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Chris Seaton has died

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Re: Chris Seaton has died

#41

Post by altendo »

leetrout wrote: post #7

Please talk to someone if you are feeling hopeless. U.S. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 800-273-TALK (8255) National Suicide Helpline UK 0800 689 5652 His HN profile was also just his name https://news.ycombinator.com/user?id=chrisseaton I wish the best for his family and friends over the next few months. This will be a tough holiday season for them. You never know what is going on in someone's life and no clue…

In the US, dialing 988 will also get you access to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. (Technically it is now the 988 Lifeline, but they both refer to the same thing[1].)

1: https://988lifeline.org/current-events/the-lifeline-and-988/

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#42

Post by xtracto »

schneems wrote: post #36
graderjs wrote: post #28

Seeing some of the comments here how people valued him, it seems like maybe sometimes these sentiments of gratitude are not expressed until after someone passes. It works if folks cherish the time they have, and remind people of how they appreciate them while they're still on Earth in their body.

I had lunch with him on Wednesday and wish I said more. I also worry about the hidden pressures of praise. A overly critical inner life can interpret it as “I like you as long as you are useful” which is of course not the truth. I have appreciation for the creators in my life, even when they no longer create.

>I like you as long as you are useful” which is of course not the truth.

I think that's the problem with depression disease: no matter what most people tell you, your brain will find a way to use it to dig the hole deeper.

My wife has battled with minor depression and anxiety her whole life. I learned that more than trying to say things to cheer her up in the moment, i was more useful by looking for treatment.

It's a terrible disease.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#43

Post by toomuchtodo »

tiffanyh wrote: post #31

Internet Archive. Does anyone know how to recursively save his entire website to Wayback Machine? I submitted https://chrisseaton.com , but it doesn't appear any of the child pages are being archived.

Done. Will take some time for any straggler pages to show up in the CDX indexes.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#45

Post by Lio »

OJFord wrote: post #17
Mikeb85 wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> For learning purposes, anyone knows what was his major cause of frustration? Suicide isn't because of frustration. Everyone has frustrations, most don't kill themselves because of it.

I do think it's interesting that it's so widely stigmatised (illegal even) though: like we've collectively decided life is meaningful and must be lived to the best of your ability, deciding there's nothing in it for you and you don't want to take part is not (with very niche old-age && ill-health exception) allowed. Weird, when you step back and think about it isn't it? If you're agnostic/atheist at least.

I would speculate that the societal stigmatisation of suicide is a form of social "guard-rails" that might keep someone from stepping to far in the wrong direction during a moment of weakness.

It might be the last thing that saves them when they are not in their right mind and have lost all hope and perspective. In that moment anything that can be done to protect them should be done because there is always hope, even if you can't see it right now.

Things do change.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#46

Post by sbuccini »

This cuts deep. Chris had a big impact on my current life trajectory, one that is still playing out -- which is why I was holding off on reaching out with an update. Now I'll never get that chance.

Chris seemed to be _everywhere_ and was always generous with his time, even to complete newbies like myself. He certainly set the standard, as one would expect from an Army officer. I'm not exactly sure what his experiences were like in active duty, but we lose way too many vets to mental health issues. If you know a veteran, consider checking in -- this time of year is particularly tough.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#47

Post by layer8 »

graderjs wrote: post #28

Seeing some of the comments here how people valued him, it seems like maybe sometimes these sentiments of gratitude are not expressed until after someone passes. It works if folks cherish the time they have, and remind people of how they appreciate them while they're still on Earth in their body.

If he indeed committed suicide out of depression, I would imagine that maybe he realized after years of relative successes that nothing, no achievement, no appreciation/gratitude by others, will cure his depression. At least that wouldn’t be an uncommon pattern for high-intellect people with severe depression.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#48

Post by eatonphil »

nirvdrum wrote: post #32
tiffanyh wrote: post #31

Internet Archive. Does anyone know how to recursively save his entire website to Wayback Machine? I submitted https://chrisseaton.com , but it doesn't appear any of the child pages are being archived.

If it helps any, Chris's web site used GitHub Pages and its source is available at https://github.com/chrisseaton/chrisseaton.github.io .

There's no particular guarantee that this will stick around either as Github/MS changes policies down the line. Some guaranteed long-term archive like archive.org would be better.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#49

Post by toyg »

schneems wrote: post #36
graderjs wrote: post #28

Seeing some of the comments here how people valued him, it seems like maybe sometimes these sentiments of gratitude are not expressed until after someone passes. It works if folks cherish the time they have, and remind people of how they appreciate them while they're still on Earth in their body.

I had lunch with him on Wednesday and wish I said more. I also worry about the hidden pressures of praise. A overly critical inner life can interpret it as “I like you as long as you are useful” which is of course not the truth. I have appreciation for the creators in my life, even when they no longer create.

> A overly critical inner life can interpret it as “I like you as long as you are useful”

That's me after most praise: "you say you like me because the stuff I can do will help you, or because you have some unstated aim to take advantage of me, or because you don't know that it could have been so much better". I don't know when, but at some point any expectation of honesty in praise just went out of the window. Because of that, obviously, I also don't praise people as much as I should, because I expect they would react like I do - with obvious repercussions on social interactions.

The mind can be a right bitch.

Re: Chris Seaton has died

#50

Post by swader999 »

kshahkshah wrote: post #20

My god this is awful. He was brilliant, accomplished, and kind. A few days ago he announced his 'permanent rest' ( https://twitter.com/ChrisGSeaton/status/1599108759183577088 ). I'd thought it meant from the Ruby community and that the replies asking if he needed help were reading too much into the wording.

The outpouring of love in the replies on that thread. It is tough to comprehend how that wasn't enough to prevent this.
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