411–418 of 418 posts
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Heh. Let's revisit this in a decade.
Surely if age has made you so much more wise, you would be prepared to express that wisdom.
On the other hand, if age has inflated your ego to the point you are unwilling to even consider a different perspective, then why are you here?
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Careful you don't hurt yourself getting down from that high horse of yours. I guess alternatively you could just keep living up there, but it sounds lonely. OOC, what in the initial message makes you think I was angry when I'm telling you I was not? (Oh all-knowing-being who can tell me what's inside my head that I cannot even see)
the other person also thought you were angry.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Heh. Let's revisit this in a decade.
Is that what you would have told me if I said I was 19? Surely if age has made you so much more wise, you would be prepared to express that wisdom. On the other hand, if age has inflated your ego to the point you are unwilling to even consider a different perspective, then why are you here?
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Is that what you would have told me if I said I was 19? Surely if age has made you so much more wise, you would be prepared to express that wisdom. On the other hand, if age has inflated your ego to the point you are unwilling to even consider a different perspective, then why are you here?
I'm absolutely able to consider a different perspective! I simply disagree with you. Maybe in ten years, I will have changed my mind. Who knows? We'll see.
I can understand you disagreeing with me. That's fine.
But where is the substance of that disagreement? All I see right now is indifference: you have discounted my opinion, not rejected it.
The purpose of discussions like this is objectivity: we don't need to wait around to be proven wrong when we can confront the ideas head on now.
I don't like anyone as much as I like my wife, straight up. It's incredible to have a partner that acts as my actual 'other half'. We are two sides of the same coin. It's an amazing thing. I can't, nor do I want to, get that close to other people.
That doesn't always happen though. I feel the most lonely when I'm alone with my wife. We can only have a back and forth conversation on topics that interest her, or the day to day of the house/kids, anything outside those things is just never discussed or is a one-way conversation that just dies. I was friendless and grew up with the same 15 boys until the end of highschool, never fit in. Married the first girl who…
I'd suggest doing everything in your power, even if it means completely breaking your obviously well-fortified comfort zones of personal conduct, to change how you live your own life. Find new activities for yourself, try to meet new people (friends I mean, but don't exclude the possibility of someone that sparks your romantic side) and create a new personal internal and external dynamic of interesting experiences for your mind and body. Work at these persistently, and if after having made progress in these things, you still can't make yourself connect with your wife on some deeper level that goes beyond the banal nightmare your describe, then leave her. You will be cushioned at least somewhat, by having already made inroads into your own self-improvement over the life you've lived so far and the type of life you described from before meeting her.
The economic costs of this will be heavy maybe, but they're nothing compared to, as you say in another reply, living like this "till your dying day", because that would be a miserable day indeed and at the end of a whole miserable life of missed opportunity for new textures of experience that were likely always within your reach.
Having children certainly complicates the above, but you absolutely can escape your situation and still work to keep a good relationship with your kids. Millions of divorced people do it over a lifetime, and usually without major traumas or loss of quality experiences with their own kids.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'm absolutely able to consider a different perspective! I simply disagree with you. Maybe in ten years, I will have changed my mind. Who knows? We'll see.
If that's the case, then what are you waiting for? I can understand you disagreeing with me. That's fine. But where is the substance of that disagreement? All I see right now is indifference : you have discounted my opinion, not rejected it. The purpose of discussions like this is objectivity : we don't need to wait around to be proven wrong when we can confront the ideas head on now.