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Tips for a Better Life

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Re: Tips for a Better Life

#431

Post by npsimons »

caturopath wrote: post #168

> After a breakup, cease all contact as soon as practical. The potential for drama is endless, and the potential for a good friendship is negligible. Strange. It's a bit of a red flag if someone is in complete radio silence with all their exes, frankly. Obviously, you aren't going to enjoy hanging out next week, but I'm surprised you dated enough that there's a "breakup" if you don't enjoy each other enough to have s…

> It's a bit of a red flag if someone is in complete radio silence with all their exes, frankly.

Why?

> I'm surprised you dated enough that there's a "breakup" if you don't enjoy each other enough to have something to salvage.

Some relationships are mistakes; not all of us are prescient enough to know how they will work out. Other times you simply grow apart.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#432

Post by npsimons »

HexagonalKitten wrote: post #195
caturopath wrote: post #168

> After a breakup, cease all contact as soon as practical. The potential for drama is endless, and the potential for a good friendship is negligible. Strange. It's a bit of a red flag if someone is in complete radio silence with all their exes, frankly. Obviously, you aren't going to enjoy hanging out next week, but I'm surprised you dated enough that there's a "breakup" if you don't enjoy each other enough to have s…

I agree about the red-flag part for avoiding all your exes, but I also find it a red-flag when someone says how well they get along with their exes. "If so, why do you have so many , and why aren't you still with any of them?" If you were with someone with serious intent of trying to be a compatible partner, and failed despite your best efforts such that you and your partner agree the best thing is to not be together…

Honestly, I'm not in contact with any of my exes. It's not on purpose, we just grew apart and have moved on. If we happen upon a chance meeting, I'm sure we would be friendly with each other, but we're not going out of our way to seek out or avoid each other. I find these black and white rigid "rules" (such as not keeping in touch with any exes as a red flag) to be incredibly judgmental and limiting.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#433

Post by jgwil2 »

> 92. You have vanishingly little political influence and every thought you spend on politics will probably come to nothing. Consider building things instead, or at least going for a walk.

For those of us fortunate enough to live in more or less functioning democracies, this is very bad advice. Consider what our lives would be like if everyone thought this way. Instead of trying to ignore politics, maybe if you spend a lot of time thinking about it you should consider getting involved at a local level instead. Then you can be part of the solution instead of burying your head in the sand.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#434

Post by DoreenMichele »

NortySpock wrote: post #24

I think the compassion section has the most wisdom in it, especially the reasoning behind the recommendation: 82. Call your parents when you think of them, tell your friends when you love them. 83. Compliment people more. Many people have trouble thinking of themselves as smart, or pretty, or kind, unless told by someone else. You can help them out. 84. If somebody is undergoing group criticism, the tribal part in yo…

85. Cultivate compassion for those less intelligent than you. Many people, through no fault of their own, can’t handle forms, scammers, or complex situations. Be kind to them because the world is not.

Don't assume someone is not smart because they have trouble with something you find easy. People have different strengths and weaknesses and the same person you are tempted to look down upon as "dumb" may blow you out of the water on some other task.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#435

Post by watwut »

stared wrote: post #362
NortySpock wrote: post #24

I think the compassion section has the most wisdom in it, especially the reasoning behind the recommendation: 82. Call your parents when you think of them, tell your friends when you love them. 83. Compliment people more. Many people have trouble thinking of themselves as smart, or pretty, or kind, unless told by someone else. You can help them out. 84. If somebody is undergoing group criticism, the tribal part in yo…

I really like it. Used GPT-3 to expand it (T=0.7, the first trial). [PROMPT] Compassion 82. Call your parents when you think of them, tell your friends when you love them. 83. Compliment people more. Many people have trouble thinking of themselves as smart, or pretty, or kind, unless told by someone else. You can help them out. 84. If somebody is undergoing group criticism, the tribal part in you will want to join in…

86 is good advice for overly confident people, but destructive for people who are too agreeable or lack confidence.

In fact, sometimes you are right and it is ok too think you are right. It is also ok to want things, you don't have to step back every single time.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#436

Post by andreilys »

0xffff2 wrote: post #261
andreilys wrote: post #251

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Some people have spent thousands of hours perfecting their craft. To think you can produce the same output with a few hours of YouTube tutorials is laughable. I’m happy to pay these experts because I know I will get my moneys worth. It’ll also free up my time to explore things I have a higher interest and affinity for

How do you know you're hiring an expert? It's easy to find people claiming to be experts who are willing to take your money. It's virtually impossible to evaluate whether they're any good or not when you're not an expert either. If I do it myself, I might take three times as long, but at least I know what I'm going to get.

Word of mouth is a good way. Experts tend to have a portfolio of work so you can use that as your reference point.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#437

Post by throw149102 »

paulpauper wrote: post #33
NortySpock wrote: post #24

I think the compassion section has the most wisdom in it, especially the reasoning behind the recommendation: 82. Call your parents when you think of them, tell your friends when you love them. 83. Compliment people more. Many people have trouble thinking of themselves as smart, or pretty, or kind, unless told by someone else. You can help them out. 84. If somebody is undergoing group criticism, the tribal part in yo…

91. don't buy XRP but in seriousness, I think it is easier to apply these rules to people you know than strangers. Look how often people lose patience with each other online. >85. Cultivate compassion for those less intelligent than you. Many people, through no fault of their own, can’t handle forms, scammers, or complex situations. Be kind to them because the world is not. Interestingly, being smart does not protect…

I've heard before that the smarter you are, the more naive you are. The way I think about it, the smarter you are the more often you are correct about something that no one else is, which causes you to rationally place your judgement above others, which causes you to believe a bunch of nonsense. When presented with counter-evidence, you are more likely to trust your own reasoning than to trust the evidence.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#438

Post by WalterBright »

throw149102 wrote: post #437
paulpauper wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

91. don't buy XRP but in seriousness, I think it is easier to apply these rules to people you know than strangers. Look how often people lose patience with each other online. >85. Cultivate compassion for those less intelligent than you. Many people, through no fault of their own, can’t handle forms, scammers, or complex situations. Be kind to them because the world is not. Interestingly, being smart does not protect…

I've heard before that the smarter you are, the more naive you are. The way I think about it, the smarter you are the more often you are correct about something that no one else is, which causes you to rationally place your judgement above others, which causes you to believe a bunch of nonsense. When presented with counter-evidence, you are more likely to trust your own reasoning than to trust the evidence.

I was told long ago that con men like to target doctors, because doctors believe they are too smart to be scammed.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#439

Post by novia »

Smaug123 wrote: post #146
novia wrote: post #110

76. After a breakup, cease all contact as soon as practical. The potential for drama is endless, and the potential for a good friendship is negligible. Lol. Or don't date people who you wouldn't be friends with if it weren't for the sexual attraction.

Not every broken relationship started out that way!

I know, but also, not every relationship completely self destructs on the way to a breakup. Giving the advice to cease all communication with all previous romantic partners as soon as possible indicates that there are some bigger interpersonal issues to work out.

Re: Tips for a Better Life

#440

Post by [deleted] »

corytheboyd wrote: post #403
Jorengarenar wrote: post #332

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Hello! I'm in my twenties. I listen to music from vinyls, CDs and tapes. I also like to watch my VHS cassettes. Nice to meet you. (now that you know about me, you cannot say you don't know about anybody who still uses CDs)

Well there you have it :P Do enough of your friends do the same? It was just interesting to see this so high on your list hah

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