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Friends at Work? Not So Much

nytimes.com

61–62 of 62 posts

Re: Friends at Work? Not So Much

#61
post #49
post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I feel similarly, but I also don't want to be friends with my coworkers. I'd rather we keep a friendly, polite distance in our relationships. I love my job, and go to work to actually work: my social interaction comes from elsewhere, on my own terms. I honestly think this keeps things more productive. There's less room for wasting time socializing, or worrying about people feeling left out, or (like you said) offendi…

I honestly think this keeps things more productive So you're just going to ignore the fact that the article notes studies proving the opposite? or anything else that takes time away from work How very Calvinist of you. You spend one third of your day at work, probably half of your conscious hours. Maybe your workplace shouldn't be a soulless machine dedicated only to cold efficiency and productivity? Just a thought.

> So you're just going to ignore the fact that the article notes studies proving the opposite?

Like another commenter already mentioned, I wasn't very convinced by this one study. I'm friendly and polite with my coworkers, and I take great care to understand what people on my team like and don't like regarding the work they're doing. I use this to make sure I can give people tasks I think they'd like best, and to offer to relieve their stress if they're overburdened with something they don't like.

I'm not their friend, but I care about their well-being and I believe it shows. I'm not convinced there would be productivity gains if I took the relationship further than that. I'd need more evidence.

> Maybe your workplace shouldn't be a soulless machine

It's not soulless. Why attack what I like? I think my work is tons of fun on its own, and entirely "soulful."

That's like saying it's "soulless" for me to run a marathon and not want to be distracted by running with friends who want to chat with me during the run. Running is fun in and of itself, and I'd rather not be distracted so I can get as much joy and fulfillment out of it as possible.

Re: Friends at Work? Not So Much

#62
post #36

Surprisingly, ctrl+f 'cubicle' gives no matches on NYT or here but it seems like an obvious reason. I can't speak for most of the rest of the world but today's Japanese office for rank and file still tends to look something like [1] - desks pointed inward, arranged so that workers are focused on common areas with low or no partitions. OTOH in the US the ubiquitous cubicles have high partitions and are often arranged…

lol I work in a pretty open "bullpen" as they say. Our desks have glass partitions but they're about 10" tall, and I can totally see the 3 guys I work with all the time. If we're using our standing tables there is no partition lol.

It's kinda distracting, actually. Especially when I've got headphones on and the coworker directly across from me doesn't. When he looks over I cant' tell if he's just looking around the room or giving me the "take your headphones off so I can talk to you" look lol.

Then again he usually tells me this in IM. Gotta love that.

After looking at the japanese floorplan.. I'd actually be totally fine with that.

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