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Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

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Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#41

Post by Grimm1 »

hdfhu wrote: post #32

"Successful people" are those that come to the ocean shore, build a sand castle (indeed, what else is this sand for?), develop depression protecting it from wind, water and sun, and even force other tourists to build the castle for them. And they die wondering why the ocean shore is such a cruel and pointless place. Their lives aren't worthless,though: at least they develop some will. The wise don't build castles, th…

Thinking without interaction may as well be useless. Even the type of people I believe you to be speaking about wrote and shared their writings to influence others.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#42

Post by seigando »

colinmhayes wrote: post #17
asimovfan wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

According to karmic religions him having screwed someone over doesn't let you off the hook for the bad karma you're accruing when you screw them.

Luckily karmic religions aren't real.

Maybe not but 'karma' in its original meaning of cause and effect is: if you hurt somebody, they will be hurt.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#43

Post by crispyambulance »

Cerium wrote: post #34
wiradikusuma wrote: post #28

It could be Asian thing (I'm Asian), but there's a saying, "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure hell better crying inside my BMW than crying outside by the street."

What are your thoughts on the (in my experience more common) phrase: "I would rather cry in a BMW than laugh on a bicycle"? When I really consider this phrase it brings tears to my eyes.

That makes me think of the flippant quip: "Whoever dies with the most toys wins."

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#44

Post by philwelch »

Cerium wrote: post #34
wiradikusuma wrote: post #28

It could be Asian thing (I'm Asian), but there's a saying, "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure hell better crying inside my BMW than crying outside by the street."

What are your thoughts on the (in my experience more common) phrase: "I would rather cry in a BMW than laugh on a bicycle"? When I really consider this phrase it brings tears to my eyes.

That happens to me sometimes, but when it does, I find the leather seats in my BMW very comforting.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#45

Post by AnIdiotOnTheNet »

ta1234567890 wrote: post #10
laurent92 wrote: post #5

- A successful life often feels like day-to-day failure. Failure to reach ambitious goals, but 90% of the goal is often good enough. - Dedicating one’s life to work is often a form of suicide. « SINCE my life is void and I won’t do anything tonight, why not study this book, apply for an MBA or build a company. At least that will be some challenge. It’s not like I’m losing family time, and it will help me focus on one…

> if most people’s lives were fulfilling, we wouldn’t see that much technological progress Which then makes you wonder: do we really need that much technological progress? I love technology, especially when it helps people lead better lives. But if we are just developing it without real purpose and mentally/emotionally enslaving ourselves to do it, then it seems self-defeating.

I've also come to think this in recent times. Take the modern web for example: created largely for the sake of ensnaring and exploiting those who use it, and constantly reinvented with additional complexity to the benefit of the resumes of those who develop it.

But it isn't just the web. Even a modern TV is full of additional bullshit complexity that makes life worse.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#46

Post by notacoward »

gaukes wrote: post #38
notacoward wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Narcissism" is an unnecessarily pejorative way to put it. Narcissism is about having an inflated view of one's own merit, importance, or appearance. In popular parlance it also refers to an unquenchable need for external validation of these qualities. However, most of the issues mentioned in the OP are often associated with self-doubt and/or internal motivation - i.e. the very opposite of narcissism. Frankly, using…

Narcissism isn’t necessarily characterized by strength even though we imagine the quintessential narcissist people to be “strong” and “driven”. That may be true in their professional lives but not personal. Narcissists are driven by external validation and appearance, yes. So much so that they forget the people most important to their lives are humans too, not tools or ornaments of achievement. When these relationshi…

Nobody's defending narcissism. My objection was to reflexively associating these problems with narcissism, and by answering only in the context of narcissism you're still equating the two. So let me even more blunt: that theory is so weak that it's almost self-refuting. Let's try to apply it to the OP and see just how badly it goes.

The first item on the list is inability to celebrate. How does that suggest narcissism? Can it not be explained at least as well by feelings that the subject of celebration is undeserved, transitory, and subject to reversal?

The second item on the list is inability to rest. How does that suggest narcissism? Can it not be explained at least as well by feelings that one is an impostor, unable to keep up without making extra effort?

And so on. Every connection you claim points to narcissism actually points even more strongly somewhere else. Narcissism causes problems, to be sure, but it's far from the only thing that can cause these problems. Claiming that these issues are all about narcissism is tantamount to claiming that conventionally-measured success itself is all about narcissism. As I said, it comes across as a big load of sour grapes.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#47

Post by kiliantics »

wiradikusuma wrote: post #37
Cerium wrote: post #34

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What are your thoughts on the (in my experience more common) phrase: "I would rather cry in a BMW than laugh on a bicycle"? When I really consider this phrase it brings tears to my eyes.

I'm biased, I prefer (nice) bicycles than (nice) cars. Not because it's healthier, but because I don't like to be stuck in traffic. -- Again, living in overpopulated Asian country.

Cycling a bicycle is just easily one of the greatest of human experiences.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#48

Post by dbtc »

Grimm1 wrote: post #41
hdfhu wrote: post #32

"Successful people" are those that come to the ocean shore, build a sand castle (indeed, what else is this sand for?), develop depression protecting it from wind, water and sun, and even force other tourists to build the castle for them. And they die wondering why the ocean shore is such a cruel and pointless place. Their lives aren't worthless,though: at least they develop some will. The wise don't build castles, th…

Thinking without interaction may as well be useless. Even the type of people I believe you to be speaking about wrote and shared their writings to influence others.

We don't know how many more did not write or share their writings

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#49

Post by x87678r »

wiradikusuma wrote: post #28

It could be Asian thing (I'm Asian), but there's a saying, "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure hell better crying inside my BMW than crying outside by the street."

Money can't buy happiness, but you can park your yacht right next to it.

Re: Things the most successful people I know struggle with to be happy

#50

Post by Apofis »

hdfhu wrote: post #32

"Successful people" are those that come to the ocean shore, build a sand castle (indeed, what else is this sand for?), develop depression protecting it from wind, water and sun, and even force other tourists to build the castle for them. And they die wondering why the ocean shore is such a cruel and pointless place. Their lives aren't worthless,though: at least they develop some will. The wise don't build castles, th…

Wise people don't like playing with sand on a beach?
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