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Are we the baddies?

geohot.github.io

431–440 of 554 posts

Re: Are we the baddies?

#431
post #299

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> blunt every aspect of your personality that may be an “ick.” That’s not what was meant and you know it. Ten years into a relationship, I sometimes leave my dinner dishes in the sink and wash them in the morning. Had I done that early on in my relationship—or had those dishes in a photo on a dating site—I’d sabotage my chances with a lot of people. The same is true for interests. Maybe you really like guns: marksman…

>That’s not what was meant and you know it. I believe the zoomer interpretation of "icks" refers to childish/petty reasons to give up on perusing someone, not something like lack of cleanliness.

The zoomer interpretation of "ick" is just an extension of patriarchal attitudes. It means "anything that does not perform masculinity to an adequate degree". Fruity drinks, splitting bills, wearing strange colors or patterns, even having well-groomed nails.

It's childish, it's petty, and it's self-defeating. Most women I know are in a vicious cycle of misogyny because they actively optimize for misogynistic men without knowing it. They then come to the conclusion that men must suck, so they tighten their "standards", which inadvertently results in even more misogynistic men going for them.

We often hear about gen-z men becoming more conservative but anyone who is paying attention knows that gen-z women are also becoming more conservative. And, a lot of the conservatism in men is in response to growing conservative attitudes in women, and vice-versa. We have trad wives and bio-essentialist ideology because conservative men exist. And they exist because they meet our arbitrary patriarchal standards, even the small ones, like paying for the bill.

Re: Are we the baddies?

#432
post #11

Before you pay for boosts on a dating app, pay for good pictures. Here is what a man seeking woman profile needs: 1. Good Pictures. Honest. Good lighting. Appropriate grooming and attire (whatever than means in your social context). Smile in a carefree way in most of the pictures. 2. Attractive man in the pictures. 3. No icks. Yes the pictures are more important than being attractive. As a matter of storytelling, the…

There is also an alternative strategy. Cut out the bullshit and doomed-to-fail relationships by putting your 'icks' front and center. That is a fishing for the niche situation though.

Re: Are we the baddies?

#433
post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It makes no sense to have a high risk of getting blasted all over local Facebook groups/Instagram/Tiktok for daring to approach while being ugly when they can use dating apps for zero risk. And if dating apps feel expensive to use, then there is Photofeeler also to validate your attractiveness.

You are seriously overthinking this shit.

They are, but they're correct that attitudes have changed.

People largely do not want to be approached in public and actively take steps to make sure it doesn't happen. Simple things like not making eye contact, or wearing headphones everywhere.

The reason men don't approach women in public anymore isn't some crazy conspiracy or anything - it's because women have told them to stop. Both implicitly through behavior and body language, and explicitly by saying "do not approach us in public".

It's complicated, because a lot of men do not know how to be normal or respectful. So who can blame women for being wary? But, the result now is that if you do choose that approach, you're coming in with an implicit bias against that behavior. You sort of have to work harder to overcome that bias, and for a lot of situations you just won't. Which is fine, just try again later, but that's what's going on.

Re: Are we the baddies?

#434
post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> If you know which car you want to buy it doesn't matter what the salesman has to say. Sure it does. The salesman may have information you were not aware of. They could even tell you something which satisfies your needs better and is cheaper. Not all salesman are out to screw you, some really care about a happy customer. I’m reminded of an old Hypercritical episode. If you ever heard John Siracusa, you know he does…

How intensively can you possibly have researched if a salesman mentioning an entire category of display technology is a curve ball for you.

> How intensively can you possibly have researched

Listen to it. Start way before the given timestamp.

Re: Are we the baddies?

#435

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you change the domain to xcancel.com, you can see twitter stuff without being on twitter. The tweet claims a startup built an ai cheating tool, another ripped them off, then a YC backed start up ripped the second group off. The YC backed guy claims he isn't worried about legal because he got the license from gpt. (Wouldn't that be killer evidence in a lawsuit that the defendant didn't even attempt due diligence?)…

Thank you for the summary; I appreciate it. I’m not really sure how it applies here though.

No problem. I'm basically in the same boat on relevance.

I guess the YC backed guy shows the sort of carelessness that often leads to enshitification?

Re: Are we the baddies?

#436

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Do you really view people who tip as “losers”? Do your friends know you think of them that way? What a depressing way to live…

My friends are secure happy people. They laugh off banter easily. It’s part of why we’re all friends and all doing well in life.

Gotcha, I guess I missed the playful wink ;)

Re: Are we the baddies?

#437
post #319

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> We should not underestimate the timeless human response to being manipulated: disengagement. It's worth adding that "disengagement" does not mean "not giving a f*ck", and I worry that it isn't a good human response either. So what's the difference between "not giving a f*ck" and "disengagement"? I think where the former works on the individual level, the latter is supposed to work on the collective level. I'm no sc…

You can spell out "fuck" here, we’re all adults. And the president does it on live TV too!

[deleted]

Re: Are we the baddies?

#438
post #36

We should not underestimate the timeless human response to being manipulated: disengagement. This isn't theoretical, it's happening right now. The boom in digital detoxes, the dumbphone revival among young people, the shift from public feeds to private DMs, and the "Do Not Disturb" generation are all symptoms of the same thing. People are feeling the manipulation and are choosing to opt out, one notification at a tim…

> disengagement. That disengagement metric is valuable, I'm not gonna give it away for free anymore. I'll engage and disengage randomly, so no one knows what works. > The boom in digital detoxes, the dumbphone revival among young people That's a market now. It doesn't mean shit. It's a "lifestyle". > People are feeling the manipulation They don't. Even manipulation awareness is a market now. I'm sure there are YouTub…

> Those are the interesting questions.

Not to me. I don't want to manipulate the manipulators. I just want to not be manipulated. I want to be able to go through my day without having to fight off manipulation in order to do and be what I want to do and be.

The goal is my freedom, not to "stick it to the man" in some way that won't actually matter to them.

Re: Are we the baddies?

#439

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The salesman can cut the car you want from your buying options, or stick conditions on it that will make up for the difference with the other models. That's what we're seeing with Youtube for instance: your choice is to pay Youtube's price for Premium (litteraly paying to not get bullied), sit through all the ads in the world, or get three strikes after playing the ad-blocking cat and mouse game for long enough. Of c…

> get three strikes after playing the ad-blocking cat and mouse game for long enough I've never encountered this. What is it?

People using subpar ad blockers mostly, or more than one.

Re: Are we the baddies?

#440
post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> If you know which car you want to buy it doesn't matter what the salesman has to say. Sure it does. The salesman may have information you were not aware of. They could even tell you something which satisfies your needs better and is cheaper. Not all salesman are out to screw you, some really care about a happy customer. I’m reminded of an old Hypercritical episode. If you ever heard John Siracusa, you know he does…

The heuristic is that pretty much anyone who is trying to sell you something is out to screw you. They are probably lying, and they are probably trying to get a quick buck from people who don't know better. And when I say anyone, I mean anyone. Youtubers, anyone on TikTok who links anything, advertisements on the web, billboards. It's not 100% but if you follow the heuristic you save a lot of money and generally have…

Exactly. People say "Oh, I'm not affected by advertising, and I ignore sales pitches. I am very smart and do my own research!" But what are they researching? Marketing literature! They think they are informing themselves, but in reality, they are just seeking out marketing disguised as impartial facts.

I laugh when people say "I use site:reddit.com to scope my Google searches for product information because I'm getting impartial information from real people."

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