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My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

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Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#51

Post by rmah »

joefife wrote: post #42
MattGaiser wrote: post #3

1. How do other companies handle these situations? How do you effectively handle an employee rendered unable to perform their job due to tragedy? This came up with Atlassian a few weeks ago, and they have a much better reputation than Amazon and it doesn't seem like they handled things in a great way either. The reality is that you might just need to terminate people who cannot perform, no matter what the reason. 2.…

Given that we gladly give 6 months paid maternity to those who choose to have children, I'm fairly sure we'd give this chap a break. I cannot believe the inhumanity in this thread.

Most of the time on maternity leave is typically unpaid. If I understand correctly, this guy refused to take leave on reduced pay.

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#52

Post by debacle »

ldjkfkdsjnv wrote: post #20

Believe it or not, this isn't a rare attitude among managers at Amazon. A significant percentage of SDMs believe they must "keep a high bar" and remove any dissenting subordinates. Word has gotten out about it, mostly on the blind app, which forced Amazon to raise pay bands for engineers 50-100k. This is costing the company a lot of money. The difference going forwards for Amazon is that the stock is mostly stagnant,…

What is the blind app?

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#53

Post by badpeoplehere »

mrRandomGuy wrote: post #29
Traubenfuchs wrote: post #14

I don‘t understand how someone smart enough to make 300.000 a year (That is an insane fortune to almost everyone, even in first world countries) feels entitled to a month-, year-long reduction of performance expectations because of personal tragedy. There are thousands waiting for his position and they would kill to get it.

God, sometimes reading the comments on this website makes me want to burn my eyeballs off. Like, why is there such a large chunk of people who literally go to bat for such shit practices?

It’s an offshoot if the culture of YC, the mods and Paul Graham. This place collects reactionaries, racists, sexists… above all else it’s people who worship billionaires. It’s a disgusting pit of the tech industry and the site owners encorage this behavior by moderating away anyone who has even an ounce of humanity. No doubt you’ll get scolded if you keep pointing out how obviously horrible this “community” is.

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#54

Post by adt2bt »

asjldkfin wrote: post #12
starbugs wrote: post #7

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You behave like a human being with feelings. You do the best you can to support and help someone who suffers unbelievably and you f**ing show some empathy. This involves actually putting yourself in the shoes of someone else, yes. It means that you share a part of their suffering. You are dealing with a human, not a "resource" and not a machine. It sickens me to read stories like that to the point where I really cons…

If I'm paying a person $200-$300K to build a house and his wife gets cancer; it doesn't entitle him to keep my money. He gives it back because he didn't do his job. Same principle.

The analogy of a house is entirely incorrect - a house is a one time transaction. Giving an employee space and support during this time likely leads to loyalty and better production in the long run. It also prevents articles like this, which is probably worth the $300k, as even ONE talented engineer turned off from joining Amazon due to this article will cost them that much and more.

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#55

Post by CobrastanJorji »

MattGaiser wrote: post #3

1. How do other companies handle these situations? How do you effectively handle an employee rendered unable to perform their job due to tragedy? This came up with Atlassian a few weeks ago, and they have a much better reputation than Amazon and it doesn't seem like they handled things in a great way either. The reality is that you might just need to terminate people who cannot perform, no matter what the reason. 2.…

It varies wildly by manager.

When I was at Amazon, one of my coworkers had a serious mental and physical crisis. Our manager went out of his way to support them, granting them unlimited leave, accepting them back on a part time / temporary basis whenever they felt up for it, etc. To make this work, though, I'm pretty sure the manager and probably his manager went around the system and basically didn't report the absences, because corporate policy almost certainly would've been to fire them. It effectively cost that manager an invaluable headcount spot, and it went on for over a year.

I generally hated working for Amazon, but I loved that particular manager and would happily work for him again anytime.

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#57

Post by _6hmp »

debacle wrote: post #52
ldjkfkdsjnv wrote: post #20

Believe it or not, this isn't a rare attitude among managers at Amazon. A significant percentage of SDMs believe they must "keep a high bar" and remove any dissenting subordinates. Word has gotten out about it, mostly on the blind app, which forced Amazon to raise pay bands for engineers 50-100k. This is costing the company a lot of money. The difference going forwards for Amazon is that the stock is mostly stagnant,…

What is the blind app?

It's a forum for people at tech companies to anonymously talk to other people at their companies in a private forum, or with people at other companies publicly to all members. They validate employment using your email address. As could be expected many of the topics devolve into toxic messes, but there is some useful discussion.

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#58

Post by [deleted] »

debacle wrote: post #52
ldjkfkdsjnv wrote: post #20

Believe it or not, this isn't a rare attitude among managers at Amazon. A significant percentage of SDMs believe they must "keep a high bar" and remove any dissenting subordinates. Word has gotten out about it, mostly on the blind app, which forced Amazon to raise pay bands for engineers 50-100k. This is costing the company a lot of money. The difference going forwards for Amazon is that the stock is mostly stagnant,…

What is the blind app?

[deleted]

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#59

Post by friedman23 »

debacle wrote: post #52
ldjkfkdsjnv wrote: post #20

Believe it or not, this isn't a rare attitude among managers at Amazon. A significant percentage of SDMs believe they must "keep a high bar" and remove any dissenting subordinates. Word has gotten out about it, mostly on the blind app, which forced Amazon to raise pay bands for engineers 50-100k. This is costing the company a lot of money. The difference going forwards for Amazon is that the stock is mostly stagnant,…

What is the blind app?

teamblind.com

Re: My Wife Was Dying of Brain Cancer. My Boss at Amazon Told Me to Perform or Quit

#60

Post by tomhallett »

ucm_edge wrote: post #50
PragmaticPulp wrote: post #4

A tip: If anyone finds themselves in a tragic situation like this where they can’t work but also can’t afford to take leave, investigate your short and long-term disability benefits ASAP. Also read up on the documentation necessary to begin disability claims. Engage with a doctor early on who can document the severe depressive symptoms that are preventing work (which the author specifically cites in his anecdote). Do…

Very much this. You always want to be asking HR for an accommodation that is protected by law. Then HR enters into the mode of protecting the company by ensuring they don't get in trouble for violating the law. You go in and say "Hey my wife is dying and my performance is probably going to be impacted, can something be done?", HR may opt to 'protect' the company by starting to build a case for terminating a low perfo…

Oh wow. This (especially with respect to the mental model of the incentives for how a company works on the inside) should be taught in school.
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