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The death of partying in the USA

derekthompson.org

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Re: The death of partying in the USA

#591

Post by paulryanrogers »

JSteph22 wrote: post #575
vitaflo wrote: post #429

Earlier quoted context omitted.

From talking to many parents they want to give them activities so their kids aren’t bored or sitting inside on their phones all day. Sports is one of those things and lets them also be with other kids. The problem is kids being bored can be a good thing but they are never allowed to be. When I was a kid the internet didn’t even exist let alone cell phones and the only rule was “be home before sundown”. Kids now have…

If you let kids today "explore their own world" they'll just end up glued to phones.

Not if you limit their screen time and have reasonable limits on extracurriculars.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#592

Post by paulryanrogers »

conductr wrote: post #421
1shooner wrote: post #388

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>The demands on kids and families I'd like to understand this more. Families like this that I know talk about it as though it's as unavoidable as their mortgage, but functionally isn't this entirely self-imposed? Is it a lack of vision for an alternative? Are whole families succumbing to peer pressure? I don't relate to it.

My son is starting 1st grade this fall, has been at same school since he was 3 and it goes through high school so, these are and will be his peers and it starts as major FOMO/it's the main way kids socialize outside of school hours. Good way to burn off their energies, etc. But it's also, they're young, we want to expose them to everything, they can find their "thing", etc. He does tons of non-Athletic stuff too (STE…

> It is their entire friend group and becomes their identity.

This sounds horrific. I did little leagues, grew bored (and nearsighted), randomly played outside for hours, did videogames (sometimes obsessively), built "forts" inside and out, went to / hosted parties, got into trouble, made amends (usually), family vacations, etc. Over identifying with groups and things seems crazy to me.

Maybe I'm overcompensating for my parent's (and at times my own) religious fervor. So much emotional investment seems unhinged.

Hopefully my kids can learn to enjoy their childhood. There will be plenty of time for serious commitments when they're adults.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#593

Post by frollogaston »

9rx wrote: post #550
frollogaston wrote: post #468

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It was totally unacceptable to drink and drive in the 2000s, and the sharp decline didn't start until right after. You'd also find a similar decline in socializing among non-driving-age children.

It was totally unacceptable in the 2000s, but there still remained a lot of "...but I can probably get away with it". That has declined in the interim.

The overall "going out with friends" survey result, not just partying, dropped from like 76% to 65% within a few years. There's no way that was from people suddenly not drinking and driving.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#595

Post by frollogaston »

pjc50 wrote: post #150
LeanderK wrote: post #41

Purely anecdotal, but I was recently reflecting at the current trend of people posting really extensive morning routines. Waking up, meditation, yoga, gym, shower, eating breakfast, meal-prepping,....having a whole day before your day starts. While they should impress you with their healthiness and discipline, I just thought how utterly lonely and sterile most of them look like. And you're completely done after work…

I don't believe those are real. People are simply posting that because it's the kind of post that gets likes. Influencer life is a mirage.

Yeah I know 0 people like this. And I'd believe it if 1-2 people are actually like that without me knowing, cause they need to manage ADHD or something, but not a large number.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#597

Post by frollogaston »

floren wrote: post #573
phendrenad2 wrote: post #142

People are introverted and have no social skills thanks to smartphones. People have no shared interests in general, because there are so many niches. People have low self-esteem and body image issues. People are afraid that they'll get drunk and their behavior will be filmed and go viral. Previously available "soft" party drugs are too dangerous. People have no place to host a party, because they're all renters (not…

> People have no place to host a party, because they're all renters I've seen this repeated in several comments and I just don't get it -- renting a place, be it a college apartment or a full house as an adult, has never stopped me from throwing a party. Maybe if there was a "no parties" rule in the lease (which I've never seen, and I've rented at least a dozen different places) and the landlord lived in the building…

If anything, renters are more likely to throw parties. They don't care about the building or even the inside in the long-term. The likely worst case is losing a month's rent in the deposit, which you're likely to lose some of anyway even if you keep it perfectly clean.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#598

Post by frollogaston »

phendrenad2 wrote: post #142

People are introverted and have no social skills thanks to smartphones. People have no shared interests in general, because there are so many niches. People have low self-esteem and body image issues. People are afraid that they'll get drunk and their behavior will be filmed and go viral. Previously available "soft" party drugs are too dangerous. People have no place to host a party, because they're all renters (not…

The no shared interests / too many niches thing doesn't go mentioned enough.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#599

Post by frollogaston »

generalenvelope wrote: post #53

It feels ridiculous not to mention car dependence and the things that enabled it: restrictive zoning, parking minimums, the car lobby. In the last 50 years, the US has bulldozed dense, mixed used housing that enabled community and tight knit neighborhoods. More economically/socially viable housing (read: an apartment on top of a business) has literally been banned in much of the US. Ensuring that there's a large plot…

It feels ridiculous to bring up car dependence in an article about 1980-2020 social trends, when the US was car-dependent the entire time, and the big drop was in the 2010s in particular.

Re: The death of partying in the USA

#600

Post by frollogaston »

MisterTea wrote: post #220

Parties were where you went to meet random strangers, get intoxicated, and maybe get laid. None of this is exciting anymore. People are less motivated to go out. We have other forms of socialization. I blame a lot of the de-socialization on our constantly connected society. Since everyone is in contact with each other 24/7 via social media the idea of meeting random people is less exciting. The 24/7 news cycle also i…

People aren't even constantly connected via social media anymore. That was a thing in Facebook's earlier years, now most stuff is algorithmically fed from randos.
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