Female Founder Secrets: Fertility • Hacker News Board

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#51

Post by johnzim » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:04 PM UTC

Ma8ee wrote: post #21

Or get a husband that takes care of the kids. The woman will of course have carry the children in her womb, which will be some tough months. But after that the husband can do almost everything. If she feels that it is important to feed the baby breast milk the first months, excellent pumps can be bought. This is a much better option than waiting until it almost is to late. (I’m not talking out of my ass: I’m currentl…

This is great advice. I was in a similar position till we moved to the Bay Area, which flipped the financial calculus.

Other than breast-feeding, Dads can do everything that's required and pumping works out great for everyone.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#52

Post by draw_down » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:04 PM UTC

This is really sad to read. If you want children, I can only imagine that's ultimately more important than having some company to run.

Realizing opportunities are foreclosed to you as you age is always sad, but this one seems really tough.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#53

Post by asdfasgasdgasdg » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:04 PM UTC

fastball wrote: post #20

asdfasgasdgasdg wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For highly skilled technical people and business leaders, we already do live in that society. There are many companies that will happily pay you entirely unreasonable amounts of money to work a 9-5 job. However, you can opt in to lifestyles where you work yourself to death in the hopes of getting even more excessive riches and fame than you would get by living a more relaxed lifestyle.

I don't want fame or riches. I just want to build something nobody else has built.

You can do that as a hobby, or you can do it as a startup but treat the startup as a 9-5. (Your leisurely pace of work might hurt your chances of staying ahead of your competitors, but that's only important if you want the wealth and fame part.)

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#54

Post by tobib » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:04 PM UTC

Ma8ee wrote: post #21

Or get a husband that takes care of the kids. The woman will of course have carry the children in her womb, which will be some tough months. But after that the husband can do almost everything. If she feels that it is important to feed the baby breast milk the first months, excellent pumps can be bought. This is a much better option than waiting until it almost is to late. (I’m not talking out of my ass: I’m currentl…

I'm currently working in my home office while my partner is looking after our newborn full time and I'm jealous as hell. I genuinely with I could stay at home longer than just a couple of weeks/a few months and be a full time stay at home parent. Unfortunately it doesn't work for us financially but I wish it did.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#55

Post by setpatchaddress » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:05 PM UTC

Ma8ee wrote: post #21

Or get a husband that takes care of the kids. The woman will of course have carry the children in her womb, which will be some tough months. But after that the husband can do almost everything. If she feels that it is important to feed the baby breast milk the first months, excellent pumps can be bought. This is a much better option than waiting until it almost is to late. (I’m not talking out of my ass: I’m currentl…

This is a fine thing that can work for some people and not for others: it's really hard to live a decent life on a single (tech!) income in Silicon Valley if you're not already wealthy, and young people may not have enough saved up to take a year off.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#56

Post by austincheney » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:05 PM UTC

abellerose wrote: post #41

austincheney wrote: post #7

The only logical answer here is youth. The younger you are the more fertile you are. This is true for both men and women, but more true for women. If you want children at some point in life then prioritize children first and early. I know, this puts your ambitious career on hold for a while and start ups require huge ambition. Still, start up opportunities will not be hyper critically different in the future than the…

It's completely unethical to have kids and like another commenter has said brings a great disadvantage economically. I would suggest to anyone to not follow your advice. edit: I won't be further commenting on the topic because the same people asking everyone "when are you going to have kids like me?" are just going to downvote. Yes, I rather see an end to humankind because that ends suffering. Less suffering in a uni…

It's unethical to have kids? I don't follow.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#57

Post by Ma8ee » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:05 PM UTC

lainga wrote: post #36

Ma8ee wrote: post #21

Or get a husband that takes care of the kids. The woman will of course have carry the children in her womb, which will be some tough months. But after that the husband can do almost everything. If she feels that it is important to feed the baby breast milk the first months, excellent pumps can be bought. This is a much better option than waiting until it almost is to late. (I’m not talking out of my ass: I’m currentl…

Do you think people would receive your advice the same way if the sexes were reversed?

The situation where the sexes are reversed is the norm. That is what almost all successful career men do: they let the wife take care of the kids.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#58

Post by mutatio » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:05 PM UTC

izolate wrote: post #11

This is a heartbreaking read, I feel for the author. This is a true case of biology not having kept up with societal progress.

"Progress"? Interesting interpretation, I'd invert that; society is miles from where it needs to be if these situations are increasing in frequency. And I don't think medi/biotech is the solution.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#59

Post by ThisIsTheWay » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:05 PM UTC

austincheney wrote: post #7

The only logical answer here is youth. The younger you are the more fertile you are. This is true for both men and women, but more true for women. If you want children at some point in life then prioritize children first and early. I know, this puts your ambitious career on hold for a while and start ups require huge ambition. Still, start up opportunities will not be hyper critically different in the future than the…

I feel like part of the problem is the obsession in media and social circles with young success. I see lists like Forbes 30 under 30, 40 under 40, and the celebration of young billionaires who are worshipped and held up as the example of what high performers should strive to be, and its quite unhealthy. I wish there were more stories about people who found success in their 40's, 50's and beyond, especially the ones who took time to fail, learn from it, and apply it later in life.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#60

Post by abellerose » Thu, Mar 04, 2021, 6:05 PM UTC

lainga wrote: post #46

abellerose wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's completely unethical to have kids and like another commenter has said brings a great disadvantage economically. I would suggest to anyone to not follow your advice. edit: I won't be further commenting on the topic because the same people asking everyone "when are you going to have kids like me?" are just going to downvote. Yes, I rather see an end to humankind because that ends suffering. Less suffering in a uni…

What impact do you foresee any economic gains from childlessness having in 100 years, if your advice is followed universally? Who will inherit those gains?

I believe the context for the advice is directed to whoever is capable of having children. So, economic gains are meaningless to them when they're dead in 100 years.