501–510 of 517 posts
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again, super happy for you. but i feel some people try to go out of their way to convince themselves that racism is not at play even when it clearly is, because it paints a picture where they are somehow "better" than those who experience hatred. the guy who yelled at me to park farther away, when I called him out on what he said, he walked up to me in an imposing manner and said, "so yeah, I can be a little racist,…
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In the case of America, violent crime is at a 50 year low. New York City, for example, was far more dangerous back when La Cosa Nostra was calling the shots than it is today.
Wasn’t the 50 year low just before Covid?
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> This is in spite of having a long list of technical accomplishments and an impeccable public track record under my belt. If skills aren’t the problem, one possibility is that a rigid attitude, lack of humility, or something like that is rubbing interviewers the wrong way. Please forgive my unsolicited advice and good luck with the search.
Or honestly maybe just bad luck. Lots of possibilities for just a one-off internet comment. But yeah no doubt wise to do some self reflection and analyze what one could do better when trying again. One shouldn't just continue the same strategy without reflection when faluire occurs. But also don't be too hard on yourself, sometimes things just don't work out.
Sometimes I feel as though I'm being hindered artificially by some hidden forces but I try not to focus on this. It's partly why I share my experiences online and why I talk about this with my co-founder and family members. It helps when others validate my experiences because it can often feel like too many coincidences.
I worry the feeling might get worse with AI now literally manipulating people's psychology and thus, the markets as well. There's a chance my fears may become reality.
It'd be silly to keep working on a startup if there was a super-intelligence preventing me (or any new industry entrant) from succeeding right? This is a new reality I may need to factor in at some point. Would have been insane to think that way 5 years ago. Not so insane anymore.
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Your commments are great, and made me lol, which is super rare - great insight, honestly... thanks But if you've never had kids, you're missing out on so much. This is just my experience, and is how I "grew up" from 20-35. I didn't want kids, but now love them so much, and as 55 year old man, with a 21 and 20 year old that still live with me, I'm doing so well, and have been blessed by them being in my life, and my w…
Yeah, I’m somewhere in that window, and those thoughts are definitely emerging (I’m at 35 and SO is 33). This is blowing my mind, because I’ve been standing fast by the idea to not rush, to not force, to not push reality. But something is softening, not just in me but also in the SO. I do appreciate you sharing the idea. It takes maturity to stop thinking only about your own terms, your own wants, your own needs. To…
This goes to what you are saying about purpose in life. Without them I am not sure we would still be happy or even together. Children gave us a new reason to live and something to work on together. Life is no longer how the two of us can be happy but how we can make others happy, thus giving us pride to be happy ourselves. Strange to think about where we would be without them, but glad I only must speculate not actually know.
I grew up more remote with less opportunity for friends. My partner grew up in a densely populated area with lots of friends (my partner is way more socially adjusted than I am). The ones I made are the ones I still have while my partners are mostly gone and live elsewhere. We decided to raise our family in a large neighborhood with lots of friend opportunities as I feel that is the best way to let them experience life. Personally, I would love to be on 20 acres with my arsenal and survival gear, but that would not be fair to anyone in my family. We got the house with woods in the backyard (and a highway behind that) and both sides for a half acre in each direction, with close neighbors to the front. The rest of the neighborhood is house to house like any other. I need to be able to walk out my back door and take a leak if needed and be alone. While walking out the front provides the typical suburban experience. All comes back to compromise.
Whatever you decide, best of luck! Living the Mad Max lifestyle is hard to beat....
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And yet somehow tens of millions of us manage to live in them.
It's amazing what people will adapt to. A friend of mine living in Minneapolis said you can't lock your car in her neighborhood, otherwise someone will just break the windows to get inside to look for things to steal. One night, her husband forgot and locked it out of habit, and before the next morning one of the windows was broken. That anyone chooses to live like that baffles me.
Coming from a Latin American the idea of re-starting your life across the country for college and then again for work (multiple times sometimes) while away from family and friends is very foreign. A lot of the conversation around modern American youth feeling isolated, lacking socialization and not building strong relationships seems that stem from this drive. Another thing that’s really weird and related is another…
My childhood friend did this with his buddies. In our 20s they bought a big house in the suburbs and each had a room. They lived in that for a few years, and then when people started sprouting kids, some of them moved into the same building that was run as a coop. Eventually a lot of them were living in this coop. So now when I go back to see him there's all these people there that I've known since forever, living in…
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The socio-economic landscape in the US means where it is cheaper/easier to setup families and have kids is rarely correlated with economic opportunity. And in the US, people can move easily. So kids usually have a a choice - either stay where they grew up, and live with reduced economic opportunities (actually very common, but those folks aren’t usually posting all over the Internet about it). Or move to where the ec…
> cheaper/easier to setup families and have kids is rarely correlated with economic opportunity That's the problem. Due to car culture and zoning policies etc.
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Can you elaborate on the social skills that aren't otherwise demanded? I can relate to this a bit, but I feel like I'm only starting to scratch the surface
The real problem is most people later in life are full of friends and thus don't really need more. They have and used those social skills in school (including college), but then settled into life and made friends. As one friend moves away they will need a different one, but that doesn't happen often and so they don't need to make friends. It isn't that they are unfriendly, just that they already have a social life as…
It's quite possible to have a "full" but stagnant social life (which is where I think some older software folks with families are finding themselves). It's also possible to have a dynamic social life without large numbers of people involved.
To avoid stagnancy, you always need new friends. This doesn't mean you have to kick others out. It just means accepting the natural flow of friends and relationships in and out of our lives, and accepting that this is something we don't have full control of.
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Perhaps it’s just my bubble, but I mainly see this happen with people who do knowledge work which could definitely be 100% completed online. Even if this is just a “tiny fraction” of workers, allowing them the liberty to easily pursue their career while also maintaining close relations with their family would be good, not merely something to write off as negligible. Every human life matters.
It simply creates an even more privileged knowledge worker class. I recently spent a lot of time in some more rural parts of the US. There is rapidly growing resentment over this topic. It came up nearly daily in casual conversation/overheard at bars/etc. It might be good for 5-10% of the population, but at what cost to social cohesion? These were certainly not CEO type of folks, and they were not terminally on-line…
It couldn't solve everything, that doesn't mean it can't solve anything.
My experience in rural areas (northern canada) has been the opposite of yours.
Locals welcome remote workers because the alternative is bidding up housing over vacation homes that sit empty.
Remote workers give back to the community through civic engagement and injecting their income into it year round. Anyone not in that mindset of integrating with the community typically doesn't stay past their first winter.
Locals are also the ones to decide if/when/where they advertise real estate to outsiders. Locals always get first dibs via word of mouth so there isn't as much resentment.
But maybe that is the difference between rural communities and remote communities?