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Early-Retirement Update

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Re: Early-Retirement Update

#401

Post by mettamage »

glangdale wrote: post #348

The whole thing seemed weirdly condescending towards people with normal working and spending habits, especially because it's not obvious to me what was so great about what the author was doing. The dude hung out for a few years, failed to become a writer, and did some travel, bored his partner to tears, and ... "sucked down an awful lot of media — movies, video games, books", then learned the shit that normal people…

You're leaving out that he mentioned that a lot of his friends weren't really into their work and used shopping as a way to alleviate that form of suffering, at least that's what he seems to believe.

Maybe I read too much into that part, I've certainly seen it with some of my friends. Some of my friends hate their job, other friends of mine are okay with their job. In any case, it isn't hard to imagine a big group of his friends being unhappy with their job.

After having read this, I kind of come to the realization that some serious research needs to be done to the psychological state of people in general and working. The results are all over the place [1]. For example, Pew Research Center seems to claim that Americans as a whole are pretty satisfied with their jobs [2], whereas an article about a Gallup poll claims that 85% isn't [3].

[1] https://www.google.com/search?q=statistics+us+people+unhappy...

[2] https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2016/10/06/3-how-a...

[3] https://www.staffsquared.com/blog/why-85-of-people-hate-thei....

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#402

Post by mettamage »

mapme wrote: post #377
bulletwolf wrote: post #171

I've got 5 years of early retirement under my belt, and I feel like I've had the inverse experience of the OP. The first two years were an incredibly difficult transition period for me. Losing the status of being a higher up at a successful (small) company was extremely painful, especially because I didn't realize how much of a perk of the job it was. Like many others in this thread, I realized work provided a venue…

Did you tame the ego via meditation? If not what other method? Curious about the path that lead to depersonalization. It’s discussed in meditation circles as a fear some have, but really, many monks and “enlightened” are interesting characters eg. Shinzen Young

I've experienced depersonalization because of meditation, and I didn't even know that: (1) what depersonalization was and (2) that it could be cultivated by meditation.

I immediately stopped meditating all together and slowly got my sense of self back. Since then I only briefly meditate when I feel I can use the benefits of it (e.g. enhanced emotional perception or more focus etc.).

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#403

Post by mettamage »

stocknoob wrote: post #103
didibus wrote: post #52

It's nice to see someone's honest thoughts. Though I can't help but find the person a little judgemental of their prior partner, or people who don't mind working. I also feel like they must have had a strange group of friends, 30k is the US median income, but it seems they only had friends making way more and also somehow being money obsessed. I do like the conclusion though, we're social animals, and the issue with…

Yep, that's the point of FI. You can pick what you want to do with your life, whether that's working or not. Those who say "I don't see the point of being FI, I want to work my entire life" is like saying "I don't see the point of a BATNA in a negotiation".

> BATNA

Best Alternative To Negotiation Agreement

I've only seen this acronym in a negotiation course at uni, I'm sure not everyone knows what it means ;-)

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#404

Post by mettamage »

happilyFIREd wrote: post #221
greedo wrote: post #208

I have a high school friend who retired around 40. He came from a family of money, but worked in corporate IT sales for a large, well known vendor. We had lost touch with each other until 5 years ago when he reached out to me via FB and wanted to call. We spoke for a few hours about our lives, and I realized he was a lost soul. He had a wife and children, and had been retired for over twenty years. His kids were now…

"Money magnifies who you already are"

I've noticed this as well when I started to get to know some rich people. Their personality seemed magnified to me compared to people with a similar personality but less money.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#405

Post by jjeaff »

mfer wrote: post #254
GordonS wrote: post #137

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Not just FIRE people, but 99% of all retirees at any age end up doing nothing of note with their time. If you spend some years just chilling and and are actually happy, then sure, why not. But there are so many retired people who do nothing, and are not happy. For example, my mother, my mother and father in law, my other father in law, my grandmother - all retired, and all do absolutely nothing but watch TV and moa…

I used to work for a company that had a newsletter. In the newsletter they listed deaths. There was a common theme that people would generally either die shortly after retiring or a long time after. Talking with some of the folks near retirement I learned that people who didn't find things to do generally died shortly after retirement. Basically, we live for work and when many people retire they loose the thing to li…

I have often heard this. And even witnessed it some. But i wonder if the phenomenon is actually due to the fact that people who are in good health and well when they retire are more likely to stay active and those who are not in good health or don't feel well, tend to not stay very busy after they no longer are required to.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#406

Post by SketchySeaBeast »

pdimitar wrote: post #248
SketchySeaBeast wrote: post #244

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You take exception to their generalizing and then generalize yourself which I'm taking exception to. I love my wife deeply, but work time apart makes our time together better. It takes all sorts.

Not at all, I said what I don't subscribe under and cited my anecdotal evidence. My "generalization" is actually putting people in groups, which by itself admits that a generalization is impossible. But it could possibly be offensive to some people that I call their couples "good roommates" which is a fair reaction -- I still have the right to my opinion however.

That's fine, but I believe I'm still allowed to take exception to it and express my opinion.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#407

Post by mettamage »

mathgladiator wrote: post #332
horsawlarway wrote: post #273

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> All the external things that money buys tend to not provide lasting happiness, and there you are stuck with yourself. We all die. I think this varies. I've had my fair share of purchases that made no difference and I'd probably not repeat if given the opportunity. But I also have a good number of purchases that made a significant difference in the quality of my life. Honestly, I LOVE (love, love love) being a homeo…

> And really - I think that's the crux of the issue. If you're doing something because someone else might judge you if you don't, or because someone else did something similar and you want to show off too... then you're probably doing it for the wrong reasons. That's it; why do we do what we do? When I mentor people, I ask three questions? (1) who are you, (2) whom do you want to become, (3) how can I help? Who we ar…

Awesome exchange this. I never understood people that wanted hardwood floors (I've never been in the position to be able to afford one, let alone make my mind wander in a way that I'd ruminate about the topic), now I get it a little better. Thanks :)

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#408

Post by mettamage »

pcglue wrote: post #257
ed25519FUUU wrote: post #187

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Another approach to FIRE that I think is actually more fulfilling is to gradually reduce working hours until "retired". For example, explore a position that lets you work 4 days a week and take Mondays or Fridays off. Later, switch to part time or contracting 6 months on 6 months off. I don't personally think gap years will be very fulfilling unless it's something like a whole family 1 year vacation where you all go…

I would absolutely love to find a software position with 24-32 hour week, but I have not heard of such a thing, short of going out on your own and freelancing. No employer I know of (in software field, I don't want to go work retail) would consider allowing employees to work part time. I have considered contracting or even freelancing too, but I've been a W2 worker my entire career. I'd have to look into how to do th…

For EU citizens, The Netherlands is totally a country where 32 hours per week is possible. The pay is also a lot lower ;-) Though, compared to a 40 hour work week, you only take a 20% pay cut (and probably get passed up on promotions, so there is an opportunity cost).

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#409

Post by silicon2401 »

kozak wrote: post #398
silicon2401 wrote: post #381

Earlier quoted context omitted.

excellent question, by f-you money I mean serious f-you money (we're daydreaming, after all), so my vision is a literal stone castle as well as a nice farm. ideally these would be maintainable just by myself so maybe a modest fort-like castle and tiny homestead farm. not necessarily a disney castle and hundreds of acres of corn. aside from the farm likely taking up all my time (for however long i'm able to sustain th…

But who will be cleaning toilets in the castle?

I have no problem cleaning my toilet; in fact, I quite enjoy cleaning. And with f-you money I'll make sure my castle has a modern toilet, or in the very worst case some kind of septic tank, rather than the medieval cesspit style toilet.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#410

Post by AlwaysRock »

hindsightbias wrote: post #308
psychiatrist24 wrote: post #130

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I regret that I never worked as a waiter in a cafe, and now it looks as if I can't afford it anymore. Or if I could afford it, I would be taking away the job from people who have a more urgent need for it than me.

There should be a class of jobs for retirees just working for health care and socialization.

Yeah this does exist/happen to some extent. My partners father retired young (40's) and spent a bunch of years kicking around doing odd little jobs. The issue for many employers is that people in these situations don't really NEED the jobs so they are less likely to stick around late or put up with any bullshit which many jobs contain plenty of.

This is just antidotal evidence of seeing my partners dad say yeah fuck that job after 6 months.

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