41–50 of 71 posts
Regardless of agreeing with the advice, a 41yo giving advice on surviving the 40s seems a bit arrogant. Being 41 is different from 46 which is different from 49, and he just doesn't know yet. The right title should be "how I feel after a year in my 40s".
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You can't imagine why a forum of predominantly adult men in their late twenties to mid forties would be interested in an article about aging gracefully and maintaining warm healthy relationships with their peers?
Because it's so elementary?
I hate to admit this but balding has been a really really stressful thing for me getting into 40. I didn't think it would be, I hardly looked in the mirror at the best of times during my 20s and 30s, but I've been rapidly balding over the past 2/3 years and I can see by this time next year...I'll be bald. I'm at the point I've been considering going to turkey, but I think the most surprising thing to me is just now m…
Definitely a rough thing to struggle with.
I seem to have become scarier in my old age. People seem to pay more attention and react more strongly to me than they used to, but all I did was get older and uglier. Whatever physicality I had has waned, but moral presence among strangers has waxed. Maybe it's a remaining respect for elders rather than something to do with me. But it has made me more careful with hiding my grumpiness.
Sometime in my late 30's or early 40's I noticed that groups started deferring to me as the arbiter of disputes and decision maker. They also stopped being as playful with me. I hadn't changed my personality significantly, and I was baffled for a long time. Then I realized that I had become a 40 something man with a touch of grey and some gravel in his voice. Somewhere along the way people had just automatically star…
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You are surely privileged if you can make your living off indie software and are working for yourself where you have more flexibility on structuring your day, but I'd not call that "rich" in the regular sense.
I think in today's world, being rich just means being able to wither layoffs without becoming homeless. Building any kind of meaningful wealth for early retirement, is out of reach most people.
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it's really not. It's easy for some, sure and you're maybe one of them (or perhaps mistaken!) but many, many MANY people, especially men, even intelligent men struggle with social situations and maintaining healthy social relationships.
Be nice? Don't be a know it all? Even if you don't believe it you've surely heard people say it sometime in the last 40 years. Autism notwithstanding, and that probably accounts for a decent share of the readership
How long has it been since you called your long lost best friend and caught up? Did you go to his brothers funeral? Check in on him after his divorce? A year after his divorce? 5?
It takes effort and is far from elementary no matter how much rizz you have.