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We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

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41–50 of 144 posts

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#41
You live life, you leave a trail, this hasn't changed in the digital world, only made more convenient. For your kids to live in the world of the future and interact with others, they will need an identity, it is unavoidable unless they want to live off-the-grid in bush country.

We can see grade school and high school pictures of famous celebrities because pictures were taken with analog film cameras once. We can see old baby pictures of people who are 65 years old today because photography has existed for over a century.

Maybe you're not taking pictures of your daughter, but someone else will, and they can tag her with metadata for their own purposes.

I don't post my kids pictures publicly (I do to close friends), not for hyperbolic fears that someone might profile them and show them a targeted ad (The Horrors!), but because honesty, I've seen enough weirdos doing stuff with people's pictures online that I don't want them showing up on some jackass's website, especially ones people fap off to. Especially true for young girls, as there are people who steal portraits from other sites and they end up in spammy popup ads or worse.

But even that is a losing battle, as again, photos are taken everywhere by everyone. As the cost of cameras goes to zero, they will be omnipresent, and as networking becomes more and more ubiquitous, a world where you are always being filmed and classified is inevitable. It won't even require centralized governments or corporations to scale, just ordinary people filming decentralized.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#42
post #26

This seems incredibly odd to me. On one hand, they indicate strongly valued privacy with the "no posts about the child" rule; seemingly recognizing the hidden costs of permissive 'oversharing'. But, on the other hand, they place a very high importance on reserving (vanity) domain and user names, securing the right for her to sharecrop out her personal information in as-accurate-a-means as possible; reinforcing the va…

I agree with you, but I suppose the point is to make it the child's decision to share or not when they become mature enough to make that choice.

(Personally my wife and I have no information on our kids online, save a self-hosted blog with a password that only family know...).

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#43

The services you sign up for are unlikely to exist in 10 years time let alone 20.

Seriously. I have a two-year-old; I found myself wondering about how he would deal with Facebook, etc., until I realized that if he had been born in 1991 instead of 2011 I'd have been wondering how he'd deal with dial-up BBSs.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#44
I did just about everything wrong by this author's lights--posted plenty of photos and updates, gave them their own e-mail and social media accounts, etc. It didn't even occur to me to weigh their poops or do any sort of qualitative analysis of their urine! Somehow... Somehow, I says, they managed to turn out all right.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#45

> I adore Kate’s parents, and they’re raising her to be an amazing young woman. But they’re essentially robbing her of a digital adulthood that’s free of bias and presupposition. Oh god, these types of smug parents annoy the crap out of me. This is the digital version of the mom who lectures you for letting your kid watch Sesame Street or eats Frosted Flakes, because don't you know sugar/TV are going to destroy his m…

True. Also, her daughter is going to be plenty embarrassed by her mom's high-anxiety-parenting (including, but not limited to the poop-tracking) when these articles are dug up by her friends in middle school.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#46
post #27
post #14

The author is wrong because she assumes social customs are immutable. They aren't. In 2028 there will be nothing embarrassing about appearing in thousands of online photos dating back to your birth. Because almost everyone will be in the same boat. In fact, it may be considered weird and suspicious if there's not much online content about you.

> In 2028 there will be nothing embarrassing about appearing in thousands of online photos dating back to your birth. Because almost everyone will be in the same boat. Or you know, those that aren't will have it as an advantage. Like how everybody is nearly overweight, but still those are aren't have a leg up.

I'm thinking this too. She'll be one of the last people the CIA could hire as a spy.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#47
post #24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As a general rule, it's pretty safe to do "what everybody else is doing." I noticed this rule after the housing crash. If one person was underwater on their mortgage, no one would blink. But, when hundreds of thousands of people become underwater, Congress started to get involved to (attempt to) provide relief. It seems impossible to limit someone's exposure on Facebook, especially when any 3rd party will happily pos…

> I noticed this rule after the housing crash. If one person was underwater on their mortgage, no one would blink. But, when hundreds of thousands of people become underwater, Congress started to get involved to (attempt to) provide relief. Considering that hundrends of thousadns still lost their houses, it's not much of a comfort -- or good advice in general. "Do what everybody else is doing" will at best lead to me…

Yes. Something about bridge jumping.

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#48
post #11

I'm a new parent and my wife and I are not taking any measures to minimize our kid's Facebook exposure. As a general rule, it's pretty safe to "do what everybody else is doing." If Facebook albums parents made for kids when they were little come back to haunt this coming generation as a group, the ills will be remedied either by making or using certain sorts of analysis illegal (the college application hypothetical)…

> do what everybody else is doing

Obligatory Godwin law reference aside, this logic has led to many historical problems

Re: We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online

#50
I think this is, digitally, fighting the last war.

Kids grow up in their own world, not ours. The idea of checking domain names and Instagram account names before choosing the child's name is hilarious to me. Like domain names and Instagram are going to matter to teenagers 16 years from now.

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