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Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

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Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#411

Post by lightedman »

dang wrote: post #58
dmoy wrote: post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

To be fair on the last part, shadow ban can be an extremely efficient moderation tool, though for people caught up as false positive collateral damage it can really suck. This is true even in hackernews I would assume, certainly it is any other place I've moderated before.

When an account is established, we usually tell people we're banning them and why. Shadowbanning on HN is mostly for new accounts that show signs of either spamming or trolling. You're right, though, that there are still false positives in such cases, and those suck.

"Shadowbanning on HN is mostly for new accounts that show signs of either spamming or trolling."

You routinely shadowban people you disagree with. Or post-limit them. You don't get to act innocent here when I guarantee you're just as guilty of these dark patterns as every other site.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#412

Post by dang »

jayalpha wrote: post #383
magduf wrote: post #368

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands, and as a man I've had plenty of success finding women to date (not so much in finding someone I have any interest in marrying though; there aren't that many attractive women left in the US at this age (because Americans are fat), and the ones who are left ha…

"Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands," Well, these women in her 40s rode the cock carousel far too long....

> these women in her 40s rode the cock carousel far too long

Not cool. Please don't do this on HN.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#413

Post by ChuckNorris89 »

akuji1993 wrote: post #258
zapnuk wrote: post #219

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's the idea behind bumble. AFAIK men and women rate each other similarly to Tinder (yes/no). However, when a match occurs, women have to send the first message. This doesn't solve the gender inbalance though. This problem is much more difficult to solve, and requires further homogenization (?) of the male and female gender role. This should be one of the more important challenges of our time. Lonelyness and sexua…

The reality for someone like me, a very average looking guy, is then that I get zero messages. Doesn't really solve anything either.

I'm also an average looking guy but got successful from learning pickup IRL.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#414

Post by lucaspm98 »

dhnsmakala wrote: post #99
fortran77 wrote: post #55

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It would be nice to have a dating site where potential matches were verified, including height, weight, and photo. Perhaps have them visit a kiosk in a participating business to get a photo taken from a standard angle (no "myspace" angles) along with a verified height and weight (stand on a scale!)

Is people misrepresenting themselves something you encounter frequently? Seems like a short sighted move.

It's completely understandable to put yourself out there as the best version of yourself, but yes I have frequently seen people exaggerating themselves to the point of misrepresentation.

You see profiles with only pictures that clearly were taken 5-10 years ago, or only picture of the face with a filter so heavy they are barely recognizable. It is certainly short sighted because you can only hide behind a carefully curated profile for so long. If I was looking for a dating service I would certainly pay for one with just verified, unedited photos. At some point this could get creepy but other stats like height, age, and weight could be optionally verifiable and public.

If this could save me from even one awkward date a year with someone I don't find even remotely physically compatible it would easily be worth it.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#415

Post by chrift »

jrnichols wrote: post #410

I have no doubt that Tinder is also loaded with fake profiles to encourage user engagement as well.

I am also of the mind that all the social media platforms do this. I hardly ever use Instagram, but whenever I get a notification from someone I know is obviously fake I always get caught in the rabbit hole of my feed.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#416

Post by RandomBacon »

derefr wrote: post #375
mcv wrote: post #213

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think the most effective way to stand out is for women to contact men. With men spamming all women with meaningless messages, there's little point for women to respond to men contacting them. But if a man received a message from a woman, it's more likely they're real and not a fake profile, and that they're actually interested. But dating sites that create fake profiles and use all these dark patterns to try to con…

One simple technique a dating website could use to “disrupt” this market, without doing the only-women-can-contact thing, would be just to disallow men (or anyone) from sending messages with the same content as any message that person has sent previously.

How long until we get messages like:

> Hey!

> djdjrntbdjc

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#417

Post by rootusrootus »

I wonder if I would be successful today, were I looking for someone using an online service. 11 years ago I met my wife on Match, and I had had dated a few other people from the site before I met her. I am just average looking for sure, maybe these days I wouldn't get any responses at all.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#418

Post by RandomBacon »

thrower123 wrote: post #271
Blackstone4 wrote: post #263

Earlier quoted context omitted.

From what I understand, it didn't entirely solve the problem since the behavior of men has evolved. Some of my friends are swiping right on everything to get matches and seeing what sticks.

Men are setting up emulator rigs to swipe right in parallel.

The app should create a fake account listed as a woman, but with a picture of a man and the text: Fake Account

Ban anyone who swipes right on it.

Or limit the amount of right swipes allowed per day.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#419

Post by notyourday »

LeonM wrote: post #292
notyourday wrote: post #272

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. In my empirical observation it is not correct. Dating is local. The proportion of men and women on the sites in a locality will roughly match the proportion of men to women in the dating pool…

I agree that dating is basically marketing for yourself. But dating sites are there for those who are generally bad at that. The requirement of marketing 101 to be successful on a dating site kind of defeats the purpose.

Let's see if we can apply this to finding a job. You need to do marketing.

Let's see if we can apply this to filling a job. You need to do marketing.

Let's see if we can apply this to selling a watches in a store? You need to do marketing.

Let's see if we can apply this to selling your specific CBD online? You need to do marketing.

Why would you think that dating would be different?

Dating sites are the top of the funnel. You still need to close the "sale". To do that one has one of the two options: time to experiment and develop sales tactics or have the needed resources. I do not know what Evan's "style" was if any but him being a billionaire definitely helped to close the deal with Miranda.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#420

Post by CuriouslyC »

claudiawerner wrote: post #161
CuriouslyC wrote: post #111

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The people on dating apps aren't really bad. The problem is the male-female asymmetry. On most dating sites men outnumber women five to tenfold. Additionally, most guys will spam likes and messages to hundreds of women. The hyper selectivity of women on these sites is mostly the result of trying to keep their heads above water. You should be aware that the "experiments" people have posted online aren't necessarily un…

Although I don't condone the "experiments" (of which the bias shouldn't be a concern so long as they're accurately presenting the data - you can't get much more accurate than screenshots, which out of the principle of charity it makes some sense to give credence to at first glance) I wouldn't blame men for feeling bitter and loveless after online dating experience. You'll find countless men (and women, but for differ…

Part of the problem is that people feel creepy for being interested in the opposite sex in the first place. And that society on some twisted level condones that idea. A lot of guys have responded to modern feminism and the MeToo movement by turning into sexless soyboys who are so hung up on not being creepy (which is itself kind of creepy) that they are incapable of hitting on girls.

As for attractiveness, people have a lot more control over it than they realize. Lose weight, get fit, get your teeth fixed, find your best hair/beard style and develop a cool look, and you can probably be hot unless you have a face like Sloth from The Goonies.

I will admit though, even as a hot guy with good game, I still have a hard time on Tinder. I get a decent number of likes, but not many matches, as the vast majority of them are from women that don't meet my standards. I can pull 1-2 new dates a week from OkCupid, but I've never met a top tier woman there. Thankfully I'm in a relationship now with a drop-dead gorgeous woman I met due to common interests, so I can put all that behind me now.

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