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Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

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Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#511
post #467

Earlier quoted context omitted.

ok, let's go back to 2014. I was working on a project, a web front end. The ticket was "change color of button". This sounded easy, modify the CSS. However, the CSS was generated. From YAML. The YAML was generated from JSON. the JSON was pulled from mongo. The Mongo was updated through a strictly validated XSLT that had an enumeration of colors. Those colors did not include the button color we needed. Don't worry! Th…

That sounds complicated. Though I'm not sure if this is a valid example to counter my view. I can't comment on the exact situation you went through. It could be that that complexity was a side effect of having to solve far more complex and frequent issues more easily as opposed to doing simpler and rarer things more easily (unless of course changing button colours is a frequent modification). It's also possible that…

No it wasn't!

That's the whole point. What some people consider to be "good engineering" is a different set of standards, a different set of qualifiers.

Let's go back to 2012. I was yet again doing web stuff.

We had this hodgepodge of jasmine, junit, eslint and selenium and couldn't commit unless it all passed

But the tests broke more then the code itself, because it was . So more time was spent on fixing and babysitting the tests then writing the damn software.

Alas, we finally released and it totally completely bombed. Why?

Because those test suites don't care if something "feels" clunky or "looks" wrong ...The machine responded to the interface in machine time, it didn't actually test human time, which was the only thing that mattered. We should have relied on human dogfooding, like the business books say to do. I got arrogantly laughed at for suggesting it, multiple times; that simply wasn't "engineering" to this team.

Now of course tests are valuable, sometimes. But "sometimes", that's the important thing. Understanding when to make that call is actually important. When, where, what, why, and how - not just important for journalists.

But instead, like some 18th century royal court disconnected from reality, we did ceremony. So we wrote tests, most of them bullshit. One of the tests was essentially: "Does this image on the page load from s3?"

At least that one usually passed.

Except when AWS was down or our internet went out: "I guess we can't work today, the does_image_load_from_s3 test is preventing the commit." They were a waste of time and got in the way of actual work. But we HAD to have them, we MUST, right? Nonsense.

I'm convinced the tests were there because "doing it right" was about virtue signaling. So we built a salary defending potempkin village composed of pure thought stuff.

I imagine it all like a catholic mass: Men in robes walk around, ring bells, and use special boxes to wash their hands with special cloths; it's all very important if you go to church, but that's the point, it's praxis and faith: we were coding from plato's cave, creating intricate shadows of reality representing actual work.

Symbols passing as tools: like Dumbo fetishizing the feather and being oh so worried when it falls, everything passed the most sophisticated testing I had ever seen yet the program still crashed in the user's hands almost every time. All that work was mere ceremony.

Understanding how modern computing speeds and vc capital has allowed people to be wrapped up in their own bullshit, call it programming and get away with it, is a major insight into why technology sucks today.

It's not just you, everyone agrees. It's lame now.

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#512
It's the people. Driven to do bad out of fear.

Tech is capitalism at its best and worst, with the best being bad for a lot of people. Self imposed hardship and self sacrifice is the name of the pursuit. Everyone is a chaser. You then have VCs and angels and business partners with immense leverage over these struggles, often struggling themselves.

This brings out the bad in a lot of people. Cheating, backstabbing, and a general lack of integrity. Pervasive, regardless of status or level.

I didn't understand this at all, but it turns out much of it is driven from fear, as most actions inevitably are. And it gets worse with rising stakes, so its worse at higher levels.

Integrity is expensive. Kindness is expensive. Empathy is expensive. And competence is rare.

So good meaning, goodhearted, friendly people fail to sustain their good nature when shit hits the fan. And shit is always hitting the fan. People will act good until they cannot afford to. Or think they can't. Until they're scared. And that's the saddest part. They think they have to cheat. They then witness others do it, and think its just the way. Not me we tell ourselves, but sooner or later, the ultimatum presents itself: be good or survive. And we've seen the fallen. Chances are we've been a victim of one. Or work for one. Or deal with one. Or sit next to one. And the one thing they're good at is survival. No wonder there are so damn many of them.

Then what is the answer?

Don't trust anyone. Ergo, integrity is the luxury most often enjoyed alone.

But.

If you enjoy your own company, then that's a start. If you have an incredible product or service, then that's a start. If you don't need anyone's help, then that's a start. And if you have a warm home you can return to, then that's a start.

The one thing that will make your life easier is obvious.

Kick ass.

Just be so good, and run with it, or don't bother. That should be the motto of every entrepreneur. Or any endeavor, for that matter.

You're jumping into a snake pit. That's a given. Bring a flamethrower, or don't bother.

Every kick ass startup kicks ass.

If your ass is being kicked, you're doing it wrong, and you're wrong. You'd be right to get out as soon as possible.

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#513

I have also experience close to burnout and recovered multiple times, in the process I have lost very precious relationships, and entire years were spent in darkness. I also have friends who have been in tech for close to ten years, and are close to burning out though they would never admit to such. This is the nature of the beast, all things that appear glamorous on the outside ( Hollywood, Finance, Tech, many nonpr…

This sounds so American to me. I grew up in Eastern Europe and general attitude towards work, life, and friendship is so much different. Some of the best friendships I've made were at the companies I worked for. I've seen cases where people make so good friendships at work that it even makes them postpone switching jobs to move up the career ladder. Work is not everything in your life. Work is important for sure, but…

[deleted]

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#514

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd add open office plans to this. It's awful. You never quite get to focus, you don't build the rapport with your team, you don't get to customize your physical environment. Development really became a white collar version of the assembly line.

This is something I see people railing against all the time here. I'm young and new to the industry so I've never experienced anything other than open-plan offices. So maybe I just don't know what I'm missing out on but the idea of private offices/cubicles is really unappealing to me. I really like collaboration spaces, being able to see people's faces, being social, bouncing ideas off each other, pair programming et…

Private offices suck. The environment you want is ~5 developers per office. You get to build rapport with your coworkers, customize the physical space together, collaborate, differentiate yourselves from other teams. But you don't have to deal with Heather in recruiting telling Judy about the details of her wedding dress.

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#515
You have been though trauma - whether or not it was self inflicted or your fault or anyone else's fault is nto the issue here at the moment. You are still in the midst of it (gathered from your writing) and it will pass (hopefully).

Look around and see if there is something you can do that involves service to your community (however you define that). For me volunteering as an EMT on weekends has helped me a lot.

Finding something where you feel like what you are doing is meaningful - even if in a very local small way - gets you grounded.

Good luck!

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#516
post #405

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't agree with this view. I agree with the original commentor's comment. I do this myself outside of work just to enjoy building something without the responsibility of having to maintain it with 20 other engineers for two more decades. However, even I can see that a team would get burnt if they built an enterprise software the way I code my personal email client. The problem here is that people forget that build…

ok, let's go back to 2014. I was working on a project, a web front end. The ticket was "change color of button". This sounded easy, modify the CSS. However, the CSS was generated. From YAML. The YAML was generated from JSON. the JSON was pulled from mongo. The Mongo was updated through a strictly validated XSLT that had an enumeration of colors. Those colors did not include the button color we needed. Don't worry! Th…

> However, the CSS was generated. From YAML. The YAML was generated from JSON. the JSON was pulled from mongo. The Mongo was updated through a strictly validated XSLT that had an enumeration of colors.

I thought you were exaggerating to make a joke. Sigh.

> I left. Company is worth over $100 million today, looks like I'm the loser I guess.

Somebody played the lottery and won. 99.9999% played and lost.

You are not a "loser" for not playing the lottery.

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#517

I think the fundamental flaw is trying to be 'successful'. Playing that game invariably requires you to pretend to be what you think the market wants. I would suggest you think about building something you want that you find fun. If you're a scuba diver, build a dive computer. If you're a woodworker make a tool for making the best use of a board. The most important thing is you absolutely don't plan on making it a wo…

For most people it's not about trying to be successful. It's about not having to be stressed out daily about basic needs like home, health, transport, kids upbringing etc. Unfortunately it all costs a lot of money these days, which makes you take a compromise for the sake of security for you and your closest relatives.

OT: why are you "polskibus"?

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#518
post #82

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is right. The OP said he is "disillusioned with technology" but I didn't see actual technology being described as the problem with any point. So there's a conflation here happening between technology and "tech" companies. And I can only say the phrase "tech" companies while using sarcasm quotes around "tech", because almost nobody at any of these companies develops actual technology. And that's a big part of the…

There's a subculture that's reinvented the merits of software engineering to being as ornate and ceremonious as possible. It doesn't have to work well, or be bug free, or compatible with the previous version, or address any real world need. No! Instead it has to use fashionable technology and be extremely complicated so other programmers can see how incredibly clever they are! Almost like they took a random bug from…

> Instead it has to use fashionable technology and be extremely complicated so other programmers can see how incredibly clever they are!

You are describing "CV-driven development", where people want to use heavily marketed technology brands in their CV as a substitute for real skill and experience.

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#519

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't know how your comment is contributing to the conversation. No one asked about the definition of good code. The definition was assumed to be understood.

Asking "but what if?" without actually making the point you think is implied in that rhetorical question isn't much of a conversation to begin with.

That does not justify an irrelevant answer. If something it not understood then questions should be asked.

Re: Extremely disillusioned with technology. Please help

#520

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd add open office plans to this. It's awful. You never quite get to focus, you don't build the rapport with your team, you don't get to customize your physical environment. Development really became a white collar version of the assembly line.

This is something I see people railing against all the time here. I'm young and new to the industry so I've never experienced anything other than open-plan offices. So maybe I just don't know what I'm missing out on but the idea of private offices/cubicles is really unappealing to me. I really like collaboration spaces, being able to see people's faces, being social, bouncing ideas off each other, pair programming et…

Back when I had a cubicle, I had a second chair and a white board in my cube, and people would come for a visit when they wanted to talk about something, and we'd draw on the whiteboard, and we were social and bouncing ideas off each other. Now, I'm in an open floor plan office, and when the guy who sits literally next to me wants to talk to me, he sends me something over slack. I think people don't want to disturb each other in an open floor plan office, so they rely on these IM tools more? I don't know, but I know it's way, way less social now than it was when I had my cube.
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