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The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

theatlantic.com

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Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#51

Post by saiya-jin »

dba7dba wrote: post #29
dclowd9901 wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And they kept saying "I didn't want to uproot my family blah blah." Is there no value in exposing your children to unique and different experiences? I'll have failed if my kids grew up in the same town/city all their lives.

>> I'll have failed if my kids grew up in the same town/city all their lives. I grew up in a family that had to move around a lot, to the point where I attended 3 different elementary schools, 2 different junior highs and 1 high school. We were not rich but poor. And I SO WISH I had grown up in same neighborhood so that I could've have made some friends in my childhood. You can go live in different towns/cities when…

fully agree, stability first. mine story is similar. one can travel for rest of his/her life if wanted, but friends from childhood/teenage years are often something special and irreplaceable in life. if you don't nourish those relationships, usually they fade away.

you're not doing anybody any favor dragging kids around the world because of your crappy career goals, it's just being selfish.

If you want to be super good parent, take them each year for a month long vacation somewhere far and exotic (ie very different than their usual environment), that's more than enough.

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#52

Post by kaitai »

hobos_delight wrote: post #43
chubot wrote: post #21

Sorry to use this occasion to brag about my commutes for the last 10+ years: 6 miles, 4 miles, 2 miles, and 4 miles. For the last 7+ years it's been 100% by bike. A 20-25 minute bike ride is actually better than a shorter commute because you get just enough exercise every day.

Almost 1 year ago I gave up a 90-minute each way train commute in Sydney for a 20-minute cycle commute in Ireland (obviously there were other factors). I love the freedom to come and go when I please, and not be held up by seemingly random infrastructure failures that can ruin your whole evening. I've actually found myself extending the bike route to get a bit more exercise in (when it's not lashing that is).

Yep. When's the last time a crash on the bike lane added 40 minutes to your commute (unless it was your crash)? Construction on the bike lane = extensive detour? Nope.

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#54

Post by dagw »

skrause wrote: post #49
raz32dust wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Picture this - you could be sleeping in the car while it drives itself. It doesn't sound so ridiculous then. Anyway, I think telecommuting is going to be the norm pretty soon. Commutes would themselves be rare. They might be a lot longer though.

Honestly, how many people can get up in the morning, get ready for work, go to a car and then just fall asleep again? I guess the percentage of people who will be able to sleep on a commute will be quite low; I know I wouldn't be able to do that.

And even if you could, would you really want to go directly from waking up to being at your desk?

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#55

Post by cjhopman »

paulojreis wrote: post #50

Tangentially to the article, this whole sacrifice of personal life is starting to make me think about other options. And I don't even work long hours. Last week I had to travel, to work abroad for that week. To be there on Monday morning, I flew Sunday just after lunch. I missed around 25% of my weekend and all the "after-work" time and activities I usually have. I just moved (within the same city, a few days before…

It seems that the author assumes that readers uderstand that the comparison is between the described lives/jobs with ones in the past where it was basically you never see your family (or, more likely, you don't have one).

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#56

Post by saiya-jin »

lrvick wrote: post #31

If you are optimising for having nice accommodations for your family, but never see them, you get points as a provider I guess, but you fail at being a parent or spouse. I would of waaaay rather of lived in a trailer, and grown up actually having a father around, instead of some distant workaholic male figure that is the "great provider" that allowed an upper middle class lifestyle. For some I feel being far away mak…

... and by providing kids too much you actually spoil them easily and make... worse people out of them? or more likely they don't reach their potential as human beings, at least not that easily.

I mean, look around you, there are usually plenty of people who had it damn easy in life. this generates weakness. I am very happy I had to work my way up by myself, no cash cushion, no free apartment when turning 18 etc.it builds character to rely only on oneself, a priceless and one of most important lessons in life.

I say give kids good sporting equipment, give them free quality education (tricky bit in some places, but more expensive isn't automatically better for them), love them, support them and give them freedom, and you are excellent parent. rest is up to them.

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#57

Post by paulojreis »

cjhopman wrote: post #55
paulojreis wrote: post #50

Tangentially to the article, this whole sacrifice of personal life is starting to make me think about other options. And I don't even work long hours. Last week I had to travel, to work abroad for that week. To be there on Monday morning, I flew Sunday just after lunch. I missed around 25% of my weekend and all the "after-work" time and activities I usually have. I just moved (within the same city, a few days before…

It seems that the author assumes that readers uderstand that the comparison is between the described lives/jobs with ones in the past where it was basically you never see your family (or, more likely, you don't have one).

Yeah, sure, ergo tangentially.

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#58

Post by shalmanese »

iamphilrae wrote: post #41
dclowd9901 wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And they kept saying "I didn't want to uproot my family blah blah." Is there no value in exposing your children to unique and different experiences? I'll have failed if my kids grew up in the same town/city all their lives.

I grew up in the same small Scottish town my whole life, as did all my friends. I'm now 32, live in London, have travelled the world, but best of all, I still very regularly see my old school friends. Giving kids culture growing up is one thing, but giving them the gift of being friends with the same people since they were 3 is amazing. My uni friends have come and gone, I barely see them, but I see my old school mat…

Different strokes. We moved all over the place as a kid and I felt like it immensely broadened my horizons and gave me a richer life. I feel like I learned a great deal of humility through the experience, seeing radically different world views contrasted side by side gave me the ability to dissect my own beliefs and know just how fallible they could be.

Re: The Rise of the Outrageously Long Commute

#60

Post by tsotha »

iamphilrae wrote: post #41
dclowd9901 wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And they kept saying "I didn't want to uproot my family blah blah." Is there no value in exposing your children to unique and different experiences? I'll have failed if my kids grew up in the same town/city all their lives.

I grew up in the same small Scottish town my whole life, as did all my friends. I'm now 32, live in London, have travelled the world, but best of all, I still very regularly see my old school friends. Giving kids culture growing up is one thing, but giving them the gift of being friends with the same people since they were 3 is amazing. My uni friends have come and gone, I barely see them, but I see my old school mat…

I agree with this. My dad was in the military, and we moved every three or four years. I was always jealous of kids who had lifelong friends, and tired of always being the new guy.
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