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What If You Could Do It All Over?

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Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#61

Post by JackFr »

imgabe wrote: post #48
sanderjd wrote: post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Talking about your job at parties is way down the list of reasons social status matters. It's a fair point that people shouldn't make all their decisions with status in mind, but it is also wrong to belittle it as a consideration.

What are some of the other reasons? Suppose you could make $500k/year either by being a cardiologist or by cleaning out septic tanks. What advantages does the $500k from cardiology get you that the $500k from cleaning septic tanks does not? (Aside from impressing people at parties)

There is a great quote from A defense lawyer in the HBO show “The Undoing”:

“You know, I should say up front that, in my experience, doctors tend to be assholes. The reason they tend to be assholes is because they get to be. They're doctors.”

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#62

Post by rayiner »

quickthrower2 wrote: post #17

It’s worth thinking about how we measure how “good” a life is and if that is superficial and too much influenced by fashion. For example the cliche is go travelling or get rich starting a business. “I raised kids” doesn’t have the same boastworthyness in a lot of circles, but arguably it’s more interesting. Or maybe not. What’s the life well lived metric?

The nice thing about a culture that exalts “I raised kids and they turned out well” as a “life well lived metric” is that its broadly accessible. You can be born below average in intelligence and creativity and still be a good dad or mom, participate in local civic organizations, etc.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#63

Post by TheCoelacanth »

runawaybottle wrote: post #54
phnofive wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think it may be on the lower end for a number of reasons which lead back to the low barrier to entry - there’s no need to pay your dues with a decade of schooling, in hundreds of thousands in tuition, and to professional associations, state boards of licensure, or both. However, there are crappy doctors and architects - just like there are famous software engineers. Prestige - outside the ingroup - is a function of…

It’s fundamentally disrespected by people at a core level. I’ll prove my point with the one question they always ask us versus any other profession, ‘what is it that you actually do at the company?’. I swear, I’d never think to ask this of anyone, doctors, lawyers, teachers, nurses, cops, literally, I can’t think of one profession that gets asked this, I’ll try again, pilots, chemists, diplomats, translators, artists…

I don't think I've ever been asked that by anyone other than my grandparents. Anyone under retirement age and reasonably well-educated knows what software development is or at least doesn't ask because they think it would make them look stupid not to know.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#64

Post by selimthegrim »

rayiner wrote: post #62
quickthrower2 wrote: post #17

It’s worth thinking about how we measure how “good” a life is and if that is superficial and too much influenced by fashion. For example the cliche is go travelling or get rich starting a business. “I raised kids” doesn’t have the same boastworthyness in a lot of circles, but arguably it’s more interesting. Or maybe not. What’s the life well lived metric?

The nice thing about a culture that exalts “I raised kids and they turned out well” as a “life well lived metric” is that its broadly accessible. You can be born below average in intelligence and creativity and still be a good dad or mom, participate in local civic organizations, etc.

What if your kids reject you and want nothing to do with you?

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#65

Post by indigochill »

quickthrower2 wrote: post #17

It’s worth thinking about how we measure how “good” a life is and if that is superficial and too much influenced by fashion. For example the cliche is go travelling or get rich starting a business. “I raised kids” doesn’t have the same boastworthyness in a lot of circles, but arguably it’s more interesting. Or maybe not. What’s the life well lived metric?

> What’s the life well lived metric?

I grew up Christian, and among Christian young people a common question was "What's God's plan for my life?"

In that context, I came across Micah 6:8 which spells it out about as plainly as you'll find anywhere:

"He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?"

That seems like a standard that everyone can get behind. It gives you a standard by which to measure how well you're living, but your options remain open to do whatever you want as long as you do it justly, kindly, and humbly.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#66

Post by selimthegrim »

bonoboTP wrote: post #47
imgabe wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Don't get a job based on how impressive it sounds when you tell people about it at parties. You will spend far more time doing the job than you will talking about it at parties.

Also, there will always be higher status people around you. If you're a successful doctor, and move around in fancy doctor circles, you will know more accomplished doctors, directors of famous hospitals or whatever. You can always be bitter from envy if you're blinded by the status game. The struggle never ends, there's no "arriving". Software dev salaries (in the US) let you live way beyond material needs and allows…

This. How did you help people around you? Did you use your network to enhance theirs? Did you lift as you climbed? Is your institution or organization (if you are working for one) the better for having you?

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#67

Post by qntty »

pdog wrote: post #5

“Someone once told me the definition of Hell: The last day you have on earth, the person you became will meet the person you could have become .”

That doesn't sound so bad actually. Once you have one foot out the door, who cares? If somebody told me that I once lived another life that I can't remember as some alien species, and I didn't accomplish any of the things that members of those species value, it wouldn't bother me.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#68

Post by throwaway189262 »

person_of_color wrote: post #2

Definitely not be a software engineer. No one told me how incredibly low the social status is. EDIT: I guess it was suspicious that 99% of my high school circle picked law or finance or business courses instead.

Haha do 500 hours of leetcode and go work for FAANG. It's a totally different level of social status than regular engineers and the only qualifications needed is leetcode mediums in 20 mins

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#69

Post by kulig »

person_of_color wrote: post #2

Definitely not be a software engineer. No one told me how incredibly low the social status is. EDIT: I guess it was suspicious that 99% of my high school circle picked law or finance or business courses instead.

Lmao. Start lifting weights and learn how to dress. Nobody gives a damn what your job is.

If you actually think lawyer is a high status job then youre watching too many movies.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#70

Post by [deleted] »

TheCoelacanth wrote: post #63
runawaybottle wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It’s fundamentally disrespected by people at a core level. I’ll prove my point with the one question they always ask us versus any other profession, ‘what is it that you actually do at the company?’. I swear, I’d never think to ask this of anyone, doctors, lawyers, teachers, nurses, cops, literally, I can’t think of one profession that gets asked this, I’ll try again, pilots, chemists, diplomats, translators, artists…

I don't think I've ever been asked that by anyone other than my grandparents. Anyone under retirement age and reasonably well-educated knows what software development is or at least doesn't ask because they think it would make them look stupid not to know.

[deleted]
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