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Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

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Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#41

Post by ffn »

The same way you deal with getting older in any other profession, you learn to accept that there will always be people better, faster, and younger than you, embrace the fact that you suck, but still persevere in pushing forward at your own best pace. You strip away the pride (i.e. the feeling that you somehow deserve / need to win, to be the next big thing, to change the world, to be loved / respected by everyone, to do better than your old high school classmates, and to do it all in your teens and twenties) that covers the youthfully inexperienced. And you accept that the most you can do is put yourself on the path that you can enjoy and that you hope is right and commit to walking down it clad in nothing more than simple stupid faith that eventually you can get it to work.

Non-purple TL;DR: I deal with it by abandoning any sense of pride / shame I might've had.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#42

Post by issa »

I don't think of getting older as something to "deal with". Maybe if you were a pro athlete, that would be an OK way to look at it. But as a programmer/thinker/business person, I get better everyday. And so do my peers based on my observations.

Granted, I don't recognize pop culture references much but, aside from that, and needing to sit for a minute before getting out of bed in the morning, not much has changed.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#43

Post by joesmo »

bischofs wrote: post #20

Why do you have to be 20 to be doing something interesting? Also why is it assumed that every new innovation that some 20 year old ivy league drop comes up with is good for our society and our culture? To me most start ups are just superfluous, these apps and such are created just to make our lives slightly more convenient in most cases, they rarely improve the human condition or outlook. Go ahead and glorify the sta…

You don't. Many successful startups are started by people over 30 (http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/235357).

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#44

Post by paulojreis »

aerovistae wrote: post #2

"Hack life"...please, just stop with this. Can we coin a new phrase?

I'm surprised nobody mentioned "life engineering".

In our echo chamber, engineering is the mother of all disciplines; the other day I noticed someone using "interaction engineer" referring to a supposed UX position. :)

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#45

Post by joesmo »

hipsterrific wrote: post #40

I'm 35 and I'm not at all complaining. Career wise, I've not only learned more technically but it seems like I'm learning better/faster these days than 10+ years ago. On a personal note, it's nice to know I'm established with a decent amount in my savings and retirement. With friends, most of my friends are younger but it's nice to be able to partner with them and go through life shoulder to shoulder. It's nice to kn…

"The nice thing is, 35 seems to be a starting point for me."

Nice. I'm 34, almost 35, and I feel the same way. I'm actually seriously thinking about starting a business now whereas in my twenties, I was more interested in leisure activities. Definitely seems like a much better time to start something than when I was younger.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#46

Post by sago »

I can't write code nearly as fast as I used to. I am much better at writing less code, though. And though it took a while (too long), I've figured out that it's the code you don't write that makes you great. So I'm much more skilled and competent as a 40 yo than I was as a precocious 20 year old.

The biggest change has been values though. My values and my criteria for success are different now than they were when I founded my first business at 22. Now with a family, assets, residual income and a home, I'm far far more interested in being interested than I am in numerical 'success', and much more motivated by social justice. So I definitely don't have the hunger for startup life. I don't feel lost in that culture. I just feel that I've been there, got the t-shirt, and moved beyond, so I don't feel the need to go back for more than the odd visit.

So yeah, maybe I'm getting over the hill in some ways. But that's not a bad thing. I don't feel out-competed, I just feel like experience and perspective have made me change what I value, both in code and in business (and other bits of life: in relationships, in vacations, in hobbies, etc).

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#47

Post by codingdave »

Honestly, I feel like I've outgrown the whole "dreaming up the next big thing." I know my dreams. I am already following them.

I feel like the younger folk tend to re-invent ideas that have come and gone, and don't do enough research to see what has come before. They spin their wheels figuring out things that us older folk already know. Sure, they do it with newer toolkits than I know, and that is why I keep up on HN - because the newer technologies are where the younger crowd can teach me something.

But I don't feel lost in the culture... I feel disinterested in it.

I also think that being older, with a family, and a full life outside of work, I'm not interested in pursuing wealth the same way that young people are. I have a nest egg, I have a good salary, I also have a wife, children, a small farm that we run, mountains, deserts and oceans to explore, stars to look at, etc.

I am no longer 23 and trying to establish my life. I am 43, have built a life that works for me, and am far more concerned with raising my children than with raising my wealth. To me wealth is binary - you have enough to live your life, or you do not. At the moment, I do.

So can I hack life to get more out of it? I think I already have.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting older?

#50

Post by DrNuke »

Aging well in terms of skills, experience and exposure to the best practices and the flow of technologies may be rewarding when teams decide strategies: been there, done that is a way to spot and hopefully avoid common mistakes. That said, reinventing the wheel is a learning process itself and success is more often singular than the result of a plan.
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