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I assume I'm below average

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Re: I assume I'm below average

#41

Post by cookiecaper »

wheels wrote: post #6

I doubt Derek really believes this. At least for me it would be paralyzing to think that I was below average at everything . I assume what he really means is, "below average in x , but I make up for that with y ." I think it'd be hard to have done as well as Derek if you honestly managed to convince yourself that you were below average intelligence, below average skill in your profession, below average ability to mot…

It's not about being below average capacity, it's about believing that your currently-realized capacities are below average and below their limits. It's motivating. It's not about discouragement or not believing you can do something, it's actually the opposite; you know that you can improve in whatever you do so you're not afraid to learn from others. Assuming that you're "below average" in this article merely means to be teachable.

It's actually the opposite of what you're talking about here; Derek is not below-average capacity, he just has a lot of capacity yet to be realized and is willing to both admit that and take steps to improve.

Re: I assume I'm below average

#44

Post by jseliger »

So you're assume that you're above average in the category of assumptions about one's averages.

One the one hand, I don't want to call someone falsely modest, but on the other, that tag fits awfully well.

Re: I assume I'm below average

#45

Post by baddox »

While many of these are probably valid points, some such as the "better than average driver" one just doesn't seem valid personally. Unless you can demonstrate that I'm not average or better at driving, then just because everyone else also claims to be better than average doesn't mean that I'm incorrect. I've never had a speeding ticket or been in an automobile accident, and I've only been pulled over once (for a missing tail light in a truck I had purchased just hours earlier). Please try to convince me I'm average or worse—I think you'll fail.

Re: I assume I'm below average

#46

Post by ellyagg »

It's best not to worry about whether you're average or above average or below average. Instead, winners focus on setting personal goals and incrementally improving their performance against objective standards. Let others do the comparisons.

Re: I assume I'm below average

#47

Post by baddox »

wheels wrote: post #6

I doubt Derek really believes this. At least for me it would be paralyzing to think that I was below average at everything . I assume what he really means is, "below average in x , but I make up for that with y ." I think it'd be hard to have done as well as Derek if you honestly managed to convince yourself that you were below average intelligence, below average skill in your profession, below average ability to mot…

The first issue is defining what you mean by "average." What does "average at driving" mean? If you're assigning people a competence percentage, then it's quite possible for a large portion of drivers to be above average (e.g. a thousand drivers that are 75% competent and a hundred drivers that are 25% competent). People often throw out the claim that "remember, half of everyone is below average," which implies a contiguous ordinal ranking for all people, in which case "average" is the same as "median."

Re: I assume I'm below average

#48

Post by macrael »

It is really interesting to read the responses to this piece. I was surprised to find many people saying that if they followed Derek's advice it would harm their self-esteem. Assuming that others possess more skill than you does not diminish the value of your own skill. I don't think it is a zero sum game. I think the biggest realization for me recently is just that one should not underestimate people. It is easy to think that others (especially faceless others) aren't as good at something as you are. To quote the late great George Carlin "Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?" It is depressingly easy to judge, and usually we judge negatively, and usually we judge wrong.

Re: I assume I'm below average

#49

Post by charlesju »

I actually take the exact opposite approach on life. One of my favorite entrepreneurial rhetorical questions is: "What would you do if you knew you could not fail?". Confidence in your own abilities forces you to try and break boundaries that you would otherwise fail to even start if you felt inadequate. I am proud to have a massive ego and I work daily on breaking down my fears and insecurities. The NUMBER ONE reason why entrepreneurs fail is because they give up. No one gives up if they think they're above average, exceptional, doing better than other startups. People GIVE UP because of fear, insecurities, feeling they are below average.

Just look at all the hot shot entrepreneurs that we all admire, they're all grade-A d-bags (Steve Jobs, Mark Cuban, Larry Ellison, Donald Trump, etc.) and that's because they believed they were larger than life, they acted upon that belief, and they actualized it.

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