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Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

scientificamerican.com

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Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#41

Post by toomuchtodo »

dymk wrote: post #38
beaglesss wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Child support actually is a transfer payment to the custodial parent with no check any of it goes to the child, 'child support' is a misnomer like 'patriot act'. Taking care of the child is a separate consideration, it can be spent on the kids, shoes, or a case of jack daniels.

Then you can take your ex to court and get custody. It’s not like this situation wasn’t considered.

I’m paying $400/hour for someone’s divorce attorney currently, $5k retainer and will cost at least $10k-$15k in total. Due to it being a no fault state, they’ll be required to pay their ex $2500-$3000/month (not tax deductible, after tax) for at least five years (even though the ex can work and is highly educated; this is a state mandated support formula based on duration of the marriage [~10 years] and each of their incomes). Thankfully no children. This comment ignores the cost and effort required, both to reach an initial settlement and to challenge or modify ongoing custody and financial arrangements until children reach age of maturity.

Every time you’re engaging your attorney, the clock is running, and that usually isn’t the only cost.

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#42

Post by Der_Einzige »

wredue wrote: post #30
beaglesss wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Also consider the fatality rate for youth was low compared to elderly, so it must have looked like we threw their education and recreation in the wood chipper for grandma, when normally at least in modern times sacrifices are made by adults to the children not the other way around.

Yeah okay. Elders go to war, or clean up nuclear disasters to save youth from it. Your hot take: Kill granny so I can get my nails done and eat at a restaurant.

Lt governor of Texas basically said this as an old guy and his old voters who voted for him loved it!

If old people want to vote for the day of the pillow, why stop them?

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#43

Post by bryanlarsen »

toomuchtodo wrote: post #36
PhasmaFelis wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

People are expected to care for their own children, yes.

Cheaper not to have them and risk the outsized long term financial obligation. ~43% of first marriages fail, ~60% of second marriages, ~73% third marriages. Roughly half of all children will see the parents’ marriage fail or them separate (per the CDC).

Those numbers are a lot lower for people whose first marriage is in their 30s and/or those who are financially stable. (Each of those ~halves the risk of divorce).

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#44

Post by standardUser »

blowski wrote: post #40
standardUser wrote: post #39

Youth are happier with more regimentation and now they have less. Adults are happier with less regimentation and now we have... less! It's tough to be a kid in an increasingly diverse and changing society. Especially when they are on the forefront of that cultural transformation and have to face relentless attacks from a large part of the adult establishment. We probably need new and different ways to teach and engag…

> Youth are happier with more regimentation Are you saying young people like being given rules?

There's a boatload of research showing kids do better overall with structure, stability and routine.

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#46

Post by AlbertCory »

Comparing eras' difficulties is ultimately meaningless. When you're an adolescent, everything is new and for the first time (more or less). You have nothing to compare it to. Every decision you make has the potential to shape your entire life, except you don't know which ones. Nothing will ever feel like that again.

Everything else is just a footnote.

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#47

Post by khazhoux »

platz wrote: post #3
iwanttocomment wrote: post #2

Hey, Gen Z. Gen X here. I personally think this whole "young adulthood is the happiest time of your life" is some sort of bizarre Boomer artifact, and certainly wasn't in play in the late '80s or '90s. I was told that repeatedly when I was a teenager, but it certainly wasn't the case for me or most of the people I knew when I was a young man, 35 years ago. We were all totally blindsided by how bad the high school exp…

Oh, well I guess If you're OK that's all that matters. What's the point of anecdotes if the subject is about statistics.

This site is being overrun by human beings sharing their experiences!

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#48

Post by blowski »

standardUser wrote: post #44
blowski wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Youth are happier with more regimentation Are you saying young people like being given rules?

There's a boatload of research showing kids do better overall with structure, stability and routine.

So they benefit from the extra “regimentation”, although whether they like it or not is another matter.

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#49

Post by khazhoux »

iwanttocomment wrote: post #2

Hey, Gen Z. Gen X here. I personally think this whole "young adulthood is the happiest time of your life" is some sort of bizarre Boomer artifact, and certainly wasn't in play in the late '80s or '90s. I was told that repeatedly when I was a teenager, but it certainly wasn't the case for me or most of the people I knew when I was a young man, 35 years ago. We were all totally blindsided by how bad the high school exp…

Hello fellow Gen-Xer. I remember a teacher in high school (male, coach, hairy thick forearms) telling us at an end of senior year assembly, with a huge smile: "Enjoy these times, everyone. These will be the happiest days of your life!"

And I immediately thought he was a fucking pathetic loser who needs to stop raining his shitty life over the rest of us. At 17 I wasn't so stupid to believe that could possibly be true. But you hear that crap non-stop from adults at that age.

For a couple of people in my high school that might have actually been true, though. Seems to correlate with getting drunk and high (sorry, "partying") non-stop.

Also, the teacher got arrested a few years later for shoplifting.

Re: Young adulthood is no longer one of life's happiest times

#50

Post by jemmyw »

iwanttocomment wrote: post #2

Hey, Gen Z. Gen X here. I personally think this whole "young adulthood is the happiest time of your life" is some sort of bizarre Boomer artifact, and certainly wasn't in play in the late '80s or '90s. I was told that repeatedly when I was a teenager, but it certainly wasn't the case for me or most of the people I knew when I was a young man, 35 years ago. We were all totally blindsided by how bad the high school exp…

I'm 41 and the happiest I've been. Kids are growing, I've got a well paying job, bit of time for hobbies, and I've started getting more involved in the local community via a sport I enjoy. I could have done some of the the things that make me happy earlier in life but it's hard when you're putting effort into your career.

I didn't enjoy high school times, University was ok but I was too introverted back then.

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