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Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

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Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#41

Post by souprock »

lotsofpulp wrote: post #27
souprock wrote: post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

3.5 kids per adult then. So for just 3.5 kids, you'd need to pay 100% of a salary plus all the extras of running a business. (insurance, legal, finance, advertising, sewage, electricity, food, toys, etc.) Given the overhead, you'd expect daycare for 2 kids to consume the working parent's entire pay. For a low-paid parent, just 1 kid might consume the entire pay. Obviously that isn't viable. I know a handyman in Massa…

Were all 11 kids under the age of 3? FYI, it takes differing amounts of attention and work to care for children at different ages. I don’t know if you have ever cared for a baby, but I have with a ratio of 2 kids under 3 years old and 1 adult (myself), and I don’t even know how people at daycare do it with a 4 to 1 ratio.

I have 12 kids, with one more to be born this summer. The 4th and 5th were twins.

Babies are not difficult. Teenagers are difficult. I have experience with both.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#42

Post by dylanz »

PebblesHD wrote: post #2

While I don’t specifically fall into this category, I’d like to broaden it to younger men starting families. The reason my partner and I haven’t moved toward doing so is primarily economic, we still can’t afford a house and rental laws here mean we could be kicked out at quite short notice. We don’t want to bring a child into an environment that we aren’t even able to keep stable for ourselves. Others we know are in…

The scenario of not wanting to bring a child into an environment that isn't stable is exactly one of the points of the intro to the movie Idiocracy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sP2tUW0HDHA

I definitely understand 100%... I just thought it sounded extremely familiar. In my personal scenario, I had my first kid (unplanned) when I was 25. It definitely changed the trajectory of my life, and in a good way in my case. Once I knew I was having a kid I really started to take things more seriously and tried to set up as good of an environment as I could. That meant studying a lot, surrounding myself with good families, moving into a place with more exposure to nature, etc. We never owned a home, had retirement saved up, or a lot of the other things one would consider good "nest egg" scenarios. We just made it work when we had to, and have 2 awesome teenagers now.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#43

Post by tolbish »

do_not_cancel32 wrote: post #8

I am in my late 20s and a senior engineer at FAANG. I am conventionally attractive and have been asked out by numerous women over the years, even when I did not have my FAANG salary. However, I have had very few sexual partners. The article has four ideas on why men like me have fewer partners. That men lack the money for partners, that the top 10% of men outcompete the bottom 90% on social media apps, that at least…

Yes, but why would you want to replace a partner with a tube site?

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#44

Post by tolbish »

rafaelvasco wrote: post #40
throwawayA666 wrote: post #28

I find women to be too shallow. But I don't feel anger towards women or feel upset about it, rather I devote my life to the things I enjoy doing.

I kinda understand you. Most women don't interest me as well. It takes more than a hot body and a pretty face. It takes a hot mind and/or a warm heart for me. Contrast this with most of my friends. They're all easily satisfied. If the girl is dumb and hot, they're game.

What makes you think that's what most women want? By that logic wouldn't most men want something as superficial? Also there are a lot of smart women out there...what is your reasoning for not being with those types?

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#45

Post by diebeforei485 »

staticman2 wrote: post #11
jimmaswell wrote: post #3

I'm betting on dating sites and the internet in general. Our evolutionary biology is for the women to only get pregnant by the fittest available male in the "tribe" because it's such an investment in time and resources (also why men are inclined to go around with whoever they can, it's all benefit and no cost to "dine and dash"), and now the "tribe" we percieve is artifically extended with the fittest possible specim…

You have some odd ideas there. You might want to read The Moral Animal by Robert Wright for a more nuanced view of human nature by an evolutionary psychologist. (A field which is controversial at the best of times- but if you're going to believe something controversial but possibly true you can do a lot better than what you posted here) If I wasn't on my phone i'd type more, but in brief you have a weird idea of what…

I haven't read the book (it was written before I was born lol) but Tinder isn't about finding a partner to have kids with.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#46

Post by maxk42 »

PebblesHD wrote: post #2

While I don’t specifically fall into this category, I’d like to broaden it to younger men starting families. The reason my partner and I haven’t moved toward doing so is primarily economic, we still can’t afford a house and rental laws here mean we could be kicked out at quite short notice. We don’t want to bring a child into an environment that we aren’t even able to keep stable for ourselves. Others we know are in…

Alright unpopular opinion time: You could afford a house if you were willing to move to a more undesirable area.

With the rise of remote work in the past year, people (not necessarily you) have more options than ever before for housing, yet they continue to cluster in small, desirable, high-rent areas rather than living less glamorously in exurban or rural areas.

House prices in my neighborhood have broken the $500k mark (and much more in other places nearby), yet a quick zillow search shows housing in several areas less than an hour from my house available for below $100k with stagnant prices. If I were willing to live even further afield, I could get a mobile home for below $75k, and in the eastern half of the US I see hundreds (thousands?) of places available for below $50k.

If you want the prices to improve then stop paying high prices.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#47

Post by temp-dude-87844 »

jimmaswell wrote: post #3

I'm betting on dating sites and the internet in general. Our evolutionary biology is for the women to only get pregnant by the fittest available male in the "tribe" because it's such an investment in time and resources (also why men are inclined to go around with whoever they can, it's all benefit and no cost to "dine and dash"), and now the "tribe" we percieve is artifically extended with the fittest possible specim…

It's not necessary to suppose that humans date like a prehistoric caricature; it's far more likely that people are making decisions based on the kind of information easily available to them, and their intuition about how likely that signal is to be accurate.

It's a discovery problem: people on today's mainstream dating sites select first on looks, then on profile substance, then on digital communication style and/or availability, and then on in-person compatibility. People filtered out from someone's potential matches at earlier stages in the process do not make it to later stages.

People in real life choose dates using the same criteria, but the order of filtering stages is more flexible to the circumstances. In real life, it's also more likely to benefit from a trusted third party who introduces you to a match.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#48

Post by xxxyyj5 »

throwawayA666 wrote: post #28

I find women to be too shallow. But I don't feel anger towards women or feel upset about it, rather I devote my life to the things I enjoy doing.

Yea there's a prevailing notion being pushed nowadays that women are the exact same as men but magically better.

Add in the moral panic surrounding consent and sex, and you get a chilling effect on courtship and socializing.

What incentive do men have to interact with women, when the social climate makes it a tight-rope walk where even the slightest false impression of impropriety will forever destroy your reputation?

Especially when you can get off to porn? Sorry, it's obvious why things are the way they are and only politically invested types would care to argue otherwise.

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#49

Post by osacial »

ericmcer wrote: post #37
staticman2 wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You have some odd ideas there. You might want to read The Moral Animal by Robert Wright for a more nuanced view of human nature by an evolutionary psychologist. (A field which is controversial at the best of times- but if you're going to believe something controversial but possibly true you can do a lot better than what you posted here) If I wasn't on my phone i'd type more, but in brief you have a weird idea of what…

How do you convey that via 6 pictures and ~100 words. Also “convince a woman to mate with him because he will help her with the kids”...

Are you asking(for a friend) how to date?

Re: Why are fewer men in their 20s having sex?

#50

Post by kruxigt »

do_not_cancel32 wrote: post #8

I am in my late 20s and a senior engineer at FAANG. I am conventionally attractive and have been asked out by numerous women over the years, even when I did not have my FAANG salary. However, I have had very few sexual partners. The article has four ideas on why men like me have fewer partners. That men lack the money for partners, that the top 10% of men outcompete the bottom 90% on social media apps, that at least…

Somewhat ironic considering the reason your brain want to put in a lot of work at a FAANG is to get to procreate. I'm talking evolutionary that is.
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