indifference to marriage and committed relationships.

You're talking about something different then. The existence of tube sites should have no effect on people that already didn't care about sex and relationships. The point I responded to said that these sites are a main reason why certain men aren't pursuing sex.
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