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To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

nytimes.com

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Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#51

Post by cachvico »

tmuir wrote: post #14

There was an author named Allen Carr, an Englishman, I believe, who wrote a book called The EasyWay to Quit Smoking. I can attest to the relative ease his method provides, over quitting cold turkey. Essentially, he uses tools of psychology to reinforce his points, such as spaced repetition, but he also dissects the psychology at play inside the smoker's mind. He frames nicotene addiction as a state of brainwashing, a…

> He is the one who wants the nicotene, he is the one freaking out, not me. I'm breathing deeply, and smelling food again.

That almost sounds like a Buddhist approach.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#52

Post by btrettel »

fro0116 wrote: post #45
btrettel wrote: post #18

The linked article seems to suggest that you can replace bad habits with arbitrary other habits. Maybe that's true, but I think it's best to change your situation so that the right choice is the easiest to make. I've discussed this in the context of transportation cycling at HN in the past: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=16515129 > As a transportation cyclist, some people I know think I must have superhuman wil…

> I think it's best to change your situation so that the right choice is the easiest to make. Lowering the activation energy required to do cardio by getting my own treadmill in the living room really helped me get into the habit of doing cardio more regularly. Now instead of paying every month for a gym membership I rarely used, I end up doing a good 3-4 hours of light cardio every week, opportunistically, because i…

Glad to hear getting a treadmill worked for you. "Activation energy" is a great phrase to use here. I'll adopt it in my own conversations.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#53

Post by tmuir »

ninjakeyboard wrote: post #41
tmuir wrote: post #24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've read that Carr's business expanded to several other vices. The two I know of are alcohol abuse, and overeating. What I've read about them makes me think of the story from WWII, placing armor on areas of planes that were _not_ getting shot, instead of the areas getting shot. It is only the planes that came back to be repaired that got shot in superficial locations. Others got shot where it counted, but couldn't r…

Ya for me that book didn't resonate at all. I thought it was a piece of trash and don't understand how anyone could actually go in without some skepticism about the shit he's feeding you. I still vape, have to wear a nicotine patch at work to focus, etc, so obviously my attitude toward that book was the problem. IMO it's just a bunch of drivel but if people read it and believe it they swear it to be true. To be clear…

Carr specifically addresses this point in the book. He said that he was hurt to find out that after he'd published his book, and gave signed copies to friends, in the hope they would quit, many of his friends never even started the book. One of them finally admitted to him that they knew if they finished the book, they'd have to quit. So to prevent that, they just never started the book.

He also approaches the subject from the angle of timing, and that stressful periods may be more difficult, because stress is one of the triggers. Or at least we convince our selves it removes stress.

So I 100% agree that just like learning anything else you have to be willing to hear the information and process it without just dismissing it out of hand. Somewhat related is the Upton Sinclair quote, "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it”.

I totally went in with tons of skepticism. Here's some huckster telling me theres a secret way. Yeah, ok. But I guess after reading enough of it, I started to realize that I had become really good at coming up with excuses, and that skill was being used against me to keep smoking. In my view, he made a persuasive argument, and wasn't trying to sell me more shit. By the time I finished the book, I was completely convinced that he was correct, even though I had not yet had my last cigarette.

I also read the book over two days, so I really got the whole message in a short amount of time, as opposed to reading a page or two a day for six months.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#54

Post by tmuir »

cachvico wrote: post #51
tmuir wrote: post #14

There was an author named Allen Carr, an Englishman, I believe, who wrote a book called The EasyWay to Quit Smoking. I can attest to the relative ease his method provides, over quitting cold turkey. Essentially, he uses tools of psychology to reinforce his points, such as spaced repetition, but he also dissects the psychology at play inside the smoker's mind. He frames nicotene addiction as a state of brainwashing, a…

> He is the one who wants the nicotene, he is the one freaking out, not me. I'm breathing deeply, and smelling food again. That almost sounds like a Buddhist approach.

There are certainly common aspects, such as mantras, and the general motivation for meditating, vs seizing control of your mind, to not let it be lead by the cigarette.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#55

Post by mod »

jackgolding wrote: post #42
scarface74 wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I agree completely. I spent years as a fitness instructor and worked out regularly. Life happened, I stopped teaching and working out consistently for five years and everything went south, weight, blood pressure, strength, cardio, cholesterol, etc. I tried to "turn things around" and failed. First step first 6 months - I cut back on fried foods, salty foods, burgers, and sweets and kept a sane calorie budget. Along w…

I drank probably 1L of diet soda a day while loosing 90 lbs over 6 months, necessary evil I say!

I'm currently losing weight. 40lbs since Thanksgiving. I drink about 2L per day of diet soda, which is my only fluid intake.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#56

Post by saintPirelli »

baxtr wrote: post #33

I’ve been able to reduce my time on news websites dramatically by developing the habit of opening the kindle app instead. Now I (mostly) continue to read my books instead of reading nonsense.

I do the same thing (with physical copies, I don't have a kindle). It's amazing how much more knowledge you can gather by just doing that one thing. Plus the delayed gratification when you look at a pile of books and think to yourself: "Wow, I read all that?"

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#57

Post by aryehof »

tmuir wrote: post #14

There was an author named Allen Carr, an Englishman, I believe, who wrote a book called The EasyWay to Quit Smoking. I can attest to the relative ease his method provides, over quitting cold turkey. Essentially, he uses tools of psychology to reinforce his points, such as spaced repetition, but he also dissects the psychology at play inside the smoker's mind. He frames nicotene addiction as a state of brainwashing, a…

The way I stopped smoking after 20 years of 30 a day, was to consciously imagine negative things each time I smoked one (and remembered to do it).

I would think of how bad they could taste first thing in the morning sometimes, a mental image of a stale full ashtray close up together with the bad smell of it, and a slight feeling of gagging and throwing up one sometimes experienced. All while continuing to puff away without restraint.

Over time, I noticed I was not finishing an increasing number of cigarettes entirely, and that I was feeling a bit sick. I reinforced that negative feeling when I noticed it.

Eventually I just... stopped. When I thought of a cigarette I felt bad and the negative feelings would overtake me. I would call it stopping without trying. I wonder if this is a form of thought "replacement".

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#58

Post by besasam »

dwaltrip wrote: post #30
blunte wrote: post #2

Here is a much more powerful proof that changing environment can help you change yourself. https://jamesclear.com/heroin-habits

Synopsis: 95% of U.S. soldiers addicted to heroin during the Vietnam War broke their addiction nearly overnight , when they returned home to the states. Only 5% relapsed back into addiction. Apparently, relapse rates for heroin clinics are normally around 90%. When the soldiers changed environments to a place that contained none of the stimuli-triggers for heroin usage that they had overseas, they found it far easier…

There was also a study done on rats that showed they would not seek out drugs when in an a nurturing and stimulating environment. Kurzgesagt have made a great video about it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ao8L-0nSYzg

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#59

Post by besasam »

goldenkey wrote: post #29
mirimir wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's arguably impossible to "stop being anxious". I mean, the harder one tries, the more anxiety. But it is possible to redirect, even in public. Perhaps adopt a centered stance. Or do something else that's unobtrusive and nonthreatening. Maybe even smile.

It is possible via behavioral therapy. Most social anxiety stems from a lack of previous success in social situations. Once you realize that people don't bite, you stop giving a shit. The public is mostly oblivious and distracted. If you think you are getting attention its far more likely that no one cares. Source: introvert who isn't scared of the mopey public anymore

There's a difference between being an introvert and having (clinical) social anxiety. It's an irrational fear and no amount of "realizing" will help with that. Cognitive behavioral therapy however will teach you to recognize thought patterns and channel them elsewhere, but that's something entirely different from "stopping giving a shit".

Source: extrovert with lots of anxiety who loves the public but still gets irrationally scared of it at times

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#60

Post by simonsquiff »

fyfy18 wrote: post #38

Has anyone got any tips for how to stop biting nails? This technique sounds like it would work for some habits, but I do this subconciously without realising - usually when I’m deep in though on something else (not when I’m streased).

I stopped a bad nail biting habit.

Started by having a single nail that I wouldn't bite - all the others were fair game. You start becoming quite obsessed with that one, noticing how much better it looks than the others etc, and being proud of how that one is unbitten.

Then simply extend that to 2 nails etc

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