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Ask HN: Are you ok?

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Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#571

Post by paulcarroty »

crescentfresh wrote: post #473
Waterluvian wrote: post #393

I recently experienced months of sleeping problems. Where I wouldn't sleep for days. Or would sleep a few hours. I would be exhausted and my head would hit the pillow and BAM adrenaline and I can hear my heart pounding and I'm awake. It got so bad I would go into the basement and destroy a wall that I kept repairing. I would cry in frustration. I started to have suicidal thoughts. It was harming my marriage and made…

There's something deeper here that runs counter to the generally accepted idea that lights from screens at night disrupts the body's circadian rhythm and keeps us awake. Anecdotally I know that I can go from "can't sleep; thinking about everything I have to do tomorrow" to asleep in 10 mins opening my phone and browsing reddit - in dark mode no less, makes me feel better about doing it - and reading mindlessly. Empha…

> accepted idea that lights from screens at night disrupts the body's circadian rhythm and keeps us awake.

Seems like it's true, 'cause after couple of months living with "Night mode" on all my devices I sleep just fine. Also stopped to read/watch anything without good light.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#572

Post by pickle-wizard »

el_cujo wrote: post #29

Nope. I hate my current job and am trying to pick up some new skills in my spare time so I can switch, but its very hard to come home from my 9-5 and feel motivated to study a new subject. Progress is extremely slow and often feels hopeless. Any time I'm not studying I feel paralyzed by the stress of knowing that I should be doing that instead, and yet I'm so far from being done that I get no reprieve if I actually d…

I find myself un motivated to study/work on projects after work.

About 6 weeks ago I've decided to start getting up at 5AM and work on them before work. I find that works much better. I work on my projects for a couple of hours and get to the office about 8AM. Then that way when I leave the office I'm done for the day.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#573

Post by Yhippa »

Waterluvian wrote: post #393

I recently experienced months of sleeping problems. Where I wouldn't sleep for days. Or would sleep a few hours. I would be exhausted and my head would hit the pillow and BAM adrenaline and I can hear my heart pounding and I'm awake. It got so bad I would go into the basement and destroy a wall that I kept repairing. I would cry in frustration. I started to have suicidal thoughts. It was harming my marriage and made…

If I don't game for at least an hour every night there might not be any time for fun in the day due to life commitments and how "serious" things seem to be.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#574

Post by jakedub4d2 »

Waterluvian wrote: post #393

I recently experienced months of sleeping problems. Where I wouldn't sleep for days. Or would sleep a few hours. I would be exhausted and my head would hit the pillow and BAM adrenaline and I can hear my heart pounding and I'm awake. It got so bad I would go into the basement and destroy a wall that I kept repairing. I would cry in frustration. I started to have suicidal thoughts. It was harming my marriage and made…

Second on gaming. I would add running/working out to the list too!

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#575

Post by swozey »

anon9001 wrote: post #542
p1esk wrote: post #518

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Working on a beach is optional if it's not your thing. I only mentioned it because it would probably feel less like work to me. The point is you choose where and when you want to work. About being online - I worked remotely for a year with a 10 hour time difference. Talked to my boss on Skype once a week to discuss progress. The rest was up to me. Most of communication was done via ticket comments. Sometimes I skippe…

> Talked to my boss on Skype once a week to discuss progress. The rest was up to me. Most of communication was done via ticket comments. Wait, is this common? I'm constantly answering questions and helping my team along as people get stuck all day. If I had the kind of an arrangement you're describing, I'd just get all my work done for the week in a day, and I wouldn't have a problem. Was there anything preventing yo…

Sounds like you might be more of a lynchpin to the team than the other commenter (which isn't a negative to them). You could try being less available, say no more often, etc. But some people just can't get away from it.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#577

Post by Cyberis »

As a tech person, I am treated like a machine, one that should be in a closet -- not seen or heard, they just want work output and they don't want my opinion about whether what they propose is a good idea or bad one (spoiler, most of them are astoundingly bad since non-tech managers are usually as dumb as a box of rocks). I hate my job and increasingly my whole life. It would be great to work for people who know the value of what you do, and the tremendous effort required to do things right, and to just ask the question asked here (with an obvious interest in a real answer and a compassionate ear to hear it).

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#578

Post by sizzle »

Unfortunately no, my father had an intercerebral hemorrhagic stroke and in a coma with a bad prognosis as the bleed reached his brainstem and enter a ventricle.

I wish I could spend more time with him, work consumed me. Everyone please let your parents know you love them. Life hits you hard when you least expect it.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#579

Post by t0mek »

Waterluvian wrote: post #393

I recently experienced months of sleeping problems. Where I wouldn't sleep for days. Or would sleep a few hours. I would be exhausted and my head would hit the pillow and BAM adrenaline and I can hear my heart pounding and I'm awake. It got so bad I would go into the basement and destroy a wall that I kept repairing. I would cry in frustration. I started to have suicidal thoughts. It was harming my marriage and made…

I had 3 weeks during this summer when I was with my 5yo at my parents house. My parents took care of their grandchild and he was happy to just spend time with them. I didn't have to cook, take care of groceries or do any house chores that normally fill my day up. I could just work, so I did, for 10-12h a day (usually it's about 7h).

I had trouble with sleeping basically from the day one. I was constantly thinking about one more optimisation or bug fix I can apply to make the feature I'm working on better. I lost interest in my normal evening activities (movies, books, games). I had been looking forward to spending these 3 summer weeks at my parents' for a few months before, but I made it quite stressful, by my own wish.

I learnt that taking care of the kids and doing the house chores is something I really need to keep myself sane. Doing it I often wait for the evening, when I can just chill out - but it's hard to relax if you don't do anything else than hitting keyboard for the whole day.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#580

Post by aasasd »

Waterluvian wrote: post #393

I recently experienced months of sleeping problems. Where I wouldn't sleep for days. Or would sleep a few hours. I would be exhausted and my head would hit the pillow and BAM adrenaline and I can hear my heart pounding and I'm awake. It got so bad I would go into the basement and destroy a wall that I kept repairing. I would cry in frustration. I started to have suicidal thoughts. It was harming my marriage and made…

Back in the day, when a buddy was into Warcraft he could fall asleep anytime he wanted during the day. “I have five minutes before the next meeting. Zzzzzz...” Not sure it was just three hours at night, though.

Kinda similar how where I am, draftee privates can sleep standing up, and sometimes with open eyes.

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