Earlier quoted context omitted.
Perhaps it seems obvious to some, but it's not obvious to me so I need to ask: What's the advantage of a selectively-available DNS for kids playing Minecraft with Nintendo Switch instead of regular DNS [whether self-hosted or not]? All I can think of is that it adds obscurity, in that it makes the address of the Minecraft server more difficult to discover or guess (and thus keeps everything a bit more private/griefin…
Ok, why would I want to do that? Because when Microsoft bought Minecraft they decided to split the ecosystem into the Java Edition (everyone playing on a computer) and Bedrock Edition (Consoles, Tablets, ...) and cross-play is not possible on the official realms. That leaves out the option to just pay and rent a realm for the group. So we're hosting our own minecraft server and a suitable connector for cross-play - a…
For example, any red-hat based linux distro comes with Firewalld, you could set rules that by default will block all external connections and only allow your kids and their friends IP addresses to connect to your server (and only specifically on port 53). So your DNS server will only receive connections from the whitelisted IPs. Of course the only downside is that if their IP changes, you'll have to troubleshoot and whitelist the new IP, and there is the tiny possibility that they might be behind CGNAT where their IPv4 is shared with another random person, who is looking to exploit DNS servers.
But I'd say that is a pretty good solution, no one will know you are even running a DNS service except for the whitelisted IPs.