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Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
471–480 of 890 posts
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#472Earlier quoted context omitted.
Well, he does actually look like that. And he’s only 25, so he’s still a bit arrogant :-) But, what he’s saying agrees with my experience, at three times his age: train with weights, have a caloric deficit emphasizing low carb, and walk for an hour on the days you aren’t lifting. https://physiqonomics.com/cardio-or-weights/
You can't have a caloric deficit as a long-term lifestyle choice: eventually you would waste away. But perhaps it's good advice anyway because most people could benefit from it in the short term.
He actually has content on how to stop a low-deficit diet once your happy with your weight.
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#473Man, this is the WORST place to ask for advice. A quick scan of the suggestions: * Have you tried medicating these feelings away? * Have you tried drugs? * Get on a plane! Travel and "find yourself!" * You have money, why aren't you happy? * How about you do everything again that brought you to this place... But in a different career field? About the only real suggestion here is to exercise, find a hobby, or start a…
Can you say a bit more about what happened when you confronted these feelings?
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#474Focus on your health of course, find some hobbies u can get immersed in (away from the computer), spend time thinking about your spiritual well-being. Spend more time outside.
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#475Hey no worries. I'm turning 30 in a couple days and have zero fucking dollars left. I hear philanthropy makes ppl feel better :)
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#476Earlier quoted context omitted.
Well, he does actually look like that. And he’s only 25, so he’s still a bit arrogant :-) But, what he’s saying agrees with my experience, at three times his age: train with weights, have a caloric deficit emphasizing low carb, and walk for an hour on the days you aren’t lifting. https://physiqonomics.com/cardio-or-weights/
You can't have a caloric deficit as a long-term lifestyle choice: eventually you would waste away. But perhaps it's good advice anyway because most people could benefit from it in the short term.
After few years of training and being lead by a personal trainer and a dietician I'd add one thing:
It's crucial to have a high BMR - basal metabolic rate, when going into a deficit.
Any deficit will cause body to lower the BMR and, if it's going into Body is very adaptable and will just shut down any energy hungry "facilities": lower body temperature ("I'm cold all the time", "I always have cold last two fingers"), increase sleep duration, decrease immune responses ("Why I get flu all the time in season, while others don't?") and so on.
It will loose fat, but if BMR is low, then it's also in the shock mode, where it will want to get that back as fast as possible, with some extra. That's how the yoyo effect work on physiological level.
So, start cutting on BMR of 2500-3000. It won't drop into dangerous levels and will be lower impact on the body
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#477You may feel lost, but what you are not is old. Ask yourself what you want to do with the other half of your life.
You sound professionally successful (you've done different things, so you have learned, you've got savings), but perhaps left without a purpose. It's good that these questions come up, maybe your brain is alerting you to the fact that something is still missing in your life. I encourage you to initiate that search, there is a lot more out there under the sun beyond technology - the other commenters contain many suggestions about activity, however I would like to focus on people.
Your description focuses on yourself (not sure if this is a random effect or systematic, since I don't know you); I wonder if you could benefit from looking around you and helping and caring for others. That would put you in a position to make forming your own family more likely, and make it more likely to remain a stable bond that provides fulfilment and purpose.
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#478Earlier quoted context omitted.
Although life starts for a lot of people at 35, I envy those people who are able to start much earlier. These are the people who have their first relationships in high school and college, find their life partner in early twenties, get the right job, a house, kids, keep their friend circle, invest money as early as possible, god damn. They live perfect fuckin lives and it’s all because they bravely jumped in and embra…
I would be careful with that line of thinking. We often envy illusion. We don't truly know that 'those people' are living nearly as wonderful a life as we're inclined to think they are. Further, in my experience, the "perfect life" is always one moment away from "disaster" - be it a health complication, sudden loss, or any of the myriad of ways things go awry. Pain and suffering is not something any of us seems likel…
i mean the gist of the post is right most things are better then
> rather than mope around being shy, playing too many video games, jacking off into oblivion,
even if their lives are not perfect there are better ways to spend your time then this
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#479I am way way older than you are. I went through episodes like that multiple times. There was always a trigger, work related or personal.
This is depression. Seek medical help. Find a good therapist to talk you. Get 10-15 sessions. Find the root of the problems. But the most important thing to do is talk. Don't go to social media, HN, or whatever. Bars, concerts are to be avoided. When you are there you'll get the feeling that you don't belong.
Medication can also help on a temporary basis until you find that you can get back feelings you had in your 20's.
The worst thing you can do is nothing. It will not go away. If it does, it will come back.
I guarantee that after you seek medical help and handle that with a therapist you will gradually feel more excited about life, there are so many wonderful things to do, experience and good people to meet.
Good luck.
Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?
#480Earlier quoted context omitted.
Don’t know why you’re being downvoted. Sounds like there are a lot of resentful childless population here on HN. The OP asked for advices and someone’s giving it. Chill folks
Oh, I fully expected it. And let me be the first to say, a lot of people are having kids at the wrong time and with the wrong people, which is worse than waiting. But IMHO there is a huge cultural malaise with individual psychological consequences in developed nations not promoting childbearing, even in ones with strong social safety nets.
I see more dogs at the parks and beaches these days than kids. People think not having kids is in their own self interest. I think they are terribly mistaken even though it is very counterintuitive.