How not to say the wrong thing (2013)

Post by recursive » Mon, Oct 08, 2018, 3:50 PM UTC

exodust wrote: post #43

recursive wrote: post #42

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Your sadness about it doesn't eliminate the need for the diagram. So it's not really an argument against the diagram.

This diagram is nothing more than a psychologist's theoretical doodle. The diagram is not needed. Pasting it to your fridge, as mentioned in the article, is not needed. Obviously I'm not referring to "my sadness" when I use the expression "it's sad". It's pathetic that anyone would need to refer to such a diagram before interacting with other people on any level. Just because a psychologist made the diagram and guide…

Both sadness and patheticism (real word?) can exist only in the eye of the beholder. If you're not the one sad about it, then who is? It sounds like you're saying "it" is just objectively and platonically sad. In my opinion, that is not a thing.

Post by srean » Tue, Oct 09, 2018, 6:16 PM UTC

rdtsc wrote: post #5

> stepped into the hall with Katie's husband, Pat. "I wasn't prepared for this," she told him. "I don't know if I can handle it." Be suspicious of people who you don't know that well, but all of the sudden they pop up in a moment of crisis. Sometimes they want to be part of it and go around and brag to others how their friend / relative is suffering. It's just a source of gossip for them. Then they get the sympathy-b…

> As a general rule I find that people who want to celebrate with you when something good happens and are happy for you are more likely to be a better friend than the ones who show up when you're in trouble.

I agree with you that if a friend does not feel joy in your moments of happiness and accomplishments the friendship is probably not very deep or sincere. But there's the fair weather variety. I am not sure those are the only kind one would want.

I recently bookmarked a lovely quote on HN.

Life is mostly froth and bubble, Two things stand like stone. Kindness in another's trouble, Courage in your own. -- Adam Lindsay Gordon

Re: How not to say the wrong thing (2013)

Re: How not to say the wrong thing (2013)