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Hunting Down My Son's Killer

matt.might.net

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Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#41

Post by aphyr »

maratd wrote: post #31
altrego99 wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry, not worth it at all. Years 1-10 - you will loose all your time - cleaning diapers, making the child eat, making it study, teaching it values - waking up at night - and doing a lot of things for it. Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up and you're genetically conditioned to like it. But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code without expecting in…

You either don't have kids or you're a psychopath. I'm leaning toward the former. Don't presume in your arrogance that you know quite a bit about something you have zero experience with. All your accomplishments are pointless without your child next to you. > Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up It? Nice. > But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code…

All your accomplishments are pointless without your child next to you.

You enjoy all of those things to gain the capacity to enrich the life of your child.

I'm unconvinced. There are many worthy things in life; children among them. Doesn't mean your life is worthless if you don't have them.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#42

Post by mcmatterson »

paulhauggis wrote: post #36
mcmatterson wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Balls to this. As your sibling commenter says, you simply don't get to pass judgement on this if you haven't had a child of your own. Sure, we're programmed to behave with an otherwise inexcusable amount of irrationality with our kids, but that's not by accident. If anything, it demonstrates the level of evolutionary importance in keeping our offspring healthy and ensuring their success: it's such an important direct…

"As your sibling commenter says, you simply don't get to pass judgement on this if you haven't had a child of your own." You aren't gay, so you can't pass judgement on gay rights. You don't smoke weed, so you have no say in the laws The thing is. You can still have an opinion (and pass judgement)..even if you haven't experienced it yourself.

You'll notice that later on my comment I said 'I'm not going to say you're objectively wrong on this'. I'm not begrudging the OP his/her opinion, I'm simply saying that without the mental reset that is parenthood, the OP simply does not have enough information to make any factual statement on the matter.

I'm not saying that the OP is wrong or unentitled, I'm simply saying that they're exhibiting a potent mix of naivety and arrogance that they may want to be more aware of. Or, as my sibling poster said in a better way: "Don't presume in your arrogance that you know quite a bit about something you have zero experience with."

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#43

Post by hirenj »

Dn_Ab wrote: post #34
hirenj wrote: post #19

First thoughts reading up on this pretty cool bit of detective work: Since this is a deficiency in production of Pngase F, I'm not sure a simple injection of Pngase F is going to work. I'd guess you'd need to target Pngase F into the ER to kick start the proper clean-up process, and the human form ( http://www.uniprot.org/uniprot/Q96IV0 ) is different to the recombinant form that you can get synthesised ( http://www.…

In what way is experimental analysis of such mutations a bottleneck?

Well, once you pinpoint a potential mutation on a gene - that gives you a starting point into the pathway that could be possibly producing this particular disease. From there, it's sort of like clicking outwards from a wikipedia page, except instead of wiki pages, its related genes. Every one you go to, you read and find out what people know about it. You then start to form a picture in your head as to what the mechanisms of action are for this particular gene - what it does and how it is regulated.

From there, you build your model for how the gene works, and do some knock-outs / knock-ins, test it in various cell lines, verify the kinetics, try to find out the 3D structure. Really, anything you can do to get a handle on how this actually works in the system. It's quite normal for people to spend their entire PhD studying the mechanism of action for a single gene!

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#44

Post by aidenn0 »

altrego99 wrote: post #20
jasonlotito wrote: post #9

As a father with a son with severe autism (not to suggest it's equivalent to Bertrand's condition), there is an important lesson here that might not be apparent at first read. Before you have children, understand that it's for the rest of your life. Really understand the impact. Your concerns are second, beyond anything you've ever understood. Marriage is about compromise. Children, however, afford no such privilege.…

Sorry, not worth it at all. Years 1-10 - you will loose all your time - cleaning diapers, making the child eat, making it study, teaching it values - waking up at night - and doing a lot of things for it. Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up and you're genetically conditioned to like it. But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code without expecting in…

I posted a longer post as a sibling to this before I read your comment. In a lot of ways this is true, and I encourage anyone who agrees with you to not become a parent, rather than being a poor parent.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#45

Post by [deleted] »

maratd wrote: post #31
altrego99 wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry, not worth it at all. Years 1-10 - you will loose all your time - cleaning diapers, making the child eat, making it study, teaching it values - waking up at night - and doing a lot of things for it. Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up and you're genetically conditioned to like it. But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code without expecting in…

You either don't have kids or you're a psychopath. I'm leaning toward the former. Don't presume in your arrogance that you know quite a bit about something you have zero experience with. All your accomplishments are pointless without your child next to you. > Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up It? Nice. > But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code…

[deleted]

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#46

Post by ericb »

tomjen3 wrote: post #21
jasonlotito wrote: post #9

As a father with a son with severe autism (not to suggest it's equivalent to Bertrand's condition), there is an important lesson here that might not be apparent at first read. Before you have children, understand that it's for the rest of your life. Really understand the impact. Your concerns are second, beyond anything you've ever understood. Marriage is about compromise. Children, however, afford no such privilege.…

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

I think what you're missing is the emotion, the meaning, and the beauty of having children. And sure, if you leave all that out by willfully ignoring it, then your point makes sense. One could argue that, by the same token, living is just to protect and create the next generation and rationally has no point.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#47

Post by aidenn0 »

mcmatterson wrote: post #29
altrego99 wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry, not worth it at all. Years 1-10 - you will loose all your time - cleaning diapers, making the child eat, making it study, teaching it values - waking up at night - and doing a lot of things for it. Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up and you're genetically conditioned to like it. But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code without expecting in…

Balls to this. As your sibling commenter says, you simply don't get to pass judgement on this if you haven't had a child of your own. Sure, we're programmed to behave with an otherwise inexcusable amount of irrationality with our kids, but that's not by accident. If anything, it demonstrates the level of evolutionary importance in keeping our offspring healthy and ensuring their success: it's such an important direct…

A non-parent could similarly argue that you don't get to pass judgement since you are under the influence of cognitive dissonance.

Regardless, I have met parents who feel that way, and it can often turn out poorly for the child, though it really depends. One person I know who feels this way is a DBA who earns more than enough for his wife to raise the kids. She works part-time more to escape cabin-fever than to earn money and seems happy with the arrangement. His long work hours means he doesn't have to deal with the kids any more than he wants to.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#48

Post by Dn_Ab »

As not a parent I will not even pretend to relate with what you are going through. But this is one of the most moving and amazing things I have ever read. A book could not contain the details of just how incredible your story is.

Science does work. The confluence of technologies - search, websites,email, computers, bioinformatics, pharmacology, medical technology (and if hirenj's* advice proves useful then forums, it should be at the top), such that someone can identify, diagnose, commision/customize medication and possibly treat a completely new disease in the span of a few years..The future really is here. An ode to the open source technologies and not so open research that made this possible. Of course it is worth pointing out that the skill required to research, evaluate possible leads, try then untry possible treatments, contact and manage communication with the researchers is also not to be underestimated.

*http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=4038495

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#49

Post by jonmb »

aphyr wrote: post #41
maratd wrote: post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You either don't have kids or you're a psychopath. I'm leaning toward the former. Don't presume in your arrogance that you know quite a bit about something you have zero experience with. All your accomplishments are pointless without your child next to you. > Yes you'll see it learn, smile, grow up It? Nice. > But you will not be able to play your games, go to your parties - read book or contemplate on life, or code…

All your accomplishments are pointless without your child next to you. You enjoy all of those things to gain the capacity to enrich the life of your child. I'm unconvinced. There are many worthy things in life; children among them. Doesn't mean your life is worthless if you don't have them.

Agreed. Saying children are not worth it is an extreme position, but saying that life is pointless without children is perhaps even more extreme. It's like saying life is pointless without a wife, or without God.

Re: Hunting Down My Son's Killer

#50

Post by waffle_ss »

tomjen3 wrote: post #21
jasonlotito wrote: post #9

As a father with a son with severe autism (not to suggest it's equivalent to Bertrand's condition), there is an important lesson here that might not be apparent at first read. Before you have children, understand that it's for the rest of your life. Really understand the impact. Your concerns are second, beyond anything you've ever understood. Marriage is about compromise. Children, however, afford no such privilege.…

It is only 'worth it' because your genes needs you to protect the next generation. Rationally there is no point in having children at all. And speaking statistically, research shows that parents are no more happy than are those who are not parents.

Rationally, there is no point in a lot of things (up to and including just sitting idle as a respiring organism). Do you get your sustenance from an IV bag of the basic chemicals your body needs to survive, or do you eat food that you enjoy the taste of? Do you cover yourself with a burlap sap, or do you wear clothing of a design you prefer? Do you get to work on your own locomotive power (walk, ride bicycle) or use a vehicle?

Variety is the spice of life. We do things that we find intellectually and emotionally stimulating.

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