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I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

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Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#51

Post by Abishek_Muthian »

fellowniusmonk wrote: post #11
BigHatLogan wrote: post #5

That was quite nice. The writer seems to be in relative peace about the whole situation, or at least as peaceful as one can be knowing that the end is near. Unrelated but related: How do we keep stories like this in the "middle" of our minds? I've noticed with myself--and many others--that we read articles and essays like this, contemplate them for a moment or two, think about how we should be more {appreciate, grate…

I was born with multiple heart defect. I've had so many surgeries I wasn't sure I'd wake up from, in fact my first surgery was at 3 and is my first memory, for a couple weeks out of every year I practically live at a cardiologist.. it's funny talking about waiting for a package. Most things roll off my back but waiting.. for packages, waiting in line, etc. drive me nuts. I could die at any second, I want to experienc…

Been in and out of operation theaters all my life too but the latest one had the largest impact on how I see the life.

Hours before my spine surgery which had 50-50 survival and was needed to stop me from becoming a quadriplegic I was typing documentation for strategy for my startup products to my share holders in case I die.

After I woke up from surgery, The first major decision I took was to close my startup.

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#52

Post by itisit »

ohmyblock wrote: post #50

has anyone here read 'Not fade away: a short live well lived' ? I was deeply moved by that book

By Laurence Shames and Peter Barton. One of the more entertaining end-of-life memoirs. "When Breath Becomes Air" by Paul Kalanithi is also recommended.

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#53

Post by lcall »

I expect to live a long time yet, but have chronic illness that severly limits me, and life can be good, and it can be hard. I have also learned for myself that God is real, cares, life has a purpose and extends before & after this mortality, questions have answers, each person including you is of infinite worth, and you never truly have to be alone. And there is a way for us to be with our families forever, if we & they want.

(I enjoyed the article, and many have posted nice comments. Thoughtful comments to this are appreciated, if downvoting.)

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#54

Post by lcall »

beardyw wrote: post #42

My wife and I have reached an age (1 month apart) where death has become “when” rather than “if”. My mother, father, and three siblings have all died around an age I am rapidly approaching. My sister experienced a similar death to this, she was given only months to live. Others have died suddenly and without warning. My wife has already lost a brother. So between us we talk sometimes about which of us will die first.…

Fwiw, I have learned for myself that we can be with our beloved family members forever, if we and they want, and do what is needed for it. All the best. (slightly more in my other comment on this page; thoughtful comments appreciated with downvotes...)

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#55

Post by luckyandroid »

BigHatLogan wrote: post #5

That was quite nice. The writer seems to be in relative peace about the whole situation, or at least as peaceful as one can be knowing that the end is near. Unrelated but related: How do we keep stories like this in the "middle" of our minds? I've noticed with myself--and many others--that we read articles and essays like this, contemplate them for a moment or two, think about how we should be more {appreciate, grate…

Anger is a gut reaction, learned over time when you're young and likely to persist in muscle memory for a long time.

The way to get around it is the same as any other habit - mindful practice of your reactions. Let yourself feel angry, but take a breath and make the decision to not act on it and do the harder act of being kind or good as a response instead. Over time, it gets easier, but anger will never leave you completely.

It's easy to be angry, it's a lot harder and more rewarding to purposefully act better instead.

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#56

Post by readflaggedcomm »

tonyedgecombe wrote: post #43
arriu wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why the down votes? Not everyone on this site has an active subscription and clearly the a author wants his message read. I'm really curious, please respond.

>clearly the a author wants his message read More likely the author wants to be paid for his work. If he wanted to offer it for free there are plenty of alternative platforms to publish on.

I saw no requests for payment, i only saw a headline without a story. I have no patience to assume why a web site is broken.

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#57

Post by tonyedgecombe »

readflaggedcomm wrote: post #56
tonyedgecombe wrote: post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>clearly the a author wants his message read More likely the author wants to be paid for his work. If he wanted to offer it for free there are plenty of alternative platforms to publish on.

I saw no requests for payment, i only saw a headline without a story. I have no patience to assume why a web site is broken.

>I saw no requests for payment

It was published in the Boston Globe, a commercial organisation. I think it's a reasonable conclusion that the author gets paid for their work. He has been at the paper at least since 1979 according to the article.

Re: I just learned I only have months to live. This is what I want to say

#58

Post by readflaggedcomm »

tonyedgecombe wrote: post #57
readflaggedcomm wrote: post #56

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I saw no requests for payment, i only saw a headline without a story. I have no patience to assume why a web site is broken.

>I saw no requests for payment It was published in the Boston Globe, a commercial organisation. I think it's a reasonable conclusion that the author gets paid for their work. He has been at the paper at least since 1979 according to the article.

It's not reasonable to conclude that going out of my way to pay money will make a page suddenly populate with a story. If there's no offer for more content, I don't assume it's there.
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